i need to vent again
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i need to vent again
| Thu, 09-25-2003 - 6:43am |
i thought i'd be handling things ok, dh has his SA on monday so we're crossing our fingers that it'll have decent results. then i get an email from a freind i haven't seen or talked to lately, she just had another baby last week. n email telling me she was ever expecting just sends me the pictures. thanks for letting me vent i had to get that out.
lissa

About your friend, I"m sorry. Sometimes people can be so insensitive about things, and they don't realize that their greatest joys can bring heartache for others (like us who are trying soooo hard). Try to be happy for them and know that your time will come, all our times will come.
The day after I had a m/c a couple of years back my best friend called me to tell me she was PG. It was so hard and I thought she did it on purpose, to rub my nose in it. But she didn't. It's super hard looking in to her babies eyes knowing I should of had one a few months older. It's all a learning process I suppose. To top things off I've had to sit through 6 baby showers here at work over the past year, and each one I long for the shower to be mine.
Hang in there, and I understand your frustrations, we all do. Many hugs and *~*~*~*~*~*BFP*~*~*~*~*~*~* vibes to you.
HUGS - sunny :)
yea at least i'm gonna know where my dh is on monday. lol.
the friend who sent her babies pics to me i dunno if i ever told her i was ttc, i hadn't heard from her in so long except in junk emails. i'm kinda numb to all hte feeling i get seeing pg women and friends with their babies. dh is the one who almost broke my heart hte other night asking what would i want to do is his SA came back with bad results, i never wanted to think aobut htat so i never answered. i'm just afraid its not dh but stopping us from getting pg.
lissa
I'm sure your friend did not mean to be insensitive. Some people are vey naive and just don't have a clue!
I have to say I am very envious of your husband asking you what you'd want to do if his results were bad. I was in knots about having the SA done and could not even bring myself to ask DH what he would do if it came back bad. That was the worst part of having it done, not knowing what the heck we would do if it came back with a problem. The fact that he brought it up shopws he really cares :):)
Keep your chin up!!
Kath
i'm trying believe me i'm trying. as for what i'd do if dh comes back wiht bad results i dunno and i won't know yet, i'm just afraid that if hte results are bad that means i'll never have children of my own. he knows i want kids but we've never talked about what we'd do if we couldn't.
lissa
DH used to drill this into my head on a weekly basis and I really try to live by it these days. He used to tell me " Stop letting things in life you have no control over run your emotions, ever" I used to get infuriated with him for saying it but it makes a lot of sense nowadays.
I think about it every month when AF arrives! And when waiting for the SA results I would tell myself ALL THE TIME! I won't say I am sure your results would be fine because I have not a clue BUT the chances are they will be fine. And chances are that in the next 6 months you'll be on the grad board (hopefully so will I)!
Of course on 10/2 when AF arrives I'll probably drink myself into a stupper - but at least I can give you this advice now :):)
Kath
kath,
to know my dh did the same to me as your dh did to you is a suprise, when i met my dh i was very bitter very angry and very hungover and very close to suicidal and thought i had nothing left in my life. he kept telling me every day to get the hell over all of hte things done to me before we met and just enjoy things as they were. that was three years ago, i turned around from being so angry to so disapointed every time Af showed telling me i couldn't give my dh a baby. i even told him i don't want our children growing up the way we did, i wasn't sure if i was loved and he lost his father in his early teens. so we've both come a long way in our lives and we jst want to be able to give the love we have to a child of our own but i'm always gonna be afraid it won't happen.
dh has been so sweet to me recently and i dunno if its that AF came again or htat he realizes how much i've been hurting since he's been home every time i get that dreaded AF. today he wants to take me out for my birthday i made him promise me one thing tho, he's not allowed to put 23 candles on my cake or i'm gonna double the amount on his on sunday. hehe. i guess all my emotional pain has made him pay more attention to my needs and that he had to make a change, but i would just like a few days where he's not up my @$$.
lissa
That "get over it" line makes me insane !!!!!!!!!!!!!! :):)
OMG i HATE the get over it line, i thought my dh was telling it to me so he'd get some. hehe. he was right tho i had to get over it, and i did.