Disclosing

Community Leader
Registered: 08-01-2002
Disclosing
2
Fri, 10-25-2013 - 10:47pm

So I finally told my son that he is a DI baby. It didn't come out the way I had planned though. He was being a snotty teenager and told me that I was not his mom. I was not in the mood to deal with that attitude. Too top it off DH was being a jerk. So I told him fine you don't have to have me for a mom. But it didn't stop there. I then went on to say that his dad wasn't his real dad. The first thing he said was you cheated on him.  So I clearified that right away. I explained that I used a sperm donor.  He thought I was lying at first so I showed him this board. Then he said he wants to find his real dad. I am now trying to explain that isn't possible. It went better than I thought it would, but like I said not the way I would have wanted to tell him.  I hate the teenage years!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-23-2012
Mon, 10-28-2013 - 10:42am

Wow!!  Thanks for sharing your story!  DH and I have already decided that we absolutely will tell our child (God willing) about their genetic makeup.  But it's so hard thinking about when the right time is.  We want to tell them when they're old enough to understand, but young enough that they won't be angry for not telling them sooner.

How old is your son?  I hope he is able to find peace knowing that he has a mom and a dad who love him VERY much and who gave so much to have him in their lives! 

Community Leader
Registered: 08-01-2002
Wed, 10-30-2013 - 6:07pm
He is 13. He is taking it OK. He wants me to take him to the Dr. where I he was conceived so he can ask who his dad is. I told him it doesn't work like that.
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