Leaving these boards w/ a comment...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Leaving these boards w/ a comment...
18
Thu, 03-27-2003 - 10:26pm
I can't stand this new board. I don't mind change, but ineptitude really bothers me. Did PP even try this format on a test group? I doubt it. My toddler could've designed a better program.

I wish all you ladies the best of luck in your endeavors! Everyone here deserves to have everything they desire. I just want to say something that's been bothering me since I've been on this board: I think it's very insensitive for ladies who have ALREADY conceived to continue to post regularly on a board designed for ladies who are TRYING to conceive. I mean, for God's sake -- if we have to place warnings in our post subject that we're about to mention pregnancy or children because we don't want to upset anyone who is so sensitive about not being pregnant that they can't stand to read about someone else's previous pregnancy or their existing child(ren), then doesn't it go without saying that having someone whine about her morning sickness is a slap in the face? It's just rude, intentional or otherwise. I can't believe that I'm the only person who feels this way.

Best of luck to y'all...

Lily

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 03-29-2003 - 8:44pm
Great post, Meghan! It's called personal accountability - good job!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Sat, 03-29-2003 - 11:07am
You know what?? This happens on every single board. Someone complains about PG women posting on a TTC board. Then when you graduate to an expecting board, it NEVER fails that someone will complain about someone posting that they had a miscarriage and it scared them.

The day I found parents place when I was pregnant, I didn't know what the heck I was doing...I signed up on the WRONG expecting board (don't know how THAT happened..LOL!) and I went to read birthstories, and ended up reading the stillborn stories. I didn't think, "why would someone talk about that??" like I've seen MANY women post and go complain about it. NO...I thought, "what an aweful thing to have happen to a family," and I prayed right then and there and thanked God for the blessing inside me and Prayed for mothers going though this. I should have prayed for myself (but I was afraid to..wondering if it was selfish) because I ended up miscarrying. Before I could even post on the correct expecting board, I told PP that I was no longer PG, and they referred me to the PG loss board. THEY ACTUALLY spent the time to write to me and tell me they were sorry for my loss and told me about the m/c board. I will ALWAYS be thankful to PP for giving me that outlet.

I've been the woman who couldn't stand to LOOK at a pregnant women...the NERVE of her showing herself in public. I was EMBARRASED by my thoughts and feelings at that time, shortly after my m/c. I would have NEVER gone up to her and vented my IRRATIONAL thoughts (not abnormal, and common after a loss...and suffering from depression...BTW), and I don't see why people think it's okay to do so while hiding under an anonymous screen-name on the board.

I don't think I ever posted my vents about these situations, but I am today.

I need to say that I'm thankful to women talking about their pregnancies; complications, discomforts, elation, and all. It get's me excited about TTC and also makes me aware of things to look for, things to think about, what to expect, what to worry about, what not to worry about. Why would ANYONE want to get pregnant and NOT know what's going on with their body or what's going to happen. How would you even KNOW that you DO want to get pregnant without having a pregnant woman stop by and tell you how WONDERFUL (even though uncomfortable at times) it is to have a LIFE GROWING INSIDE YOU!?!?!

I just wonder how stupid/humbled these people feel when they end up having a miscarriage themselves after attacking another women for expressing her grief over one.

THERE...I've said my two cents...or two dollars, maybe..LOL!

(((HUGS))), Meghan WtoTTC#2

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 9:25pm
Lily, I'm very sorry if any of my posts after my announcement hurt you or were insensitive in any way to anyone. I have tried to stay away and have posted as rarely as I could. I did not want a few people to feel like I had abandoned their friendship that I had developed over 7 months of being on the board; or that once I was pregnant, I didn't care about them anymore. Also, I just couldn't help myself by posting when I found out it was twins. And I got so much support from this board that I really needed regarding an issue of telling people/not telling people about the clomid. The friendships I made and the support I received on our ttc board is what made this pregnancy finally happen (in addition to God, of course). It is hard to just turn that off like a faucet once you conceive.

I agree about the new format. I despise it as well and wonder how in the world ParentsPlace or IVillage expects their site to survive once we all leave. I am sad, though, that you felt the need to lash out as you said farewell. Please accept my apologies as I never intended to hurt anyone - but only to offer my support as often as I could and occasionally share my own concerns. Good luck to you and I hope you see a BFP very soon.

Eone

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 6:57pm
As another pg lady that received her BFP this month, I am jumping in on this too. Like the Melissas', I was cautiously optimistic about my BFP's. That tends to happen when you have been TTC for a YEAR! I had many women thank me when I told them how long I had been trying. I for one always felt that the BFP's were encouragement and gave me hope.

I am now on the November EC board and I often see posts about m/c. This is frightening when you see 2 or 3 a day. But I respect other people's feelings and understand that they need my support and they need to communicate their feelings.

Lily, I wish you the best and hope that you don't have to wait for a year to get your BFP. And I hope that when you get it, you don't take an HPT every day b/c you are so scared the positive will go away.

Mandy, TTC#1 11 months, EDD 11/26

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 2:40pm
Lurker delurking

I have lurked here on and off enough to know that this board sees a post like this one oh, every few months. There's an uproar, people make attempts at making it more comfortable for everyone here, and it blows over. Don't leave over it. If you indicate in your header that there may be mention of pg/mc/children, etc...that's the person's opportunity to decide to read it or leave it. If they read it, they have no right to complain about what the post contains. You did your job.

-J

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 2:02pm
You know.. to be honest.. I don't really know. I know that Mitzi from PP answered this

question a couple of days ago on the welcome board.. but I honestly don't remember.

And.. No.. I wasn't able to do my job for about 5 weeks. I DID check in every chance I had.. but at the library here.. we're only allowed 30 minutes.. which is just barely enough time to read down the board.. (the old format, that is..)

BUT.. Before losing the phone (and the computer problems)... and after we got things worked out... I've been here just about every day. I may not post as much as some people want.. but I'm here. And I do post. (I've been a bit leery of posting to some people because of what happened after the m/c in September... on the board.)

I, personally, was not able to participate in the new CL board.. because it was done

while I had no phone and bad computer problems. HOWEVER.. there are several women who

post here regularly who ARE cl's on other boards.. We all see and read the posts on our

boards.. and responses for these new boards were given by the cl's as to what they

thought would be usable.. and not usable for their boards..,etc... And... remember.. this

info was collected over the last several years, not just recently.

Hope you can understand where I'm coming from.

Jen

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 1:25pm
Not to say that you are not real people. But what percentage do the cl 's make up of this board. I still say it was insenative for PP to poll/test/whatever on only the CL. NOt every cl does there job and some hardly show up(i am not meaning you by any means, i know what your situation is). They are taking suggestions from the few over the many.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 12:52pm
I for one feel very appreciative of those that are pg sticking around to offer their continuing support and advice. I don't want you all to leave. I find the support of someone that as you say has BTDT irreplacable.

(((HUGS))) And I hope you will not take one persons opinion as the opinion of all.

Tara

P.S. I hope when my BFP ((finally)) comes I will still be welcome here as well.

Tara and my June bug!  ;o)

co-CL o

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 12:42pm
That was perfect!!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 03-28-2003 - 12:35pm
Lily,

I just wanted to say one thing. Yes. The boards WERE tested on real people.. the CL's.

We had our CL boards (we need other CLs' support, too) changed some weeks back.. and

we were able to help PP find and fix glitches.. amongst other things. (helping to

improve certain features)

Good luck to you.. hope you get your BFP soon.

Jen

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