vent!!! need some encouragement

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-2003
vent!!! need some encouragement
2
Fri, 01-09-2009 - 10:23pm

Last night was the last night of me fertile window and my husband wanted a "rain check" on the BD. It's been a stressful week at work for both of us so we've only tried about half as many times this week as would be ideal. But seriously, when he said that I wanted to scream!!!! I'm thinking- um, yeah, doesn't quite work that way... I know it's only because he's clueless but he's asked not to know the details of why and CM and charting and all the rest of it, just the timing. He thinks we just go off BCP and it'll magically happen.

We're only ttc right now because he has been really pushing it (I wanted to wait six months because of uncertainty at work). I want this to be a super big deal to him like it is to me and it's just not. Am I wrong to be upset? How can I handle this without having an argument? I have just been avoiding him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2007
Sat, 01-10-2009 - 11:29am

I can completely relate. For me, it's like, I work so so hard to take my temp, check cm and cervix, eat right, take all my prenatals, quit coffee, do all my charting, etc etc, and it takes a lot of work... unfortunately I cannot do it alone. The ONLY thing they have to do is BD!! That's it! How simple is that???? And yet, if they aren't feeling like it, all that hard work and sacrifice we do will simply go out the window if they don't cooperate for that short time frame. It's extremely frustrating I have to say.

Now to answer your question, I guess how not to have an argument, just perhaps try not to stress over it. Are you charting? Do you know for sure that you ovulated? If not, then keep trying to BD. If yes, then when you get AF try and explain to him some of the details. Maybe since you have AF, he'll be more open to hearing about why it didn't work this month... that's just my guess, however my DH isn't at all interested in knowing the details either, so I can relate. It's frustrating because I want him to understand what's going on with my body like I do, but it just freaks him out.









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Lilypie Breastfeeding Ticker


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-04-2009
Sat, 01-10-2009 - 7:29pm

Oh my...yes I can totally relate. It is soooooo frustrating!!! In fact one of the night during this cycle when I thought it was a good time to BD, my DH went out with buddies to watch a game...I texted him to ask him to come home (he knew why) and