Need Advisory for 4yrs-old children

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2004
Need Advisory for 4yrs-old children
6
Fri, 07-18-2008 - 4:40am

My Son 4

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Sat, 07-19-2008 - 1:05pm

Hi and welcome to the board. Your son sounds a lot like many of the 4 yo in Lindsay's preschool class at the beginning of the school year. I think with a little bit of help and guidance from you he will learn the things you want him to.

I have a few suggestions that hopefully will help. I'm not sure what you have tried already so if you have done some of this, I apologize.

How much educational tv does he watch? Shows like Sesame Street, Super Why are entertaining as well as teach. Even Dora, Diego, Little Einsteins would help because the kids on those shows talk clearly. It would be a very big help to him to hear people(other kids) talking in proper sentences. In my Chinese class the teacher recommended that we all watch this children's show that was broadcast in Mandarin so we could get the rhythm of the way it is spoken.

They have preschool workbooks that are fun and you sit with him and work on a couple of pages a day.

Reader Rabbit Preschool (Reader Rabbit Giant Workbooks) by Learning Company Books was one Lindsay has enjoyed. It comes with a cd to be used on the computer that she found fun.

Kumon has a series of books that are geared towards teaching motor skills, letter and number recognition that are also fun.

The Hooked on Phonics company has workbooks as well as their reading system. If you are interested in the reading system, check to see if your local library has them because it can be expensive.

I don't want to forget that one of the best places for kids to have fun learning letters, numbers and other educational stuff is PBSKids.org

One of my fellow cl who is an ESL (English as a Second Language) teacher who would be happy to help you find additional resources to help you and him. If you are interested just let me know and I'll get her email address for you.

I hope what I've typed helps you and did not confuse you. If you want or need me to explain things a different way, I will be happy to do that. I am even happy to look for other resources and ways to help you.

I hope you stick around and join us on the board. We would love to hear how he is doing.

dawn200608.jpg picture by cariadlawn


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2004
Mon, 07-21-2008 - 3:03am

Thank you for your Advice, I was very happy that someone like you reply my problems, I will

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Mon, 07-21-2008 - 9:52pm

Your welcome. There are a lot of people here at iVillage who have wonderful advice and experiences to share. That is what makes this place so nice.

I don't know if there is really a perfect time to study or to do activities to learn new things. A lot of it depends on the individual. Since he is going to nursery school from 1 to 4 pm, I would do the activity books with him in the morning. You don't have to do hours of work, a page or two (front and back) each day is perfectly fine. I read some place that you don't want to work so hard or for so long that they get bored, tired or start to fight you on it. You want to keep it fun.

If you son can play the games by himself and doesn't want you to play with him, keeping an eye on him while he does them is fine. I just won't let him do it for hours at a time. You might want to play with him sometimes and watch the tv shows with him sometimes. You can talk to him about what he saw. If the characters solved a problem on the show you can ask him how he would have handled it. Would he have done something different. I think it was Noggin that use to have a spot between their regular shows that was called "And Then What Happened?" They would ask preschoolers to tell a story that picked up where another one left off. They would show a short cartoon of a famous story -- Goldilocks and the Three Little Bears. Then they would get the child to tell them what happened next and the story would be told with simple animation. One little girl's story was that later Goldilocks came back and apologized to the bears for eating their food and messing up their house. She brought them gifts to make it up to them.

Little kids don't focus well for long periods of time. The nursery schools, preschools and even kindergarten classes switch around between tasks and lessons because of that. When I've helped out in the Kindergarten classes they switched tasks/lessons about every 15 to 20 minutes. 15 to 20 minutes seemed to be the length of time between activities in Lindsay's preschool class as well. Even in the upper grades they don't seem to keep a child on the same task for hours at a time. In first grade I helped out with centers and I was there no more than an hour and a half. They had 4 centers and they moved between the centers every 20 minutes. The extra time was for learning what I would be doing that week, setting it up and then cleaning up. The kids would get an explanation of what they would be doing at each center at the beginning, had about 5 minutes to wrap things up and move on to the next center after the 20 minutes were up.

My son just finished 3rd grade and they were still moving around between sitting on the floor listening to a story, sitting at their desks working, and going to different classes for subjects like science and social studies. I think those classes lasted about 45 minutes. But during those times they were not sitting still focused only on the work. The teacher, gave a short lecture, they'd work on a paper/experiement, they'd talk about it, read something, and then talk some more. They did have times when they were expected to be quiet and work steady on something -- testing was done in a long stretch (start of class till recess) over a two week period. During evaluation times they were expected to work on their writing projects quietly, but there was some wandering around and quiet talking. Even if you look at your tasks at work or at home you have different things you move between otherwise you get bored. The same thing happens with kids.

dawn200608.jpg picture by cariadlawn


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2004
Thu, 07-31-2008 - 11:30am

Hi! Adviser, Thank You very much!


I will read to him some preschool book, and get him read after me as a fun and reward way.


Thank again! I will Try

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2004
Thu, 07-31-2008 - 12:09pm

Hello! Adviser,


my son away after school start to run after his friend and some unties, I keep on ask him come back he just Ignore me I am yelling him to come back him still keep on following his friend, I was so angry and mat I try fill time that goes other direction is work, but some time not work and I reach home I am punishing him and he promise, but still do a same thing after two days. "O"""


That why I ask your Advice about Child Discipline Book.


I'm Sorry! I hope

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Thu, 07-31-2008 - 12:42pm

I like the positive discipline books.

I also am a big believer in talking to your children about what they could do in different situations.

You know you son wants to see his friend and play with his friend. At 4 his impulse control is not very strong, so when he sees his friend, he isn't going to remember that he isn't suppose to run after him to play. Every morning before you walk that way, remind him that he can say hi to his friend but then you need to continue on. Ask him, what are you suppose to do when you see your friend? Are you suppose to run after him? Give him an incentive to not run after his friend and stay with you. Every day you don't run after your friend you will get a star. Once you have 5 stars you get to pick dinner (you give him two choice to pick between), or he gets a small toy car. What ever it is should be something he'd like but small and not elaborate. Maybe it can be a trip to the park on Saturday, or getting to pick. Once he's gone 2 weeks without running after his friend, he gets something a little bit bigger. Does he ever get to have time to play with this friend or has it been a while?

I think I forgot to say you also need to tell him what will happen if he doesn't listen to you. Maybe loses his stories that night or has to go into time out when you get home. You should give reminders and warnings to help him remember what he is suppose to do. However, once he has gone past those reminders (usually 3) he has made the CHOICE to accept the punishment/consequences. You don't get mad, don't yell, just in force the consequences. Remind him that it is his choice and in his control. You do have to make sure that you are consistent and follow through with what you've told him.

dawn200608.jpg picture by cariadlawn