Just need to vent...

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-10-2007
Just need to vent...
Thu, 10-15-2009 - 9:44pm

Hi ladies,

I'm having one of those days and I just needed to vent to some people that actually know what it's like to go through all this drama. 

I got my period yesterday, even though I was sure I was pregnant.  I had all the physical symptoms and even felt a little different...I had a pregnancy test scheduled for this coming Monday.  I even waited until yesterday to make the pregnancy test appointment because I didn't want to jinx myself by calling too early to make it.  So the same day I make the appointment, I get my period.

I just hate feeling defeated and have gotten to the point of complete frustration.  We have been trying for a year and half with no luck at all.  Finally went on Clomid last month and decided to try one more month on our own.  We'll try IUI this next time around.  I know it may sound silly, but I just really wanted to do this the old-fashioned way...yes, I know I'm not alone :-)  I guess moving on to IUI makes me feel like we failed in some stupid way and have to resort to "help".

I've been trying to stay positive and even told my hubby last time around that we were going to think positive because I "will" get pregnant.  I kept saying it to myself and it lifted my spirits a bit, but my spirits have been far from lifted in a long time.  The tests, the hormones, the doctor appointments, the disappointment...  I don't know.  I feel really bad for my husband because I am so hormonal all the time - my mood swings are crazy and I find myself snapping at him more and more. 

Anyway, I just needed to get some of this stuff off my chest.  I hope all of you are doing well and are having better luck than I am :-)

Take care, Maureen


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Fri, 10-16-2009 - 8:34am


I am sorry that AF showed up. Unfortunately she always seems to show for me right when I start to think about taking a PG test too.

I completely understand what you are saying about it happening the old fashioned way & feeling like a failure when you have to move on to IUI.

This road is full of ups & downs and I am so glad that I can come here to vent and I also like being able to help support other women going thru the same struggles.

So vent away that's why we are here.

I hope your journey on this road is ending soon and an IUI will be just the ticket to get you to a BFP:)


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2009
Fri, 10-16-2009 - 3:54pm

Hugs Maureen! Vent away, that is what we are here for. We get it, we understand just how you feel. IF just plain sucks. I really hope this journey ends soon for you as you move to IUI. I know it is hard feeling like you aren't doing things the "natural" way but once you have your baby you won't even think twice about how it happened!



I'm 38, DH is 42 and we are TTC #1. We've had 3 unexplained miscarriages and a bout with Asherman's Syndrome but we're determined.

BFP #4! - 1/
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2007
Sun, 10-18-2009 - 7:30pm


My DH and I have been down your road. We dealt with IF for 8 LONG years.