Not certain what's wrong with son...

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2005
Not certain what's wrong with son...
5
Tue, 09-06-2005 - 3:39pm

Hi Everyone;
I am trying to discern if my three and a half year old son has PDD-NOS, or high needs with Sensory Integration Dysfunction or if he's simply just an energetic little boy. I've posted this question in a couple of other forums because I don't know what is the best fit for him if any. He's definitely a handful for me and his preschool class, but I can't tell if that's because he's very much a boy, or if it's something else. Some of the things that I would say I'm concerned with are:

- Extremely high energy. He will sit still and focus when a book is being read to him, he's playing with his toy trains or he's watching TV, but other than that he's constantly in motion.

- Does not listen well. When he wants to do something or touch something you have to tell him six times till Sunday to stop and even then he'll try to argue his cause.

- Has extreme difficulty in transitioning. Even with a five minute warning he will still have melt downs if he doesn't want to cease and desist the activity he's engrossed in.

- Becomes very anxious when he senses an activity it coming to an end. For example, if you go for a walk and it's time to turn round and walk home he'll start to fuss to continue walking because he doesn't want the walk to end.

- Tends to hug people quite a bit. I've started to tell him that it's okay to hug his mummy and daddy, but a simple "hi" to other friends and adults is fine.

- In his preschool last year the teacher was frustrated because if a child initiated bad behaviour, Vaughan would immediately join in and continue even after the other child stopped.

- When he's in trouble and you tell him to look you in your eyes, you have to ask him repeatedly before he will do so (can't tell if that's because he knows he's in trouble and doesn't want to face the music.)

- Vaughan has always been high on the sleep scale and even now at 3 1/2 if he doesn't get his two hour nap (after sleeping 12 at night) his behaviour deteriorates and becomes unbearable and destructive.

- Hates having a bath and his hair washed.

- Between the ages of 2 yrs and 35 months had a phobia of leaves blowing on the ground.

- Sucks his thumb and attached to his blanky (but only sucks thumb when watching TV, being read a book or sleeping).

Now the positives:

- He is very empathic and loving to his siblings and friends. When I'm upset with him he'll cry "Mummy, I want you to be happy with me! Don't be sad!"

- Bright, articulate and creative - loves to read books and make up stories with his trains. Enjoys play dough.

- Friendly in preschool and never verbally or physically abusive with peers.

- Mischievous and funny - likes to make other people laugh.

- Athletic and enjoys playing games like soccer and tag with the neighbourhood kids.

I hope I've written enough to give you a sense of my little guy - it's a complex age and I don't want to slap a label on him, but I also don't want to not parent him according to his needs.

Thanks.






Mum to:

Vaughan Alexander 3/2/2002

Niav Elizabeth Wynn 28/9/2003

Simon Nathaniel 15/1/2005

and a Saint Bernard puppy
Mum to:
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2005
Thu, 09-29-2005 - 6:48am

Thanks everyone for your replies. It turns out my little guy is what's called a Spirited Child, with energy plus! I'm now a member of the spirited child board and have found a tonne of similarities with the other energetic preschoolers there. My son has started a new nursery school and the teachers there say he's very busy (code word for energetic) but nothing out of the norm. This has made me realize that a lot the worry I had from his previous nursery school teacher was probably a fair bit to do with her being an older, easily frazzled woman who does a lot better with calmer, passive children. As my son matures he is rapidly outgrowing a lot of the things that concerned me - I can completely understand why it's important not to slap a label on preschoolers since their rate of maturity and impulse control can increase overnight.

Cheers!






Mum to:

Vaughan Alexander 3/2/2002

Niav Elizabeth Wynn 28/9/2003

Simon Nathaniel 15/1/2005

and a Saint Bernard puppy
Mum to:
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 5:02pm

Ya know, he sounds a bit like my youngest, Dave. Dave is officially diagnosed PDD-NOS but it is provisional and only because the psychologist couldn't figure out just where else to place him yet. He is ADHD and definite SID.

Around that age we did have him evaluated through the school district. His behavior problems and speech were delayed enough that he qualified for special ed. I had to push to keep him on the last couple years but it was so worth it.

He had speech and a behavior support plan in school. It really prepared him for kindergarten and now he is doing pretty darn well. THere are some boys in his K class that did not have that opportunity and they are struggling now. Early intervention is wonderful.

My recomendation, get him evaluated thoroughly, learn what his learning profile and needs are and start working on them now.

AND sensory. Loads of sensory.

Renee

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Wed, 09-28-2005 - 11:57am

I'm new -- both to this board and to the whole PDD thing -- but your son sounds like a "spirited" kid to me. There's a "spirited kids" board here that you might want to check out, as well as a book called "Raising your Spirited Child". The book defines the spirited child as "MORE intense, perceptive, sensitive, persistent, and energetic." My DD fits all the signs of being spirited, which include, as you said, difficulty with transitions, very high energy, strong will, etc. Unfortunately, in addition to her spirited temperament, she also is showing signs of PDD -- a bizarre speech delay, a lack of interest in other children, oddly repetitive behaviors, an incredibly rigid reliance on routine, etc. I'd definitely raise the issue with your pediatrician if you're concerned, but also check out the spirited kids board just to see if it sounds like your son.

Good luck!

Jennifer

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-09-2003
Fri, 09-09-2005 - 8:52pm

Welcome to the board!

~ Chelsea
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2003
Tue, 09-06-2005 - 9:58pm

Hello and welcome,

I see some areas of potential concerns here, but I don't see too many red flags there for PDD per se, (this is just one mom's opinion. I am no expert). However, I believe strongly in following one's gut, and if you have concerns you should have your son evauated by a neuropsychologist.

The schol district will also evaluate, and will address any learning concerns identified (such as a speech delay) but they don't diagnose at this age.

-Paula

-Paula

visit my blog at www.onesickmother.com