Hi, is anyone watching Oprah?
I agree, I can't help but feel this is a negative show in the sense of the parents who choose to get pg with donor egg/sperm....they aren't portraying the whole picture
I never watch any of these shows and each time Oprah does it, I love more respect for her.
Walk a mile in our shoes FIRST then you can talk about it!
I was really looking forward to watching the Oprah special (which I recorded) when I got home from work today. But I must admit that I had some big problems with the show as well. First, it seemed like the children kept saying that one of the main issues was not having a complete medical history. Since they were conceived 18 years ago, I'm sure thats probably very true. I can't speak for all of the banks, but the ones I have looked into provide VERY thorough medical histories of not just the donor, but his siblings, his parents, his parents siblings, his grandparents, etc. Why wasn't that ever mentioned? And I'm sure that the it is true that there may be as many as 60+ children from one donor out there, as mentioned by the sibling registry lady. However, things aren't the same as they were 15 or 20 years ago. Things are monitored much more closely now. Why wasn't that ever menioned?
And the thing that I was the most concerned about was the fact that there were three men on the show who had donated sperm and all of them were developing relations with their offspring. Does anyone else seem to think that portrays a very incorrect one sided view of things? Maybe its just me, but the idea of letting some stranger into my child's life while they are young and fragile, just seems so scary. I am open to the idea of children seeking out donors when they come of age. But the lady who is letting her 13 year old son develop a relationship with his donor just seems to be taking such a huge risk with her son's well-being. I mean what if the guy suddenly decides he doesn't want a relationship anymore? Or turns out to be some kind of wierdo? And does developing this relationship put the donor at risk for child support issues, since the child isn't of age yet?
All in all I am not very happy with what I saw. It certainly didn't seem to be an accurate picture of the situation to me.
I really wish she had included the opinion of a loving father (not bio) and how he felt about his child yearning for their donor (I can't even make myself say bio dad, yuck).
I took to heart though what the girls were saying on stage. I noticed (or it seemed to me) that the "moms" seemed to be only single moms. I want to be a single mom. But it creeps the heck out of me that the moms kept calling the donors DAD...even some of the girls on stage called him DAD. My donor won't ever be my child's DAD. I have some info (for the time being) on his medical history. I have some childhood pics of him, too. Maybe as my kid gets older he/she will want to know more, I'm not sure, but I plan on being open about the subject for the best interest to my kid!
What I did love was the brother/sister reuinion! OMG tears!!!! How wonderful for them! And my gawd they looked like twins!!! I'd rather wish that on my child than to find the donor!
A poll then...
Would you ever contact your donor? Be it egg or sperm?
And not a thank you note but actual contact...
I wouldn't...to me it is MUCH different mentally than adoption.
Especialy sperm - I mean come on, to be honest here, I am VERY grateful for the donors VERY.
But compared to egg donors, how involved are they really?
They are usually young men in college looking for beer or car money, or maybe book money. They get a little blood drawn for some tests and then they look at some videos three times a week and make sure they aim for the cup.
How frikking hard is that? They actually ENJOY their donations.
It is actually much easier than giving blood for crimeney's sake!
Now egg donors to me are a bit different, because it is so much more involved. And I think to a degree much more of a gift, if that makes sense.
I am SO glad I didn't watch it! And I need to type better - I meant I LOSE respect for Oprah when she does shows like this.
Hi Ladies -
Well, once again, Oprah managed to put a negative spin on DI.
*** Joiseygoil ***
We're doing anonymous DE, so knowing who she is really isn't an option. If it were to become one in the future, I would not pursue it. The whole "other-Mom" issue is a hang-up for me w/adoption, which is one of the reasons we're opting to do DE.
One IVF w/PGD - BFN
Thinking of doing IVF w/DE in 2008
Tracy, 28 - FXS Carrier/POF