How many days a cycle do you doubt be...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
How many days a cycle do you doubt be...
5
Sun, 08-10-2003 - 7:06pm

How many days a cycle do you doubt being ready for baby?



  • 0 -- Both DH/SO and I are completely ready
  • 1- 5 -- We're mostly sure, but there are days...
  • 6 - 10 -- between DH/SO and I, there are several doubts
  • 10+ -- On many days we doubt our efforts ttc
  • Other -- Please post


You will be able to change your vote.


Mary, Mama to Gavin, Derek, and Tyler
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 08-10-2003 - 7:38pm
Ok, it was me. I started this poll. I haven't voted yet, I'm not sure which category I'd choose...

Everyone here seems so sure. Am I the only one who has some doubts?

I'm 27, DH is 35. We got married in October, after nearly 10 years of dating and then living together. We m/c in fall 2000 at about 7 weeks. We both would have liked to have had that baby, we were trying and concieved on cycle 1.

Now, 3 years later, after buying a house and getting married, we're back to the subject of having kids. Yes, we want kids, but some days, I don't know, I just doubt if we're ready. Do we have enough $$? Do we have enough time? Will we be good parents? Can we find good daycare?

We started trying in June. We didn't BD even once near O in June or July (both for good reasons, although a totally seperate subject). Now that O is on her way, and BD is ziltch (well once, but Dh didn't finish...), I'm just wondering if maybe we shouldn't be looking to have kids now. I' don't know. There are some yard and house projects we could get done. Having baby would push them to the bottom of the list.

I have a dresser full of baby - 24months clothes, a highchair, a crib, and a boat-load of doubts.

Anyone else have doubts like this?

Am I the only one?

Mary, Mama to Gavin, Derek, and Tyler
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-24-2003
Sun, 08-10-2003 - 7:50pm
OK, I voted 1-5 days because, well, there ARE days when I wonder if we're REALLY ready or not. Especially days like yesterday...small vent coming. We went out to dinner with some people from our Sunday School class - we are the only ones who don't have kids yet. So, on the way home, two of the ladies with young kids were insisting that my DH and I need to remain "unburdened" for as long as possible. They kept saying if we ever wanted to do ANYTHING (travel, sleep, read, watch movies, have time to ourselves...the list goes on and on), we should not have kids for awhile.

Of course, they don't know we're TTC, so we just sat there and listened politely and acted sympathetic. I really think that they were just blowing off steam, but I have to say, it DID put some doubts in my mind. However, I think that once we have that beautiful baby to love and hold, any sacrifices will be worth it! So, regardless of the ever-so-helpful advice, we're going to keep on trying! :) Just wanted you to know you're not the only one! We might be the only two, but at least we're not alone! LOL! ;)

ADC ~ TTC #1, C4, CD30

http://circles2.fertilityfriend.com/home/adc1228

Abby's Signature

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-04-2003
Sun, 08-10-2003 - 8:27pm
I think we all have doubts from time to time (I haven't voted yet--I can't decide how many days yet), but trust me--once they are here you won't regret having them! We've got 2 little girls and yes, home improvements have slowed down, yes we have less money, yes we don't travel as much, but honestly we don't care! It took my husband a little while to get on board with having baby #3, but now that he is we can't wait to have another little one running around the house.
Avatar for soprano1965
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sun, 08-10-2003 - 9:25pm
there will always be house projects to do, there will always be some sort of excuse if you let there be-trust me nobody is ever truly "ready" for a baby, even if you think you are. but once they are born it is SO WONDERFUL! somehow the house projects and renovations don't seem so important anymore. oh and babies DO NOT COST THAT MUCH MONEY. breastfeed, cloth diaper, stay at home, etc etc, there is always a way. Babies do not need fancy gadgets, all they need is their mommy and daddy's arms.

Kim

TTC #2 and dont know if I'm "ready" LMAO

Just for this morning, I am going to smile when I see your face and laugh when I feel like crying.

Just for this morning, I will let you choose what you want to wear, and smile and say how perfect it is.

Just for this morning, I am going to step over the laundry, and pick you up and take you to the park to play.

Just for this morning, I will leave the dishes in the sink, and let you teach me how to put that puzzle of yours together.

Just for this afternoon, I will unplug the telephone and keep the computer off, and sit with you in the backyard and blow bubbles.

Just for this afternoon, I will not yell once, not even a tiny grumble when you scream and whine for the ice cream truck, and I will buy you one if he comes by.

Just for this afternoon, I won't worry about what you are going to be when you grow up, or second guess every decision I have made where you are concerned.

Just for this afternoon, I will let you help me bake cookies, and I won't stand over you trying to fix them.

Just for this afternoon, I will take us to McDonald's and buy us both a Happy Meal so you can have both toys.

Just for this evening, I will hold you in my arms and tell you a story about how you were born and how much I love you.

Just for this evening, I will let you splash in the tub and not get angry.

Just for this evening, I will let you stay up late while we sit on the porch and count all the stars.

Just for this evening, I will snuggle beside you for hours, and miss my favorite TV shows.

Just for this evening when I run my finger through your hair as you pray, I will simply be grateful that God has given me the greatest gift ever given.

I will think about the mothers and fathers who are searching for their missing children, the mothers and fathers who are visiting their children's graves instead of their bedrooms, and mothers and fathers who are in hospital rooms watching their children suffer senselessly, and screaming inside that they can't handle it anymore.

And when I kiss you good night I will hold you a little tighter, a little longer. It is then, that I will thank God for you, and ask him for nothing, except one more day.............

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-05-2003
Mon, 08-11-2003 - 3:43am


i voted other, i can't figure out why after almost a year of trying nothing has happened. we both know theres no perfect time for planning a baby, by then we'll have changed our minds, i've got my heart set on having a baby before i'm out of my 20's. its taken me a few weeks to convince my hubby he needs to be checked out to make sure its not me whose got the problem. we haven't set an appointment yet, we have to wait for him to get settled into his next command and his second job. even tho the last time i saw a doctor, that one tht told me if i wasn't pregnant in a year to come back and see him(i have an urge to slap that one) since we started trying in may of 2002 and a doc told me that in october of the same year. i've been discouraged and broken and wanted to give up but every time i see my niece i just can't i want her to have a little playmate since grandma is tricking her into guilt tripping me.

i've rambled enough and still trying to get over a bad week

lissa