FET then Donor - Donor and FET at same time - Donor and stim Me?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-06-2010
FET then Donor - Donor and FET at same time - Donor and stim Me?
17
Wed, 10-06-2010 - 11:56pm

(cross posted on IVF board)

Ahhh decisions, decisions - went to NEW RE today who was AWESOME - seemed so much more caring and invested in the process and the end result - a BABY.

He was really worried about why I've had such a high number of embryos make it to blast and still not implant - or even give me a chemical pregnancy.

Rachel (39), DH (38), 10 year old daughter adopted from Russia 2 failed IUI, 3 failed fresh IVF (2-5 day, 1-3 day) contemplating donor IVF/donor combo me IVF

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2005

Wow, that's a tough decision to make, for sure!

I sort of like the idea of doing the FET along w/ donor ... but it does seem to me that if it's a uterine issue, that needs to somehow be sorted out before doing any cycle.

 


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Registered: 02-11-2008

That's a tough call.

Isabel
Mom to Sebastian Robert after 3+ years of infertility

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Registered: 06-30-2005

Rachel,

I agree that this would be a difficult decision. But I wonder about the uterine issue as well. It doesn't seem to be an egg quality issue but an implantation one. I have been having the same issue and I used donor eggs. My RE has been focusing on "repairing" my uterus to encourage good implantation so I guess I would ask more about that. Also, I think I would try the frozen embryos first (after understanding the uterine issue) and then if that doesn't work move on to donor because it would seem emotionally difficult to process that you might be carrying your own eggs/child or the donor's - I mean it is really something to think about. And if the issue is uterine related then you would have spent a lot of extra money on donor eggs and perhaps not even needed it. Maybe I am misunderstanding but bottom line is I would first understand is it really the quality of eggs or the uterus that is most likely the problem?

Carolyn

Too many IUI’s, IVF’s and failed attempts to count.

TTC #1 since 2005
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Registered: 10-06-2010
Grrr - now new RE isn't sure he wants to let me in the 80% money back program without getting another HSG to make sure that it is not fluid filled tubes that is causing issue and another test to see the inside of my uterus. I see a little the reasoning behind the HSG but I just had laprascopy on tubes in February - they were just covered with adhesions from PID - nothing about fluid.

And even then he was not sure he can "afford" to take me on and kept suggesting surrogacy. He thinks I should have had at least a chemical pregnancy w/all my IVFs (only 3) - I've seen ladies on this board w/more IVFs that never get a positive until 5+ times down the road - or when they move to DE - right??

I thought before it was because RE cared and was perplexed by our situation - but now I feel like it is just he doesn't want to have to give $$ back so he is going to make me repeat a bunch of tests that current RE has done/or doesn't feel are necessary. Am I wrong here??

He would be $2-3k more than current RE - has slightly lower %% of success - and if he doesn't let me into the $$ back program I'm wondering what is the point in switching. . . . Just when I convince DH to go a certain way, settle everything in my mind, etc.

Sorry for the long rant. . . any thoughts from you wonderful ladies taking the time to read my ramblings?
Rachel
Rachel (39), DH (38), 10 year old daughter adopted from Russia 2 failed IUI, 3 failed fresh IVF (2-5 day, 1-3 day) contemplating donor IVF/donor combo me IVF
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Registered: 03-17-2008

I think what your DR is looking for is a hydrosalpinx

Franklin and Callan

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-29-2005
I think it does make sense to try to figure out whether there's something anatomically wrong w/ your uterus/tubes before doing a cycle, but I'm not sure whether it makes sense to just repeat what's already been done. I'm not sure why you switched from one doctor to this one, but you're right, if you can't get into a more advantageous program, maybe switching doesn't make sense.

I'm sorry I don't have any terrific advice, but I'm sending lots of P&PTs your way! ((((hugs))))

 


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Registered: 06-30-2005

Rachel,

I know from personal experience that different doctors like to do their own tests and make their own conclusions on diagnoses. I have had to do multiple tests several times because we are now on our 3rd clinic. It is reasonable that this RE wants to have these tests performed by his practice because he wants to draw his own conclusions and he might find something different from your current RE. It is frustrating for you who has been through enough tests and has been poked and everything else to have to go through this again. I completely understand where you are coming from and it sucks. I was lucky with the HSG because my gynecologist did it so she was neutral and all the RE's accepted her findings and I pushed back hard when they asked me to do THAT again (the HSG was the worst thing I've done thus far). I can understand why this RE wants to make his own conclusions when offering a money back guarantee also, I mean he has a business and a bottom line to look out for. I would not interpret it as you are a hopeless case but just someone protecting his business and reputation.

I am sorry because this is probably not what you want to hear right now but if you really want to try a new RE and this is your only other option then I would seriously consider doing what he wants if he is willing to offer you the money back guarantee. Is the only reason you want to switch the money back guarantee? If so, I agree don't switch unless you are just not happy with your current RE. I am sorry you have to be in this position. Good luck!

Carolyn

Too many IUI’s, IVF’s and failed attempts to count.

TTC #1 since 2005
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008

Rachel,

I have a question for you. Today I visited with my RE and I told him that we wanted to use one of our embryos made with DH and transfer that one along with the one made with sperm from DS. He told me that because of ASRM guidelines he could not do it. He said he could only transfer one or the other; it makes no sence. So in other words I have to choose donor sperm eggs or the ones created with DH. I see your RE is willing to do your eggs and the donor at the same time so this is really confusing. So upset right now, how do I know if this doctor is telling me the truth. I just sent an email to ASRM to see if that is true. Maybe doctors who are not a part of ASRM do not hav to follow that.

jane

IVF#1 March 2010 GonalF, Cetrotide, Menopur.
23 follicles 19 eggs 13 mature 7 fertilized 2 blasts none to freeze. No Pregnancy.
IVF#2 July 2010 Lupron Gonal F Menopur
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Registered: 10-06-2010
Hmmm I don't know - my current RE never told me about this option - just the new potential one - yikes if it is not under guidelines that might tell me even more about this potential new RE. . . .
Rachel (39), DH (38), 10 year old daughter adopted from Russia 2 failed IUI, 3 failed fresh IVF (2-5 day, 1-3 day) contemplating donor IVF/donor combo me IVF
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-14-2008

I am going to find the right anwser. Like I said I contacted ASRM directly because

IVF#1 March 2010 GonalF, Cetrotide, Menopur.
23 follicles 19 eggs 13 mature 7 fertilized 2 blasts none to freeze. No Pregnancy.
IVF#2 July 2010 Lupron Gonal F Menopur

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