Biggest Challenges for 4-5 yos

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2005
Biggest Challenges for 4-5 yos
5
Wed, 10-20-2010 - 4:38pm

Curious to know what you concider to be your biggest challenge at this time with your 4/5 year old. I figure it will be different for each age, so please list your child's gender and age.. and the "biggest" challenge you face with this age!

 

Fall 2010 2

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2005
Wed, 10-20-2010 - 4:41pm

Logan is a boy and he turned 4 September 6th.

For the past 2-3 weeks, the biggest issue has been back talking!!! This is so new to me... its driving me insane. I'm not sure if its a stage or what... but I need to figure out a way to get a handle on it quickly. My child has never been rude or back talked up until now... especially with me!! I tell him that its not appropriate and to not back talk... but thats not really working. I've tried giving him examples of how he could alternatively phrase what he's trying to say (because it used to work before) - no luck - just further back talk. Any suggestions? :D

 

Fall 2010 2

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-01-2003
Sat, 10-23-2010 - 11:56pm
I wish I knew, my son is the same way.

DJ is four and his bday is August 21. My biggest issue with him is he doesn't want to listen to me. And the worst case being when he is told no. So I guess more specificly he acts out when he is told no. It is horrible, and very annoying. I'm not surprised that he has a temper, cause he is his dad's son and my dh has a bad temper. Over the years my dh's temper has been controlled, but I know what it used to be.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2007
Sun, 10-24-2010 - 2:55pm

HI Venus,

I notice a difference in my daughter's behavior every time she has a birthday. It seems to last maybe 6ish weeks and then she's back to normal, but she tests me. I think with every age she is trying to figure out, ok now I'm 4, what are my boundaries now? How is this different from being 3? They feel like a bigger kid now so I think they think that means they should be able to say what they want. Be patient and he will figure it out.

For correcting behavior, I'm not a yeller normally at all, so when I do need that litle tool to get her to listen, just raising my voice usually works. My daughter is also pretty sensitive, so time outs work wonders with her. If she starts to backtalk when I am trying to get her to say brush her teeth, I start counting and she immediately scurries to obey. It's funny because there is nothing negative at the back end. I don't do the, if you don't do it by the time I count to...I just literally start counting, she thinks there's something bad at the other end of the line and she quickly does what she's supposed to do.

MY husband laughs and shakes his head everytime, because it's so simple, but hey, it works and I don't have to punish. :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2005
Mon, 10-25-2010 - 11:11pm
LOL... I will do the counting too.. and sometime Logan will say "mom, don't count!!!!" lol though, in our household, he knows when I get to 3 - I make whatever the request was happen... which he isn't crazy about. (example: you need to get into bed please.. - when I get to three, then I PUT him in bed...) I think this approach works because he likes to do things himself.. and I take away the option. Not really a punishment... but its still effective. :) Can't do that with backtalking though!!!
 

Fall 2010 2

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-27-2010
Thu, 11-04-2010 - 8:50am

I have a 4yr old who turned 4 in July that is a boy and the biggest issue right now is getting him to focus on anything for more then a couple minutes. Even something like going outside to play he's done in 5 minutes and I'm so done with it lol. Eating dinner he eats for about 5 mins then wants to go play. He gets up he gets his food taken away now so he sits there but still don't eat.