Waiting between cycles

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Waiting between cycles
42
Fri, 07-11-2003 - 7:01pm
I completed my first IVF cycle in early April, and it ended with negative results. I am now preparing to go for cycle 2. I decided to put a little time between tries to allow myself some emotional recovery time. Anybody else in a similar situation and interested in talking about it?

I find myself getting very anxious as the time gets closer. I am having a hard time waiting, but want to give myself another month of rest. The bad news was really overwhelming.

Shari

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2003
Sun, 07-13-2003 - 5:56pm
Hi Shari-

I just finished ICSI with IVF transfer. It was our first attempt, and we found out on 7/9 that the results were negative. We were devastated. I'm still very emotional about it - up and down throughout the day. Part of me was eager to jump right in and try again...the other part needs a little time. We decided to just move forward and have a new target date of 9/26. I'll have at least a month with no drugs. I've decided to focus on me - eat healthy, exercise, yoga, etc. Hopefully, this will put me in a better frame of mind for the next go-around.

Do you have a new target or are you just waiting to see how you feel? I'm anxious to see how things go for you this time. I've heard it can be easier since you'll know what to expect with the meds, ultrasounds, etc.

Good luck and let us know what you decide to do!

Michelle

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Sun, 07-13-2003 - 10:11pm
Michelle,

Thank you for your response. I am so sorry to hear about your negative results.

Our IVF attempt in April was also our first, and we did IVF with ICSI as well. Everything went well throughout the process, only the embryos didn't take.

I am planning to start all over again next month. That was when I was able to get some time off work. If I had it totally my way, I would have started this month. The wait has been good, giving me time to exercise and eat right and gather myself, but I am getting anxious now.

You're right about things being different this time. I'll know better what to expect with the shots and the retrieval and all. I only hope the end result will be different next time.

I will include you in my prayers. Maybe this next time will be successful for both of us. I know how you feel right now. Please know that you have the sympathy and support of a stranger who has been through the same thing.

Shari

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 9:53am
Hi Shari

I'm going through the same thing now. I had a failed IVF#1 in May and we decided to try again right away even though I was devastated. Of course, I'm still waiting for my period which is now 3 weeks late. I'm now spotting a little but that's it and it is driving me crazy, not the spotting-the waiting! I'm an emotional wreck. I think I'll feel better once the actual cycle starts.

Sue

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 11:22am
Sue,

I'm sorry to hear about your failed cycle in May. I do know what you're going through, and what it feels like to be an emotional wreck.

You are very brave for jumping into it right away. I felt as though I needed some time. Although I understand your frustration with your period. Ever since my IVF failed, all of my cycles have been late. I go from wishing my period would never come (while trying to get pregnant), to now wishing it would only show up on time so that I can start IVF again.

Best wishes for your next cycle. Please keep in touch and let me know how things are going. I will be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.

Shari

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2003
Mon, 07-14-2003 - 10:49pm
Shari-

Thanks for your kind words. There is definitely some comfort in knowing there are others out there going through the same thing. It is just so hard to describe to friends who have never had a fertility issue. I just know that both of us will be happy with the results the next go-around.

I responded just OK the first time, so they are going to increase my dosage of Pergonal next time. We ended up with 11 eggs and 3 embryos (1 "very good" and 2 "just OK"). On the plus side, my younger sister went through the same thing with the same doctor (and the same week!). She had positive results. She is eagerly awaiting her first ultrasound next week to see the baby (or babies). She also had 3 embryos, but her's were much better quality.

So, keep the faith...it will work for both of us! I, too, will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

Michelle

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-23-2003
Tue, 07-15-2003 - 9:33am
Thanks Shari,

The emotional support on this board has been fantastic as has my husband's support. Plus, I just found out this morning that my good friend/co-worker is pregnant. She told her husband first, then her sister and now me. I sorta guessed anyway. I'm happy for her but raw inside, if you know what I mean. She's 39 and her husband is 50 and her only other child is 17. She only has been off the pill for 2 months so happened quickly.

I've been spotting since last Thursday and have been eating tofu everyday and exercising to encourage my period but nothing yet. I even got a massage on Friday to relax.

I do understand you're need to wait, my husband's first reaction was that we should wait but I was worried that if I did, I would get too depressed. No one can understand the emotional impact of a failed IVF except for people who experienced it first-hand. It's the combination of the hormones that have been pumped into you along with the devastating impact of the failed pregnancy.

Good luck

Sue

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-07-2003
Tue, 07-15-2003 - 11:42am
Shari, Sue & Michelle -

I'm so sorry to hear about your failed cycles.

I received my negative result on Saturday, it was our first IVF/ICSI attempt. We were able to freeze one remaining embryo and plan to transfer my next cycle, which should begin mid-August.

I hope all of our outcomes are postive next time!

Sara

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2003
Tue, 07-15-2003 - 9:16pm
Sara, Sue, and Michelle,

Here's to success with our next attempts!

It seems as though we all have somewhat similar pictures. This was out first IVF attempt, and we did ICSI as well. I responded well to the meds, and they retrieved 13 eggs. 10 fertilized, but only 3 looked good at transfer. We transfered 2, and had one frozen.

We do still have one frozen, but my clinic doesn't like to thaw just one. So we are gonna go through the entire process yet again. Who knows, maybe we'll get more to freeze for potential future attempts.

The hardest part for me is that the majority of the people around me are getting pregnant. Plus, I work with babies. Michelle, that's wonderful about your sister! My sister has been through this process a few times, too, only hers have been successful. I am very grateful that she had success, but it makes it that much harder for her to understand me. And she was the one person, aside from my husband, who I turned to for support.

I will inclde you all in my prayers. When do you guys think you'll try again?

Shari

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-13-2003
Tue, 07-15-2003 - 10:32pm
Hi Girls-

What a coincidence that we all have similar stories. It will have a happy outcome for all of us! I have a new "target date" of Sept. 26, so will be starting meds in another month. I think it's a good time - not too far away, but far enough to allow for some emotional recovery.

During our first ICSI/IVF attempt, I had 11 eggs retrieved. Not sure how many fertilized (Dr. Silber doesn't give that info). We ended up with 3 embryos transferred and none frozen. As a comparison, my sister had 18 eggs, 3 embryos transferred and 3 frozen - a much better selection than me. But, live and learn....they now know to up the dosage of medication from the get-go. Hopefully, the results will be much better.

I, too, am surrounded by pregnant people. Most of my friends are on their second babies by now. We live in a neighborhood with kids everywhere - people are starting to think we don't like kids since we don't have any. Aagghh...the pressure!

I do feel comfort knowing that I have new friends out there going through the same thing, with the same whirlwind of emotions. Makes me feel like I'm not all alone! Hang in there everyone and keep the faith!

Michelle

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-31-2003
Tue, 07-15-2003 - 10:37pm
I took 2 months off between cycles...but it was mandated by my doctor (first month with no medications, 2nd month on birth control pills - actually a little over a month) and am starting another IVF cycle this week (waiting on AF now).

Hopefully I'll have a successful 2nd trip - and I hope that you do great too!!! Being unsuccessful is very hard....I know. Good luck...and if you'd like to talk about it feel free to email me (vdempsey@netdot.com).

Ginny

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