I *SHOULD* be excited

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-15-2009
I *SHOULD* be excited
Mon, 06-15-2009 - 8:13pm

I should be excited. I just found out Im pregnant after 2 years of TTC and one chemical pregnancy in 08. Instead I am deeply disturbed and upset. I am terrified that this pregnancy will be just like last time. I'll go to get a blood test to confirm it, then they will say that its negative and we'll be back at square one. I dont want to hurt Jeremy (dh) again. I fear he might just say to stop all together that Luna is our child and to leave it at that. Luna is my baby in many many ways but she's also my stepdaughter not my biological child. I love her to death she's everything I would want in a step-daughter but she's not MINE. I know how bad that sounds to some people but its the truth. What do I do if its the same problem all over again? Do I dare tell Jeremy and then have him want to stop TTC? This is ripping me apart.


iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Mon, 06-15-2009 - 9:20pm
I can understand the fear behind this, the idea that this one won't work like the other. I am on my 4th pg hoping on my 1st child. I think the important part is to b honest with your dh about how important this is to you. Unfortunately the pregnant after loss brain can be a terrible thing. I would first try and calm down some and then take this one step at a time. I would go get the b/w and see what it says. Also have you had any testing done on yourself to explain the difficulties you have been having ttc ? After 1 year ttc and 3 losses I have finally gotten some answers. I do hope this works out for you and I'm sending some sticky bean vibes !!!! please KUP

TTC with PCOS, MTHFR, APS (Hughes Syndrome) and a Mullerian Anomaly

 PCOS, Insulin Resistance, MTHFR, APS (Hughes Syndrome) and a Mullerian Anomaly  (bicornuate uteru

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-04-2004
Mon, 06-15-2009 - 9:47pm

I was scared of this same thing happening. I tested like a mad woman, just to see the line get darker. I had 4 beta blood tests and 3 ultrasounds

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-02-2009
Tue, 06-16-2009 - 8:26am

I understand where you are.