Worried and at my wits end!!!! please help!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2008
Worried and at my wits end!!!! please help!
4
Wed, 01-12-2011 - 10:00pm

Hi everyone my name is Rania and I have a 23month old DS who is a handful to say the least.... here's a little background on him: He can be the sweetest most affectionate little boy. He hates seeing people hurt... if I stub my toe, etc and wince, he is all over me making sure I'm ok. He is very smart for his age and extremely aware. Currently, I work from home but have my mom come over to help watch him so he's not in daycare yet. He pretty much co-sleeps with DH and me simply because we fell into this trap early on and can't get out of it.

Here is what has me worried the most:

When he's having a tantrum, which occurs about 10 times a day, whenever he doesn't get what he wants he gets EXTREMELY violent. He throws things, slams doors, and the worst thing is he hits himself across the face so much and so hard. When he is frustrated with us, he will also hit us. He even gets to the point where he gags himself and makes himself throw up. We've tried "ignoring" it and walking away, that doesnt work, and makes it worse. We've tried being stern and telling him not to hit himself or others, but again, that doesn't work. What do we do? Is this normal???? I brought it up months ago to the pediatrician and he said it was and for us to just ignore him when he acts up...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-15-2007
Wed, 01-12-2011 - 11:27pm

I'm so sorry - this has to be so hard on you and on him!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-06-2008
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 7:43am
Thank you for taking the time to read my entire post LOL and giving your thoughts. I think I will bring it back up to the pediatrician... I KNOW part of how he reacts has to do with DH and me since we both (were) can be pretty short tempered. My mom says I exhibited a lot of DS's rage, but I never hit myself really or others that much. SIGHHH, WHY IS PARENTING SO HARD?!?!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2010
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 11:26am

Most misbehavior from my 2yo is from being tired, hungry, or bored.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2005
Thu, 01-13-2011 - 3:08pm

I would consider seeing another doctor if yours can't give you any useful advice. It does sound like its excessive - I would be concerned as well over the violent reactions....

As far as the sleeping goes... I have had to do the Super Nanny approach periodically with Logan. He goes through stages where he will tantrum at bedtime.. but I found that if I sat outside of his room so he could see me but kept my back to him and didn't respond to him, he'd calm down after a few minutes and watch me. Eventually he'd fall asleep. Each night I'd move a little farther down the hallway - until I could stop doing it and he'd go to bed on his own. He would ask "Mom, can you sit in the hallway tonight?" lol.. it was cute.. and it was a HUGE stress saver. I HATE stressful bedtime. Its one of the few things I have a lack of patience for. If he got out of bed, I would calmly pick him, put him back in bed and say "good night Logan, I love you" and then go back to sit. If you try this - I suggest if you try this.. have an activity planned for yourself that you can do for up to 20 minutes or longer. LOL I would knit.. or read a magazine.

 

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