Spot back! AF on the way...I'm okay : )

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Registered: 05-09-2003
Spot back! AF on the way...I'm okay : )
3
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 11:20am
Spot has returned, along with AF cramps...so I expect the hag will arrive sometime later today... And my temps fell WAY down this morning... Thanks to everyone who supported me yesterday when Spot first arrived. I'm actually feeling okay today! :)

The good news is that the Clomid-enhanced PMS raging crazy hormonal moods and crying fits seem to have disappeared! Yay! I've NEVER been like I was this past week...hopefully next cycle will be better. My doc has doubled my Clomid dose for this cycle...so that is a little scary...I'm just going to have to contain it.

Had an interesting talk with DH. I asked him if he still loved me even though I've been so difficult to live with the last few days...He said of course he loved me, but he wondered how I was feeling about him. I've been really focused on MY disappointments at failing to get pregnant as quick as we had thought we would...and have been so moody from the hormones and feelings of "failure"... I did not really think about the fact that DH is feeling disappointment, too. He really does not show his feelings much...so I just figured he was fine. In truth, he has worried that he is falling short somehow...that if he were a better husband, maybe I would not have been so "down" this past week. I was floored! I assured him it had nothing to do with him. But it has really made me realize the importance of checking in with him and see what he is feeling more often. I hate that he was feeling that way.

We have decided we are probably going to TTC this month...and if it does not happen, we are going to take a little break from it for a few months. The hormones are really hard on me, and I need a break. We have a big move planned in January (from Texas to Seattle) which will be a lot of work. And I might work on losing another 15 to 20 pounds during the break. Then once we are settled in Seattle, will find a good doctor and start TTC again up there...So...HOPEFULLY...it will happen this month! But if not...I'm okay with that. I truly believe God will bless me with a child when the time is right. I just need to quit trying to control everything and worrying about things so much.

Good luck to everyone! I hope to see LOTS of BFPs soon! :)

Anne

http://circles2.fertilityfriend.com/home/AnneMD03


Edited 9/13/2003 4:14:19 PM ET by annemd03

Anne - Proud Mommy to Rachel Elizabeth!

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Registered: 07-31-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 11:29am
Hope this month belongs to you!!!
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Registered: 05-03-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 11:45am
Anne,

((((((((((Huge Mega Truckload of Hugs ))))))))))))) !!!! ( As Connie likes to say)

So sorry Spot has returned and that AF may very well be knocking on the door. I know how positive you were trying to be this cycle that this would be the one. I just hate to hear that for you. I know you and DH must be extremely disappointed. And yes, I know all too well what you're speaking of with the DH's not showing their emotions and us sometimes forgeting how their feeling in all of this TTC journey. I'm so glad you all were able to talk about that. I have found that since I've been sharing all the TTC stuff with my DH that he is so much more understanding, and knowledgable. I think he feels more a part of it, you know what I mean? I used to keep everything from him, wouldn't tell him anything, wouldn't tell him if I was going to test, nothing. I dealt with it myself. I think we both feel better and we talk about it more and know what the other is thinking/expecting etc. It's been really great.

I hate to see you take a break, but I totally understand. Maybe you won't have to. Maybe you'll get pg this next cycle. Maybe the new dose of Clomid will help. I'm like you though, I'm a little concerned about your mood swings with increasing the Clomid , especially with how the 50mg effected you. The Dr. should know what's he's doing though. I hope it works.

I feel a little guilty that I feel so much better today and you're feeling so bummed. FF gave me my coverline and "O" date today, but I'm concerned about my temps. I hope it goes up tomorrow or I'm afraid FF will take away my "O" date if it doesn't go up. Looks like BDing was timed perfectly, so I'm in the 2ww . I'm hoping to not obsess too much. Anyway, I've learned that all those little twitch and twinges, swollen and sore BB's, headaches, backaches, and tiredness, etc. are all very normal for me every month. I don't even know if I will "know" if I get pg. But, I'm gonna stay hopeful.

Take care girl and if you need me, email me. We'll be home this weekend as far as I know.

~Lisa O~ C5 CD16 3DPO

http://circles2.fertilityfriend.com/home/24884


Avatar for annemd03
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Registered: 05-09-2003
Sat, 09-13-2003 - 11:54am
Lisa,

DON'T feel bad about feeling happy about your O!!! I promise...I'm really NOT feeling bummed today. Yes...I would rather AF not come visit, but I'm truly feeling quite good today! :) I have this feeling of peace that things will work out for me okay...if not this month, then sometime soon. And as my DH told me...we are going to have a wonderful life together no matter what happens...and I believe that.

So you enjoy the great feeling about getting your O! I'll hopefully be getting my O in the next few weeks, too! :) I'm wondering if the higher dose of Clomid might make me O a little sooner...I would LOVE that! I hate my LONG cycles!

Well...I gotta get back to work!

Take care,

Anne

Anne - Proud Mommy to Rachel Elizabeth!