When will the torture stop?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-07-2008
When will the torture stop?
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 9:50am

Hello Ladies,

I know I haven't been around much.  Work is a little hectic with a Manuscript on my research due at the end of this week.  YIKES.  But I am thinking of you all all the time.  I pray for each one of us to finally see the happy ending to this awful journey.

Anyway, I just have to say IF sucks, and I am tired of all the reminders it gives us.  My little BIL called last night.  As soon as I heard his voice I knew what the news was.  The are expecting again!  Their first just turned one in July.  They are due in May.  I was fine with it... at least this year he didn't call on Christmas day to tell us this.  Actually last night I could care less as long as he doesn't take my baby names and does ask us to be God parents.  This is the BIL some of you might remember that named their Dog Daisy.  We had Daisy picked as our daughters name.  Then with their first child they took the name Emil (DHs grandfathers name) which we were going to name our son's middle name.  And what burned us was BIL knew DH wanted to used grandpa's name.   

This am I started my usual 12DPO spotting indicating AF will be here in 2-4 days.  So now my heart is just sinking with BIL news. 

Well back to my writing.  Love and P&PT to all of you.



Baby Dust

"Keep your face to the sunshine and you cannot see the shadows" - Helen Keller

DH (34) and me (33).  Been together since March 1994, Married in September 1999.  TTC since November 2001. 

DX:  Graves Disease->hypothyroidism and functional ovarian cysts or unexplained ovarian dystfunction.  BW: CD3 FSH 9.8, LH 3.4, estradial <10.  CD21 Progesterone: 9.9.  DH DX:  can seed an army.  Last SA was 70mil/mL with 60% motility.

Rx:  Femara/ovidrel/IUI, Acupuncture, TCM fertility diet and soon Reiki.
Suppliments: prenatals, EPO (CD1-->O) , baby asprin (CD21--->), fish oil

Currently: Good Ole Fashioned Lovin and Praryers lots of prayers.




iVillage Member
Registered: 07-30-2009
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 10:29am
Ugh, Terri I'm so sorry. Sending major amounts of virtual hugs to you!



I'm 38, DH is 42 and we are TTC #1. We've had 3 unexplained miscarriages and a bout with Asherman's Syndrome but we're determined.

BFP #4! - 1/
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2006
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 10:52am


Big hugs to you.

PG announcements are never easy but coming from that BIL I am sure was a little tougher to hear.

Darn spot &

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-13-2009
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 12:19pm

I'm sorry to hear that. It sure is tough hearing that people are expecting their second or even third when you are still ttc #1 and then to add fuel to the fire to use the names that you wanted.

I too spot 9 - 12 dpo and know how depressing it is, but I try to tell myself every month that it is implantation bleeding and I hope that this will be the case sometime soon.

My SIL has had 3 kids in the past 8 years and one of them turned to my DH the other day and said "when are you gonna grow kids? there are no kids around here anymore"

So I'm praying for you and all the other ladies on this IF board that we all grow babies soon!


iVillage Member
Registered: 06-26-2007
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 1:39pm

I am so sorry to hear about that! It is torture to be struggling with your own fertility challenges but then all around us it seems like everyone else gets p/g right away.

From looking at your siggy I am in the pretty much same boat right now. We tried some treatments but I was getting so stressed out from it that now we are back to au naturale. I was doing acupuncture for the last 3 months but have decided to give that a break also. There are so many possible TCM and herbal things to try out there for IF that going the alternative route is almost as confusing as conventional medicine!

I don't have any good words of advice :) But wanted you to know that not everyone is getting p/g right away and we will overcome this eventually!

TTC #1 since September 2006 (Me - 30, DH - 32)

January 2008 - Chemical P/G, April 2008 - M/C at about 7 weeks, June 2008 - Blighted Ovum

May 2009 - diagnosed Low Protein S and Hetero MTHFR - Baby aspirin and Folgard, Lovenex

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-31-2008
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 1:53pm

(((BIG HUGS))) Terri!

Sorry you had to deal with this announcement from BIL.


TTC since 6/2007. 
IVF #1 Jan 2009 - BFN
IVF# 2  April 2009 - BFN
IVF# 3 July

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2008
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 3:22pm
Oh, I'm sorry, sweetie. I hope they don't pick your names. That happened with one of my friends. She took the boy name that DH and I had settled on years ago. I don't think she did it intentionally, but I know I must have mentioned it to her at some point. The thing that was annoying was that DH and I had a very hard time agreeing on a boys name.
Looking forward to meeting you next week! And we'll understand if you're a little grumpy- we'll eat lots of yummy food and definitely have dessert!



Mason James was born 8/21/10, 8lbs 12 oz after close to 3 years of infertility.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2009
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 5:12pm

Terri, this is for you and all the rest of the ladies with stories about name stealing. I think you should name your kid whatever you choose. Even if it means naming the kid the same damn name...say I won't! It would serve the other person right for naming their kid the name you picked out.



DH and I are 33yrs old. TTC #1 since May08| July09- Dx POF|  Aug09- started Premarin, Metformin, and Lupron

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 6:50pm

That sucks and I will pray they don't take a name you like. Even though I'm pregnant I still hate hearing about other preggos who get knocked up without a hitch. Just learned that my cousin is having her FIFTH baby at age 42!! And there I was told by RE that my IF problem was probably age related at age 33.........It's not a good feeling.

Hugs and hang on tight. You will get there someday soon.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-06-2004
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 7:51pm
I am so sorry that you are going through this at such a busy time with work too.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-07-2009
Mon, 10-26-2009 - 8:11pm
((((Hugs)))) I think finding out people in the family are pregnant is the worst. A few months ago I found out my 18 year old cousin got his girlfriend pregnant and I had to sit at a b-day party for his little brother while they were literally gushing about how excited they were. I wanted to throw up. I'll never understand why some people can conceive so easily and we struggle so much. I'm sorry you have to deal with yet another baby on the way. I'll be H&P that you get your bfp soon!

Me- 31, DH- 31; TTC #1 since Nov. '07; No known FI issues; DH has borderline/low motility
IUI #1 on Apr. 25--BFN; IUI #2 on May 22-- BFN; IUI#3 on June 19--BFN; IUI#4 on July 17--BFN; IUI#5 on Aug. 12--BFN; IUI#6 (clomid/menopur combo, 3 follicles) on October 20-- BF?



ttc first

happily married