I'm having *another* hard day.
DH feels sad about my destroying the book, because he associated it with happy times in our relationship.
I'm trying not to give up the dream, but it's hard.
Let me just say I 100% know where you are coming from. There are certainly days (or even weeks) that I cry every day. Worse is when the sadness of IF adds itself to the emotions your meds cause. This entire cycle I have cried. I have been more depressed and more upset now then I have been in a while. It gets bad, and I suppose the bad days I have no idea how I will get through it.
I know it sounds cheesey but a lot of the reason I can get through it is from the ladies here. It is nice to come on here and go "I cried all day today for no reason" and have people completely understand the reason. Sometimes it is knowing that you do not know what tomorrow brings. Things for us IFers can change in a moment. I always believe that we have to let ourself cry. Let yourself have the bad days. Sometimes I feel like when I allow my heart and mind to grieve I do better.
As to your family, I am sorry you are having such a hard time. I find my mother, although meaning well, tends to make the "just relax" comments. Or comments like "I feel like this year is your year". Which of course just adds to the pressure. I mostly change the subject, I will lead the conversation away. It is a shame that they put less value to a couple then a 'family'. Is there any chance to talk to your family about how you are feeling? If not sometimes I feel the best thing to do is come here and vent. We do understand and sometimesw that is what you need.
I hope that your days are getting easier and know that we are all here to support you.
"Even miracles take a little time." ~ Fairy Godmother: Cinderella
TTC since April 2009
Frustrated with family again!
We are tired of hearing "it will all just work out".
I am sorry you are going through this pain. IF does rob us of all the things that should happen natrually. It carries a pain that no one can understand unless you have experienced it first hand. It is hard to stay positive when there is so much negative surrounding IF and treatments. I have been going through this for 9 years and it does not get any easier over time. I have experienced every emotion possible and then some. The biggest blow was when we finally got the BFP and lost it 7 weeks later. I think for me I just have become numb to a lot of the pain and accepting that I may not ever have another child. It does help when
Me ~ 31 DH ~ 33 TTC #1 since August 2002. Dealing with mild Endo, PCOS, D