Oh, the behaviors!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Oh, the behaviors!
5
Mon, 04-02-2012 - 3:31pm

Tantrums. Running from me. Crying over everything. Kicking. Scratching. Throwing himself on the ground.

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 10:29am
Oh yes!!! I have said lately, my 2 1/2 year old is firmly stuck in her temper tantrum stage. Its been horrible the last few months in general, we spend more time fighting about any and everything, she doesn't like the outfit I picked out for her, she wants to put it on herself, she can't put it on and screams for me to help her, she doesn't like the glass I put her milk in, the list goes on and on!! It amazes me that the daycare ladies describe her as such a little angel and at home, I am pulling my hair out constantly with her.

I have been working on a cross between the 1 2 3 Magic and the super nanny time outs that the daycare suggested and we are making progress. She's responding to the counting and warnings better and there are less tantrums overall, but we definitely have a long way to go!
Hugs to you!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-13-2007
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 1:38pm

You're definitely not alone! I don't know why these phases go the way they do, but they're miserable. I've noticed for mine, that my kids tend to have more tantrums when they need one-on-one attention from me and/or their dad. DH works a lot, and they usually just see him for an hour or so in the evenings, and then about half the day on the weekends. Recently, he made time to take DD out for a cheap ice cream cone. She talked his ear off the whole time (she's 4) and the tantrums went way down after that. My DS (nearly 2) loves to sit and read books or go for a walk, just him and one parent. Having a little time alone with one or the other of us really helps sometimes. (But not immediately -- not like a reward for throwing a tantrum or a bribe to stop.)

Oh, and my SIL says that her kids act up more right before they learn some new skill or reach a goal. She thinks the frustration of being almost able to do something makes them hard to manage. Then, when they break through and figure it out, the crankiness subsides. I like that idea, but I don't always know just what my children are working on......

Siggy 5
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 4:45pm
Tracy,

Sorry you are dealing with it too! Isn't it frustrating when you hear how well behaved they are for others? I mean, I'm glad they can hold it together when at school or other places, but why can't they show that side a little at home? ;) I've heard nothing but good things about 1 2 3 magic. I keep meaning to check it out from the library- I think now I'll actually follow through!

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2008
Thu, 04-05-2012 - 4:47pm
Hi Libby,

I think you make a good point about the acting out when they are in need of one-on-one time. I just wish there were more of me to split up so I could give more of it! My son acts out most when everyone is home and (I think) he's feeling left out. I guess negative attention is still attention, right?

Interesting about your SIL's idea. I'll have to keep my eye out for any new emerging skills!

Community Leader
Registered: 07-26-1999
Sat, 04-07-2012 - 5:34pm
I agree on more of you to split for everyone, it is so hard to give everybody that individual attention they never at times. The middle one is the one that acts out the most when she needs individual time, she seems to get lost in the shuffle too often unfortunately. a friend of mine actually told me to watch, once my oldest goes off to college in a little over a year, the little ones will be munch more behaved, he said that whether I realize it or not, they know that I am doing I can to spend that extra time with her before she leaves for college, and once it's one less person I need to spread my attention too, things will get better, but like you said, right now. Any attention, even negative attention works do them.
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