New to IVF...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2004
New to IVF...
Fri, 08-30-2013 - 5:45pm

New to IVF.... not IF Cry

Super long story...

I was married before and had MF IF. We were unable to get past me wanting to be a mom and him not wanting to spend whatever it took to get there.

We ended our marriage after 4 years of TTC.


I remarried... DH and I have been TTC for a couple of years. We tried 2 iui's a year ago both were BFN....

We kind of put it on the back burner for a while and I was personally trying to give up the dream of being a mom. DH has a 9 yr old son that lives with us part time, so I was just going to spoil the heck out of him even more. DH came to me a couple of months ago and told me he made a apt with a RE, that was the best in Indiana. We saw the RE and he suggested a lap/hystroscopy. I am very anti surgery...and honestly scarred something would be wrong with me and I feared hearing I would never be able to be a mom  :( I agreed to the surgery and it went great, very little pain after.

We had our f/u appointment today... I had a lot of endosalpingiosis that he removed, which caused a lot of damage to my tubes... He said my uterus looked great.... That didnt make me feel any better :( He wants us to try on our own for a couple of months and then look at IVF. DH is going to have a SA next week. if the SA isnt great we are going to move fast on ivf. I asked him if dh SA was good would 20% chance of a bfp on our own would be realistic? He said that would be a very optimistic number. I left crying... I have no idea where we will get the money for ivf.. I asked what  our chances are with ivf he said 65 %.. My years of IF and pessimistic attitude thought wow that would be horrible to get a loan for all this money and it not work, to make that monthly pmt as a reminder that we still dont have a child would be heartbreaking.

How do people afford IVF?

Thats my story, almost 10 years of ttc has taken a toll on me today. I know we all have a cross to carry, Im just not sure how much longer I will be able to carry mine.....


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2006
In reply to: ab1979
Mon, 09-09-2013 - 10:40pm

I totally understand being unsure of IVF and the cost.

**child mentioned**

 My IVF baby turns ONE tomorrow and I am so glad that we decided to do IVF. I did 6 failed IUI's with one ectopic loss. I got pregnant on the first IVF (thank goodness) even after giving me lower odds than you got. It does work. We were lucky that my uncle paid for the IVF. If he didn't, I don't know what we would have done.

I hope things work out for you and don't give up hope. I am sorry this board isn't that active because when I went through IVF it was hopping.

Avatar for Cmmelissa
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-13-2008
In reply to: ab1979
Wed, 09-04-2013 - 5:12pm

Big (((HUGS)), that is so hard to not have any great options available to you.  Sure you have a better chance at IVF, but the risk is also great as well.  Do you have any shared risk programs in your area?  They can give a bit more security about trying IVF.  I hope that you don't have to go this route and that that it will happen after the LAP.