Not a good day

Today my primary dr finally put a referral in for a fertility specialist. Absolutely breaks my heart that 8 months later we still haven't been able to conceive. A little about myself I am 20 and have a son from a previous relationship I had when I was 16. My husband also has 2 children from his previous marriage. I'm starting to lose all hope I will be able to have a child wih my husband and it's affecting me very negatively. I try so hard to forget about it but the more I try the more pregnancy and babys is shoved down my throat. And the few people who know we are having trouble conceiving make it seem like I'm exagurating being so upset. I know I have a child and am so thankful for him but I feel such a deep need to have a child with my husband. More and more I am seeing people I grew up with have baby's and live off of welfare or just not take care of their baby in general. Yet here i am completely self sufficient and have all means to nurture and care for my child but nothing. Sorry for going on and on I'm just in desperate need of someone who understands. Im an emotional wreck and am losing the strength to hold myself together