Sharing

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Sharing
4
Fri, 08-23-2013 - 3:55pm

How's your 4/5yr old with sharing?  Landon is the youngest in our family and boy does he struggle.  We had to leave my brother's house the other day because he wouldn't share pool toys with his cousin.  It was totally embarrassing!  

How do your kiddos do?  Any tips for getting them to share better?

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
Fri, 08-23-2013 - 4:06pm

Yes, we do have that problem at home.  I think she is pretty darn good at school, but home with her older sister its a problem.  I think part of it is they always feel like they are in a competition with each other.  I hate to admit it, but we have a lot of duplicate things at our house so they have their own specific stuff...

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Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
In reply to: arryl
Fri, 08-23-2013 - 4:07pm

Yes, we do have that problem at home.  I think she is pretty darn good at school, but home with her older sister its a problem.  I think part of it is they always feel like they are in a competition with each other.  I hate to admit it, but we have a lot of duplicate things at our house so they have their own specific stuff...

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-12-2003
Sat, 08-24-2013 - 8:28am

Our sharing issues start with my oldest. He was the only kid for 5 years so everything was his until his baby brother showed up. So one year on his birthday he enacted a rule his brother couldn't play with a new toy for 6 months. His birthday is in July his brothers September so I said fine because it works both ways knowing all too well what would happen a few months later. I was rght but we let the rule stand. I mean I get it its new and especially if its something you had been waiting for and if it gets broken its all your fault.

Now its not perfect by any means. My 4 year old defination of new is very vague. If its something he hadn't play with in ages and found and well then its new again to him which causes some battles. My oldest will use new toys as bribes. If he wants to be left alone he lets him play with something on the condition he doesn't bother him. Well that creates other issues.

Think every family with more then 1 has these issues. I know both my sister and SIL kids fight over toys so when with cousins its no different. I do allow that one special toy tht NO ONE else can play with but that also mean when cousins are over or we are going some place and it maybe an issue either that toy stays behind or they have to understand that rule is in effect only between you 2 at my house. Usually the need to protect the sacred toy wins and it stays in the room safe from sharing. As for when its an issue of someone else's toy thats when their sharing rules comes to play. A nice reminder well you would feel the same about your toys and when all else fails removing from the situation. Course if you all have to leave its not fair but if there is anyway to just remove the kid with the share info. I know 4 is young but eventually if can't play at counsin but his siblings can it may sink in I have to play fair or I can't go. Course I have a terror of a 7 year old nephew. Since 5 my mom has excluded him from activities if he can't behave but it doesn't phase him so its full proof either.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Tue, 08-27-2013 - 3:07pm
I'm glad I'm not alone! I know it is a pretty normal behavioral issue, but the tantrum he threw was just over the top! Part of the problem we have is that being the youngest in our house, all he has to do is scream and his brothers will give him whatever he wants to get him to stop. That doesn't always work with other kids! It's a fun stage for sure. LOL!