ToTell People or Not To Tell People

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
ToTell People or Not To Tell People
14
Wed, 03-12-2008 - 6:29pm

I've begun to tell friends and relatives that I'm having trouble getting pregnant and am beginning treatment and the reaction has been mostly not what I've been expecting. I e-mailed a good friend and she has not written back (and trust me, she checks e-mail 10 times a day - she lives in Europe so I can't easily call her). I told my brother and all he said (again, via e-mail - he too is in Europe) is "I see." Another friend flat out ignored my problem and started ranting and raving about her own. We had a big fight about her selfishness but she never really apologized so now we're pretending like I never said anything. I actually do have a friend who had fertility problems, but now she is pregnant and I get the feeling that talking about what she went through really rains on her happy parade. She will engage me about the tests and treatments involved but not about the emotional pain. I guess she doesn't want to remember, and I can't blame her. The bottom line is that I am feeling SO ALONE. Thank God for this board, but I wish I could meet you all in person, you know? So what do you think, is it better not to tell people? It's like they can't deal. But then I wish they would friggin' stop asking me when I'm going to start a family every five seconds - "so when are you guys going to have a baaaaby?" So sick of that question!!!!!!!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2007
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 5:14pm

Hi, well I am going to repeat a little from previous post.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Fri, 03-21-2008 - 7:27pm

Thank you for sharing your story, Suzie!


I don't know you but am certainly rooting for you. I think you are right that most people you tell will pray for you, and I believe that all their positive energy will help. But we must beware of people who give misguided advice or friends who are competitive - I have a friend whom I think is kind of hoping I

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2007
Sat, 03-22-2008 - 10:37am

Caren,


I just can't struggle in silence anymore, plus I am lucky to be surrounded by amazing people.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2008
Sat, 03-22-2008 - 4:16pm

You are lucky to be surrounded by such great people. I know that their support must mean the world to you!


Thanks for sharing your story.


Best wishes,


Caren

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