I am alone so...

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2003
I am alone so...
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 2:48pm
I rushed to the computer to update all of you on our vacation. Well

the flight out was awesome...Jordan slept on take off from Halifax,

woke up for a bit and played peek a boo with the gentleman behind us,

then fell asleep again before the descent into Calgary (our layover

stop!), then just as we reboarded the plane and sat down he fell back

to sleep. I am convinced that he believes that you board a magic

plane in Calgary, shut your eyes, and then open them to find yourself

in your Great Aunt's house in Vancouver...yep he slept for the ENTIRE

flight and drive from Calgary to my Aunt's. Alicia of course was the

big pro...acting like she had been on a plane everyday of her life.

As soon as the seatbelt was turned off she got out of her carseat and

first sat on someone's lap and then got the flight attendants to get

her a blanket and pillow and laid down on the floor (we had the

bulkhead seats so LOTS of room)

Let me tell you portable DVD players are a GODSEND! For 6 years we

have heard whining, and whimpering from Alicia EVERY time we get in

the car. She isn't extremely agitated but she gets bored with scenery

so the whining starts. Well in the entire 3 weeks (where we drove

over 5000 kilometres---British Columbia is a BIG province- bigger than

Germany, France and some other European country combined--a little

tidbit we picked up during our travels.) we never heard a peep out of

her unless it was laughter at the current movie playing.

In a nutshell we travelled almost the entire province, we were in East

Vancouver, Langley, Fort Langley, Murrayville (those last three are

all part of "Langley City", they have been amalgamated into one

place), White Rock, William's Lake, Barkerville (a REAL gold mining

town that they turned into a tourist attraction complete with period

dressed people---Alicia panned for gold and staked a claim to 5 gold

flakes, AND she took a stagecoach ride), then we also were up north in

Dawson Creek (the Mile 0 post and start of the Alaska Highway...we

could have drove 1536 miles to Fairbanks,) Pouce Coupe (the TINY town

where my Dad was born) and Fort St John...then we went back to

Williams Lake to relax for a few days and then Back down to Vancouver

for the last 3 days of our trip.

During our trip ALicia got to go in a hot tub, which she thoroughly

enjoyed (in fact she thinks we should get one!), went gold panning,

stagecoach riding, swimming in the Pacific Ocean (much warmer than the

Atlantic), jumping on a trampoline (boy was I tired from jumping

her!), shopping, reading and colouring with her cousins, and making

many friends with her MANY cousins. She also did alot of eating

(surprise surprise...that's what she's best at!). She also did

sightseeing of mountains (which noone can appreciate until you

actually see them in full colour....breathtaking!) and wildlife...we

got to see bald eagles, deer, mountain goats, and a bear cub (who was

on the side of the road not 10 feet from us)...we didn't see any

moose, but oh well.

Jordan learned lots of new words and expressions on the trip. Baby

bumps and Big bumps refer to the mountains...they were only baby if

they were more rolling and totally covered in trees, they became BIG

when they were taller than the tree line and craggy and snowy! He now

says plane (which sounds like pleeeenn) and train, he also says please

everytime we drive by a Tim Horton's (peeeaaassseee!). And he learned

WOW (which we get to hear evry time he sees something BIG!) For a

while I lost my name of Mama and became MOOMM (those of you with older

children know the sound of that word...it's an omen for things to

come), because He called my Grandma..MAMA. But now that I am home

again it's mostly Mama again (Thank Goodness! I don't want to be MOM yet)

