How do I do this?
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| Sat, 11-08-2008 - 3:31pm |
I am sitting here in tears right now, as I have been all day long. I got the news 5 days ago that DH has less than 1% normal sperm. I can't seem to come to terms with it. The worst part is that I am blaming DH. It feels like it's his fault that I can't have any more children.
It doesn't help at all that I am also dealing with this insanely long cycle. I feel like AF is coming, but she hasn't shown her face yet. I am so tired and so emotional. I know in my head that I shouldn't react the way that I have been, but I can't seem to fight it. All I know is that I have been told that we will most likely not be able to have kids and it's his fault.
I don't want to feel this way, but the thoughts just keep coming. Has anyone else has to battle with this? Please please please


(((((HUGS)))))
you can still get pregnant...it just may not be with the option you wanted...if DH is ok with it, and if the docs say sorry there is just no way to do this.....then you can go through a
(((HUGS)))
I am so sorry. But you CAN get pregnant -- it just takes 1 and it sounds like 1 of 100 are normal! How many come out at once, a million???
On a whim, I googled it... accupuncture was reccommended and I learned that it takes 100 days to make newmsperm, so for the next 100 days, you could
Stephanie I'm so sorry.
You didn't sound rude at all! Thanks so much for your insight.
Logically I know it's not impossible to get pg, but it does feel that way from time to time. IVF and other such means really aren't an option for us, at least not right now. We're slowly but surely plowing our way out of debt and building up a substantial savings account. DH made me promise that I wouldn't push for expensive means of
Steph,
I replied to your other post, but I really wanted to reiterate the option of an IUI. As long as you are okay (from a fertility perspective), you could do Clomid, with an IUI. Out of pocket, that is very cheap (maybe $1000 MAX). The Clomid is $9 at Walmart for people with no insurance. IUIs are a couple hundred bucks.
Also, if you do have insurance, look into coverage. I was pleasantly surprised to learn that all of my meds were covered, as were 8 IUIs and one IVF cycle.
In my opinion, a fetus is a fetus. It doesn't matter how it's created or how it gets there. I know you (or I to be frank!) never expected baby-making to turn into such a circus, but you will get used to the idea, if you choose to pursue this route.
GOOD LUCK! Hang in there,
Em
That's crushing news, I know. My DH got similar results and I went through the same blame game. I still am, even though I know it's completely irrational. It's completely normal and natural to have negative feelings toward DH, and the fact that you feel bad about it is a good sign (does that make sense?) He most likely feels terrible about it himself, but I'm sure he understands your anger and hurt. Talking about it to him, and venting to a trusted friend (or this board) who isn't going to go running back to him and will understand that you're just upset, rather than genuinely hateful, is great therapy!
I don't know how it will go for you, but for me the initial anger mostly faded (though it still comes back, especially in already high-stress times). But it hasn't gotten easier yet. I feel like I've been cheated out of something big, kwim? So you're not alone. And anytime you need to cry or get angry or whatever, this board is always here and we'll all support you thru this.
Best of luck to you!
Jackie: 25
DH Alex: 27
Married since: 10/29/2004
TTC since: 12/2005
Read my blog: losethatsmile.blogspot.com