Cycle is a bust

Looks like I am going to have to count myself out this cycle. My body is just not cooperating at all. I have been spotting for the past several days with no sign of O. It reminds me of the spotting I went through with my M/C. Its so frustrating that this just cannot be easier. I am just going to leave it in Gods hands anymore and what will be will be. I am losing energy on this whole IF crap. To go 9 years and having nothing but 1 M/C. I am a loving mother and all I want is to complete my family. I do not think that is much to ask. I am going to be 33 in a few months and every year that passes just gets harder and harder to deal with. What's harder is knowing I had it in my grasps to only lose it. I try not to think about it but all the pregnant women I see just reminds me of what I do not have. I am very grateful for my DD. My DH is a great father to her but I know he wants a biological child and to experience the