The family reunion went well, although not everyone got there. We

did end up getting to see everyone at their various homes throughout

the province (hence the 5000 KMs we drove) and everyone pretty much

got along. Let me tell you the dynamics of that side of my family are

WWWAAAAAAYYYYYYY too complicated for me to follow. I'm very glad that

we live out here, away from them. THere are so many of the brothers

and sisters that won't talk to this one, but this one will talk to him

but not to her, but her will talk to this one and him but not to those

ones....very confusing. There were a few of them that thought Jordan

was wild, but they forget how young he is...he did nothing different

than the other children, in fact most of the time that he was running

around he was following the older children. They all thought that

ALicia was the cat's meow (which we ALL know is true) and it came out

that some of them thought I was off my rocker by having Jordan. I

think that one of my AUnt's was the one who started this line of

thinking, because when I heard about it (in front of her) and I

answered that I never wanted just one child, and that while it was

time consuming at the moment, when Jordan became a little older it

would be easier (as he won't be hanging off of me, and will be a

little more independant), and even if both my kids were busy all the

time...I could, and would always be capable of giving them both what

they need...she got VERY defensive and repleid that THEY just thought

that I already had too much on my plate. Now ladies, you would be

proud of me because I bit my tongue, and just calmy replied that none

of THEM knew what I had on my plate because they had never met Alicia

(or her needs) before this vacation. I was seething though, because

noone thought my cousin bit off more than she could chew having three

kids, each ONLY 2 years apart, or any of the others for having 2 or

more...noone thought my cousin Karen bit off more than she could chew

by having 2 kids, barely 2 years apart AND running a daycare out of

her home. Honestly as much as Alicia has CP and all the things that

it entails( which none of them even remotely understands),how can they

say that taking care of her (by herself) would be more work than

running a daycare? Sorry if I'm not making much sense...but you can

see why I think you'd be proud of me for biting my tongue ...I get SO

worked up when people try to judge my life, and my decisions based on

what they THINK they know. Or what they imagine my life to be like.

But besides little things and comments like that...it was awonderful

trip. I am very glad that we went , but boy I am glad to be back

home. Shelley
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 08-23-2004 - 4:13pm




iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2004
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 1:48am
Shelly I'm glad you enjoyed your trip :) You drove right through my home town of 100 Mile House when you went to Williams Lake.... it was a nice place to grow up.

Next time come a little farther west and see Vancouver Island and Victoria....it's gorgeous over here too :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2004
Wed, 08-25-2004 - 11:27pm
I'm glad your vacation went well and I'm definitely proud of you! When I'm in the same situation, I have a real hard time biting my tongue!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2003
Fri, 08-27-2004 - 9:32am
Believe me it WAS SOOOOOO hard! My biggest problem was that they had all come to the conclusion that I "had too much on my plate" WITHOUT even MEETING Alicia. They determined that my beautiful baby girl (although she technically isn't a baby anymore at 6!) was "work" to care for and that another baby would push me over the edge. This is from people who hadn't even seen ME since I was 13 or 16 (depending on what part of BC they came from), they know nothing about me and what I can handle. It also made me feel like if I wanted more children I should put Alicia into a home so that I can handle any other children. All this flashed through my mind and I think that's what saved me...there was too much to respond to so I couldn't say anything.LOL Oh well, I wonder what they are saying now that they know I want another baby?! I imagine they have GREAT coffee talk now!LOL Shelley
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Fri, 08-27-2004 - 9:47am

Shelley, I wonder if they've gone back to the view of the late 1800's and early 1900's?



iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2003
Fri, 08-27-2004 - 10:00am
ALready hugged her a thousand times but will give her one just for you! Now that they have met Alicia (and Jordan) I think they feel a little differently about me having him. THey were all impressed with how she used her eyes for her Yes and No! And they were amazed that she could "recognize" each of them after only one meeting...well duh she IS a smart child and you don't look alike. I really think that they painted a picture of a totally depenant (which in some ways she is) being that had to be watched constantly. They were amazed that I can leave her in front of the TV to watch the Wiggles...and go and cook, or go the bathroom. And of course they couldn't get over how protective of Jordan she is, and then they were stupified by the way my "rough and tumble" boy would be SO gentle when dealing dealing with his sister. Except of course if they were wrestling...then she is fair game for stepping on and pouncing on. LOL

So I think that NOW that they have seen with their own eyes how easily our day goes, that they may change their feelings about me having the second one. I honestly think that they had it in their minds that Alicia had the mind of an infant...to go along with the physical control issues. You should have seen their jaws drop the first time I took her into the bathroom to "go". And they could not believe that she was completely potty trained, or that she "knew" when she needed to go. As much as they were amazed I was even more amazed that there are people who don't realize that "disabled" people are all different and just as much a human being as those who aren't disabled. OK enough of my rant and sorry for the length (apparently I am still burning about their reactions---even though they had them 19 months ago when Jordan was first born)...but I must go feed my children. Talk later....only 5 more days before school starts asnd I have "free time"