It isn't worth it!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
It isn't worth it!!!
9
Thu, 06-04-2009 - 11:11am

Why did I agree to do this!!?? The one thing I did not miss when I had the Gospel group 2 years ago, was needing to find a pianist when the reg guy would not be around.

What do you think I have been doing all freaken week with NO LUCK!! I am so pissed right now!!! The other co-leader is the pianist, and really, he should be finding someone to replace him, right?!? But he is also the principal the the Elementary Catholic school and even though I have no connection with that school, AND he is my 'elder' I just can't seem to tell him where to go regarding this! AND he won't be here for most of the freaken summer!! SO PISSED AM I!!!

I think I am going to call Father and just tell him that I can't do this anymore, the stress and lack of sleep isn't worth it!! As much as I love the other part of it.... SO NOT WORTH THIS CRAP! I am at the point right now that I would walk away completly. I don't even want to sing.

I guess the other part of my rant should be all those who said no this week. Honestly!! This isn't easy!! We don't expect professionals up there, just someone to play the cords or play the guitar!! I am practicing the Mass parts but I only got as far as Grade 4 in piano like 20 years ago. I will continue to practice and hopefully this summer I will be of more help, but I know there are much more talented people in the congregation but they just don't want to be bothered!!

I just want to cry!!




Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)

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Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2009
Thu, 06-04-2009 - 3:16pm

Is the pianist paid or a volunteer??? Well either way HE should be the one to find his own sub esp if you are a volunteer.


There were times in Germany where the

Renee


Wife to Scott


Mom to: Madeleine, James,

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2000
Thu, 06-04-2009 - 4:09pm

Maybe the music ministry needs to take a summer vacation.

 


PJPIIadoration.jpg picture by Kimberly_sahm

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2007
Thu, 06-04-2009 - 5:42pm

It will not kill the congregation to have Mass without music. If there's no musician for a particular Mass, just make sure the Lector coordinator is aware that the Lectors need to prepare the responsorials as a precaution in case there's no one to sing the responsorial.
Talk to the priest that recruited you and tell him "The devil is throwing sand in my path, trying to get me to quit." You'll have his ear then for sure. Clarify the expectations he had of you, versus what you expected when you agreed to take on this role. Then schedule a meeting with the priest, yourself and the other music director to plan the summer's schedule.
It's not fair to each other to leave things in a lurch, especially when there are considerations of the GIRM to adhere to. You have small children, and will be responsible for the ministry in the absence of your co-chair. Your co-chair needs to recognize that and help alleviate some of the extra burden to you ahead of any travel he takes. Perhaps his visible and audible absence will either spark someone to volunteer. Or he'll get feedback that his absence was noted and he just might find his own replacements with a quickness.
Put a notice in the bulletin asking for summer help with music. "Attention singers and instrumentalists of all skill and age! Your music ministry is in search of occasional help from those gifted with the talent to share at Mass this summer. No long term commitments required, but "many the voices, lighter the musical burden" while our varied members travel for the summer. Summer visitors, students home from college, teachers, or anyone God gifted with a voice and presence in our parish - we're talking to you."

Just remember, every time you ask, you're just one more "no" closer to a "yes". Keep asking. It may be the way you ask versus who. Don't ask them in a yes or no format. They'll say no. Ask them "We're looking for occasional piano help while Bob is traveling. These are the weekends we know he's due to be away. Which one would you like to help with?" Heck, you can even put THAT in the bulletin. (or perhaps modify the away part...don't want his home security jeopardized lol)

And silence instead of music, might be what someone in the congregation needs that particular Sunday. Don't sweat it too much. You have bigger fish to fry.

~Trish

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
the rains fall soft upon your fields
and until we meet again,
may God hold you in the palm of His hand.
--old Irish blessing

Irish siggy courtesy beaches59

~Trish

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
the rains fall soft upon your
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 06-04-2009 - 11:32pm

Thanks everyone... I did actually find someone!! I really didn't want to bother her as she always seems to be taken advantage of AND she is already doing the 9:00 Mass (We are doing the 11.) I did call Father, left a message and he did try to call me back twice but didn't leave a message. It is just frustrating!! I do like the idea of the bulletin announcement. I will probably cut and past that one!! As I am also a Music Minister, my first 'job' is getting a sub list going for musicians. The former Music Minister/jack of all trades admitted that she failed in that department (her words!!) She plays herself so when ever someone needed a player, she would just do it therefore no list was ever needed.

I am doing okay in teaching myself, I just wish I didn't sound so... ick! *lol* That and I cantor I really can't play and cantor at the same time and finding willing cantors is almost as hard as finding musicians!

So, so far I have the pianist, at least one guitar and not sure if our bass will be there as she is very busy and graduating HS this month... what sucks, is she is going to Montreal for University... Good for her, but sucky for us!! *grin*




Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)

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Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2009
Fri, 06-05-2009 - 7:22am
I am glad things worked out for this weekend!

Roz

Roz

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-26-2005
Fri, 06-05-2009 - 8:58am

Marianne, the solution is simple (though I did read ahead and see you found someone for this week). The solution is if you continue to have no musicians, you go to Father and say "Sorry Father, but there are no musicians who have stepped forward so no music unless there are musicians willing to do this". End of story.


By the way - the lack of volunteers (for anything in a parish) is not just your parish. It's the same in mine though we do manage with far fewer people than we might like.


Ruth V

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2008
Sat, 06-06-2009 - 7:52pm

I'm glad you were able to find someone. I don't blame you for being frustrated!

I have a lot of respect and admiration for the cantors and musicians. I love Trish's idea of using the bulletin. I would think there would be some high school students who would like to step in. Does your church have a school? For our church, if you volunteer to cantor or play it counts towards your required work hours for the school year so it's extra incentive for people to get involved.

Good luck! I really do admire you for stepping up! Let us know how the bulletin works out.








iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 06-07-2009 - 2:09am

He did call me back and he basically told me not to panic. *grin* Only it took him 5 mins to say it.*lol* I still don't like the fact that it seems like I am getting the short end of the deal here. Not only to I help pick music for the masses our Pianist/partner in crime is there, but I have to do everything myself when he isn't here.

I take this very seriously and once I commit, I am committed and it just infuriates me when not everyone has that same mentality. KWIM?




Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)

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Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Tue, 06-09-2009 - 4:02pm

This is so ironic, because yesterday was the confirmation Mass and the Arch Bishop was there so a Ministry appreciation dinner was presented.

At this dinner, I heard from several people how good the music was for our Mass!! I didn't have anything special! However, we had about 50 extra 'guests' there. There was some sort of Ursuline Nun meeting type thing at the parish. So even though we ran out of communion songs, I guess we were a huge success to the Nuns! *grin* Go figure!! ALSO, because Psalm was #33 for Sunday, we sang 'Rain Down' as a Cantor and response and it was awesome to actually hear the congregation singing the response! I have never experienced it in that magnitude!

Now I get to prepare for the first communion Mass that is the coming Sunday.... *sigh*.




Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)

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Marianne, mom to Margaret (01/02), Elizabeth (03/04) and Annabelle (07/07)