a diff. perspective on the new board..

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
a diff. perspective on the new board..
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 7:19am
good morning everyone! well! after not being here yesterday, what an interesting awakening to see the new board! i had seen an alert post on another board saying that the changes were coming and was wondering how it might impact our board here.

just a couple notes, if you dont mind me saying:

any kind of change is difficult for most people to adjust to. its in our nature. rememember the first time you came to a message board? you had to figure out how it worked. same thing here...it is taking us out of our comfort zone. and maybe that's not a "bad" thing. sometimes we need to have our worlds stirred up a little. let's give the board a chance...we may need to learn to think about it in different ways...we may need to figure out positives are going to come out of this change *how about the ability to email each other thru the board?* i think the friendships and connections we have made here are worth us stretching ourselves to figure out how to make the board work for us.

here's another way to think of it: change is something that we cannot escape. in fact, the rate of change of change is increasing ~exponentially~. if we cant adjust to a change in the structure _of_a_message_board_, how are we going to be able to teach the children we are so diligently trying to concieve, how to deal with the increased change they will experience in THEIR worlds?

one of the issues i was concerned about re the new board structure, is that our group relies so heavily on afnw groups that are constantly cycling. i'm wondering, if perhaps, instead of listing groups by AFNW dates, we consider listing groups by the ~~phases of the TTC cycle~~ . consider the following, or something similar?

Ladies in Waiting

Hosting AF

Waiting for O

BD Fest

2 Week Wait

1 Week Wait

AF Overdue

BFP announcements

Secret Garden


So, for example, those still in Tater Tots would probably be in the AF Overdue group. some of the TT's would have already moved onto the Hosting Group. this way, the groups can remain static; we would move through them as our cycle progresses, instead of being attached to a particular group. it would require us to be fluid...while the groups remain static. it would make it easier for gals to find the group they belong in. if we choose to use this concept, i think we will naturally move from one phase to another with a cluster of women, and the other nice part, for the Sisters of Irregularity, is that they will hopefully be able to choose where they are at in phase.

doing it this way would preclude the group names we have so much fun with and give us such a strong sense of identity with where we are in relation to our sisters on the board...BUT! using this new structure could help us get to know more women on the board better because our AFNW groups are really an artificial construct. think of it...how many times have you started off your cycle in one group but had an early or late O date that put your AFNW in another "group" anyhow? i know that it sure as heck frustrated me to be in a group, have a delayed O, and basically be the only one in a follicular phase, while everyone else was DPO. the purpose of the AFNW groups is to help us share the challenges and joys of each phase with other women who are in the same phase. i think that our AFNW groups perhaps put TOO much structure on something which is too dynamic and unpredictable. and i think that using phase groups instead of AFNW groups more clearly enables this intent.

so anyhow...fwiw...IMVHO...that's my thots on the matter...this doesnt have to be a bad thing. we can find good things in it, if we let ourselves. it is because we value the commnunity here so much that that the disruption is upsetting. and it is precisely that value of the community that should inspire us to adapt to the change and NOT LOSE that which we have all put so much heart and soul into creating.



Avatar for mom_to_audrey22201
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 7:22am
I LOVE you Sim...LOL Great idea on listing the groups!! I KNOW we can make this work for us!!!!

Kim :o)

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 7:31am
Well said Sim, I hope we can figure the board out, I am going to need this board more than ever next month when I come off hold!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 7:42am
I agree with your idea on the groups Sim...what a brain you have!

@ thumbs up on everything you said~(((HUGS))) Tara

Tara and my June bug!  ;o)

co-CL o

Avatar for decemberlove
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 7:48am

I think that is the best thing for this type of message board - it will just be so sad to see out cute little group names dissapear :( I've been lurking the past couple of months due to school and was just ready to re-introduce myself. I kept reading that theboards were going to change, however, I din't think it would be so drastic!! I'm willing to try and make this style board work - but what about naming the month or due dates?? I'd love if we could still hold onto *some* naming.

xoxoxox Stephanie

PS: I hope we don't lose to many girls this way - that would be sad.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 7:51am
Thanks Sim. I had a similar idea yesterday, but I think it got lost in the shuffle. There is a post under Board Business that our CL was asking for this type of feedback. You might want to put a not down there that tells here this stuff in case she misses this one. Have a great weekend!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 9:31am
I agree, I agree! Well spoken Sim. I always thought it was sad to have to make a new group every month - it just reminds you that you're still here. Re: the change, I agree wholeheartedly (sp?). Of course it's very difficult to adjust, but in the scheme of things it's not so bad. I remember hating this board the first few times I came on - not knowing where or how to post, what the abbreviations meant, etc. We'll learn. The only thing I really don't like is it does feel much slower. I've had a heck of a time navigating and posting because it takes so long.

Thanks for your wonderful post. I hope we adopt the new groups. It will also be better for someone like me who only posts here and there (for now). I won't feel like I'm letting my group down if I don't post every day because there will be so many others out there.


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 03-30-2003 - 7:06am
That is the BEST idea I have heard to date!!!!! I really really hope we can get the board setup the way you suggested! I was one of those women who O'ed late this cycle....

OMG I hope the other ladies agree also!!!


iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 03-30-2003 - 12:34pm
The sad thing about this is that it's been suggested several times already, but nobody can find the posts. They've been lost in the up and down popularity contest that determines the order of the posts. This post wasn't even done today, but it was first. I repeatedly put today only, but you know it gets tedious changing it. I do understand the new format and know how to use it. I just don't think it is user friendly. I still won't post as much but thanks for trying.