Tired of the rollercoaster

Avatar for my2craigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tired of the rollercoaster
7
Thu, 06-25-2009 - 8:10pm

I know life is full of ups and downs but I'm tired.

Image Hosting by PictureTrail.com

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2008
Wed, 07-01-2009 - 12:47am
(((Megan))) I'm sorry everything is so stressful for your family right now. I'll be sending lots of prayers your way. Things will get better.







Avatar for my2craigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 07-01-2009 - 12:46am

I totally get the whole draining thing. CJ is soooo draining that he's like having two kids in one.

Image Hosting by PictureTrail.com

 

Avatar for my2craigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 06-30-2009 - 11:58pm

Our parish school seems to be more advanced if you will than the public schools.

Image Hosting by PictureTrail.com

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2007
Sun, 06-28-2009 - 3:13am

Megan, if there's a whirling dirvish, it's in front of us right?

My ds15 sounds exactly like your CJ. The vast majority of the behavior issues the teachers have had with my son were because he was bored. He knew the material already and was not about to simply rehash it for the teacher to grade it. His personality is just a demanding one, but I don't let that buy him an out from consequences. Perhaps you can hand CJ the putty knife, spackle and drywall patch and have him fix it himself. Yes, it will require additional scraping and sanding to smooth it, but if he has to fix it with his own hands and time then he might rethink doing such a thing again. Some kids require that consequences be the teacher, because they apparently know everything from birth. DS15 is sweet to everyone who isn't family. The rest of us, he's very hard and critical, and it's draining in every aspect. He is on the waiting list for a college prep magnet high school, but he's not finishing up his online classwork fast enough to meet the Aug 24th first day of school deadline to be done, plus he's about to flunk Geometry and get dropped because he's 3 mos behind and hasn't been submitting work regularly at all. He's going to end up either repeating 10th grade at the neighborhood school, which I'd prefer to avoid because he'll get sucked into the same kind of friends he had before he was sent to live with MIL. Or he's going to a charter school on a local college campus that is geared towards kids in danger of dropping out, gives them access to some of the college level classes, and doesn't herd kids in the hallways like the other high schools. My son has an "old soul" and treating him like any other 15 year old will assuredly cause more problems. I just wish there was a school like this for me when I was in high school. I would've done so much better. All my attempts in the past to get his teachers to understand he must be challenged academically were not heard. Do not back down from being CJ's academic advocate, and consider looking into charter schools that will keep him interested and motivated. Sometimes parochial schools just aren't a good fit for some kids.

DH's work...well all I can say is I will pray that your family continue to have the resources to cover your expenses and keep a roof over your heads, food in your bellies, clothing on your backs and a means to get where you need to be.
I am grateful that my husband is working, even though his schedule sucks like a bleeping shop vac! I certainly can't work full time right now and won't be able to for a while longer.

As for paint, check out the mistint rack of paint at your home improvement/hardware stores. Sometimes a new employee messes up a can of paint, the color isn't right for the customer, etc. I have not paid full retail for any of the paint in my house. The most I paid was $8 a can for 2 cans of primer for my bedroom. The rest was $2-$5 a gallon. One person's "OOPS" is another person's "OOOOH!"
I would have NEVER chosen "French Pastry" for my kitchen normally. But now I love it, and I am not a fan of yellow. I would have never EVER EVER chosen "Applesauce Cake" for my bedroom, but lo and behold get the furniture back in there and put the bedspread back on it...whoa buddy it's a really nice color put together with everything else. My dh said it looked like baby poo brown at first, but it's very soothing to anyone that comes in there. My older sister visits and will sometimes just go lay on my bed to relax because my room has that effect on her.

As for the car...well, I've started backing into parking spots more often than not simply so I can see to get out of there. I realize it's not always permitted but it might help. I keep a guardian angel visor clip in my van. Good Lord knows, I need it! LOL.

~Trish

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
the rains fall soft upon your fields
and until we meet again,
may God hold you in the palm of His hand.
--old Irish blessing

Irish siggy courtesy beaches59

~Trish

May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
the rains fall soft upon your
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2009
Sat, 06-27-2009 - 9:01am

{{{Megan}}}


You do have a lot going on. Praying that dh can find a job that will be steady and not continually wondering when it will end....


as far as your son, have you looked into public school and/or homeschooling? most Catholic elementary schools are designed for the average kid ... they don't have the federal $$ to have specialists to expand to meet the needs of childs at the other ends............


Praying that you get yoru own health issues under control so you can be there to care for family with a full battery every monring

Renee


Wife to Scott


Mom to: Madeleine, James, Abigail, Theresa & John

Renee


Wife to Scott


Mom to: Madeleine, James,

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Fri, 06-26-2009 - 11:49am

Megan,


I'm sorry things are so rough right now. We've got a bit of the same going on here with repairs and expenses. I keep reminding myself to be a lily of the field. I also came to the conclusion long ago that God has decided we'll never be rich, but we'll never be truly wanting, either. It seems like each time we have a windfall, a new expense comes up. Conversely, this means each time we have an expense, a new windfall comes up. When I focus on this second way of thinking of it, I'm much more at peace.


Regarding CJ, it may well just be his age. It is hard to remember when you're in the thick of it that kids do outgrow a lot of behavior.


If I may give advice, I'd focus on working with him to come up with constructive things to do when he's bored. Since he's bright, he will be bored sometimes, no matter the school, so even if you change schools and he has a more rigorous academic program, his behavior may not change. Try to really challenge him at home too. (My 8 year old says, "How am I supposed to learn anything at school when you've already taught me it at home? LOL!) If you keep him challenged at home, he may be able to use his new knowledge to ask questions at school and get more engaged there.


Also, it may be the teacher. Some teachers fit some kids better than others. With mine, I just hold my breath and wait for first grade. That's because once school gets more academic, my kids can shine. But in 4K and 5K, the teachers focus on social skills, and I find the teachers at our school in those grades squash creativity and curiousity a bit in favor of learning school rules. I understand why they do that, but my kids are still very much marching to their own drummers at that age, and it causes conflict and confusion.


It is just a tumultous time. Beginning in first grade, and certainly in second, that is water under the bridge. You may find the same thing with CJ. A teacher that "gets" him will make all the difference in his behavior and in how much he is challenged. (There's no reason you can't check out the public schools to see if you think that will solve things. But it could be that no matter the school, time will resolve things.)


Try to take care of yourself. Not feeling well makes everything worse, no doubt. I'll say a prayer.


Polly

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-26-2000
Fri, 06-26-2009 - 6:43am

(((Megan)))


With the exception of the hole that CJ picked in the wall and the fibro, I can relate to most of your post.


Does it help to say "this, too, shall pass"?

 


PJPIIadoration.jpg picture by Kimberly_sahm