need help please

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2004
need help please
5
Fri, 02-13-2009 - 4:39pm
Sorry, this is kind of long, but I would really appreciate any help anyone can give me. I've been trying to potty train my 3yo son for over 8 months now with no sucess. He knows when he has to go potty because if we are out at a resturant he will usually tell us he has to go. We take him to the bathroom and he will go. But he throws a fit at home if I try to get him to use the potty. He wil refuse to go, or will tell me he went last week. I try to tell him we have to go every day. I've tried putting him in the thick training underpants with the plastic over and he does not care if he wets them. He will only care if he is soaked through and his pants get wet. I've made him take his dirty cloths off and put new underwear and pants on and nothing works. I've tried having him stand in the tub and use lukewarm/cool water to clean him up explaining that if he went on the potty he wouldn't have to do that. Nothing works. He does use the potty once in a while at home but not on a consistent basis. He does have an older brother 8yo and has seen him go but doesn't care. I also have a 6 month old at home. We've done the regular underwear, Santa brought special big boy underwear and everything. I'm at my witts end right now. I've ended up going back to pull ups since I odn't know what else to do. Please does anyone have any suggestions. I am a total loss. Even tried a reward chart, if he goes so many times on the potty I will take him to Chucke Cheese which he has been asking for. Still makes no diference.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-28-2005
Fri, 02-13-2009 - 8:43pm
Wow I would be frustrated too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2004
Sun, 02-15-2009 - 9:55pm

gigglieone28, Hi and welcome to the Toilet Teaching board.

The process of potty training can be frustrating, when you get to that point it is best to take a step back for a few days, and then restart. My suggestion would be start smaller with the rewards. For example each times he uses the potty for the first week he gets some coins to put into his bank. Money can be a great motivator. And if he goes X amount of times in a week he will get a whole dollar. Then move up from there. Balloons, Thomas Trains, and game time were favorites here, and then we ended with a trip to Chuck E Cheese.

I agree with the previous poster, keep his in underwear as that is when he seems to notice more. After an accident have your DS help clean up. Have him rinse out his clothes, and put them in the washer and then get himself dressed. I hope that helps. Please keep us updated on your DS progress.

Photobucket

Photobucket
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 02-18-2009 - 4:16pm

As he is over 3 years of age,and is being very stubborn,may I suggest the 3 strikes method?


I have used this for many years and have only had a few it backfired on,and most will train pretty quick.


Right after clean-up in the morning,let him know that he is going to get only three pair of underwear for the day,and have around 6 pair of plastic pants ready,right after the first pair of underwear gets wet or dirty,the next pair are worn with plastic pants over them,the same with the second pair,but if the third pair are wet or messed,he will only have the plastic pants to wear for the rest of the day,then start fresh the next day.


Once he finds out you are serious and consistent,it should not be long before he finds this to be not so comfy.


Please keep us up-dated on how this goes if you wish to try it.


Many Blessings.


Mac

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-08-2004
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 8:38am
With the three strike method do you use regular underwear or traning underwear? What do you do when they refuse to use the potty. I've tried setting a timer, got him a potty watch and everything. He will only use the potty when he wants to.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 02-19-2009 - 4:05pm

This is quite normal,he has it figured out that he does not have to stop playing to use the potty,mom will just change me when "I" am ready.


I would start off using the lighter pants when at home or short trip out,and the thicker ones when going to be sometime away.Just be sure he knows he will only have the three pair of cloth pants for the day,wether they are light or heavy style,he could be spending most of the day in plastic pants.


You might also try calling the plastic pants,panties,you never know how boys will take this,all he has to do to stop wearing panties,is use the potty.


I hope this helps a bit more.


Many Blessings.


Mac