Wondering what is WRONG!!! (whiny)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Wondering what is WRONG!!! (whiny)
3
Sun, 03-30-2003 - 12:44pm
UGH!!!! Well, I guess after 2 months of using the prog. after O that I can safely say that low post-O progesterone isn't the source of my problem. The low prog. is more likely a result of whatever IS wrong with me and whatever it is that is causing my short LP. According to my fertility monitor I am supposedly ovulating each month. I typically don't have great CM, and when I do it only lasts about 1 minute (only noted during 1 trip to bathroom each month if at all). And, it typically does not coincide with the monitor.

We've tried all sorts of patterns for Bding. Every day, every other day, only at ovulation, 3 days before O, 3 days after O, and every other combination you could imagine.

Today is cd 28, 11 dpo & even using my progesterone, I've started spotting and I'm feeling very crampy. I remember when PG with DS I was initially very crampy when AF was due, but never in any pregnancy (2 misc & DS) have I had implantation bleeding. So, realistically I know AF is knocking on the door.

Cry, Cry, Sob, Sob.... feeling very sorry for myself today. Trying, as I do each month, to pick myself up from the gutter of utter despair. I know all of you know exactly how I feel. Well, I know my Dr appt is in 2 weeks, but somehow it is not any consolation to me today. Even if he will prescribe Clomid, I will have to wait until next month because in 2 weeks I will already be in the middle of another cycle.

Part of me wants to throw my fertility monitor out the window or drown it in the swimming pool. The other part of me wants to start temping again and see if I can compare both methods to see if they agree.

Well, I'll probably end up trying to temp again. For as much as I'd like to strangle the maker of that fertility monitor, it was an awfully expensive investment so I should probably not give up on it yet.

Thanks for listening again to my blabbering. Sorry it got so long.

Terra



iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Sun, 03-30-2003 - 1:09pm
(((HUG))) Terra - I'm so sorry you think AF is on the way. I truly had hoped you would have had success. I wish I had something perfect to say - but I can say I'm sending lots of hugs your way!

I use the fertility monitor too - and I'm not sure sure it is perfectly accurate. I've never done temp, so I don't know. Might be worth mapping both - since like you said the devise is so darn expensive!

There is some grand plan out there - I wish we had a looking glass to see what it is ahead of time to avoid hurt and frustration. My heart is with you and keep your chin up. You had success at least once, chances are you will again.

Thoughts and prayers are with you - and putting a hex on your AF for you! ;-)

Camay

Avatar for wi_valentine
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-31-2003 - 10:54am
Terra,

If only we lived close to one another, I'd invite you over for a tall, stiff drink! Sounds like we both need it. I am so sorry that you are starting to see signs of AF. It's so disappointing to think that a month where everything seemed perfect still did not bring that much-desired pg. The only words of comfort I can find for you are to encourage you to focus on that upcoming appointment that you've waited so long for. You were right to try the prog. supplements the past two months, because now you can go to that appointment knowing what doesn't work...that should count for something. Any kind of progress you can make to determine the root of your problem is good, it's a step forward toward that ultimate goal!

Yet I know before you can look ahead, you need to mourn the passing of the month. So take a day to indulge in yourself and smooch your DS, and then get your chin up and look ahead to the promise of the next month.

Hugs,

Sara

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Mon, 03-31-2003 - 1:37pm
Terra, I am so sorry that AF is a knocking at your door. Doesn't that Auntie know she is an uninvited guest?! So rude :) All kidding aside, I am sorry this month didn't work out for you. I am glad you are going to see dr in two weeks. I say keep track of temps as well as using the fertility monitor so you can make sure they coinside. Since the prog. isn't working, hopefully the dr will know what the next step is. the lack of CM might be an issue BUT in TCOYF it says that even if you can't see it on toilet paper it could still be there. They suggest checking your cervix position which I never did. WELL I am sending you big ole hugs right now. do something really special this month for yourself, like a massage, or manicure, or even just a starbucks coffee and read the paper alone for a few minutes....Of course you know my preference is wine and chocolates or a yummy slab of brie.....Big Cyber hugs being sent your way Julie