No longer TTC :(

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2008
No longer TTC :(
16
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 6:17am

DH found out today that his work contract will not be renewed for next year.

This means that he is now looking for work. He has been with his current employer since we graduated college so this is a big shock and disappointment to us.

I will have to try and get work now, too, which means no baby for us anytime soon. I will have to put DS into full time daycare, which I did not want to do... but no other choice now and I'm just praying I can get a contract.

I am cancelling my appointment at the RE, as for one, we cannot afford to pay for the appointment with all the uncertainty ahead, and for two... we can't really TTC when things are so uncertain for us.

I'm super upset because we are both post-grad educated professionals, but our area of work is so unstable that there is no firm future for us. We are both considering a career change, even though we both love what we do.

To top it off, we have started discussing selling our house and renting until we are both back working (after we're done having kids). This breaks my heart almost as much as having to delay my baby dreams . It took us a lot of hard work to save our downpayment, and even with our careful savings it took an inheritance from a loved family members' passing to help make up our deposit. I have been so proud of us for buying a home in our 20s and renovating it.... housing where we live is incredibly expensive and many young people (our friends) who are double-income-no-kids still can't afford to buy a home into their thirties. I'm terrified we will never get back into the market if we lose our asset now.

Poo-poo. I'm having my own pity party over here. It stinks. I'll still be around reading your posts and awaiting your BFPs with you, but it will be a while before I'm back on the TTC train. :(

B

B, loving wife to L. Proud Mum to William Luke (22 months) and expecting Samuel James in November. >

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-30-2006
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 6:45am

Oh, B, I'm so sorry :smileysad:.

--Wendy
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2007
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 6:48am

Wow, what a huge blow. Im so sorry! That's awful. But maybe a career change would be good for you and/or your DH. Even though you both love what you are doing now, there might be a better opportunity for you in a slightly different field. I just hope that he (and you!) can find new work quickly. I know it is tough times out there right now.

I would reconsider about selling your home. I would not go that far! Youre right that it would take a lot of time, money and hard work to get back to where you are now. Owning your own home IS a huge accomplishment, and every time you make a payment, you are putting more equity into your home. It just doesnt financially make sense to give that up and go rent... even though in the short-term it might be cheaper than a mortgage, it will still end up putting you further into debt and uncertainty.

As for not TTC right now, I am infinitely sorry about that. Youre right that it might not be wise to get pregnant right now... but I know it kills you inside to have to shelf your dreams for a new baby. That's so, so hard! Is there a way that you could go to the RE appt anyway, just to see what they say?

CHILDREN MENTIONED: Putting your DS into FT daycare must be difficult for you to consider.... I know it would be really difficult for me to be away from my kids all day long, over 40 hrs/wk. But as moms, we sacrifice and do what we have to do, to keep our family together.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2007
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 7:09am

Oh no! That's awful news. You definitely deserve that pity party.

I'm not sure what you two do, but when I finished grad school it was just in time for the economy to tank. All the funding for public health grinded to a halt and I couldn't find work in my state. I ended up having to become a

Chouli, 34; DH 45 Lilypie Pregnancy tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-06-2010
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 9:09am
Oh hun I am so so sorry. That is just not fair! I will be praying for you and DH to find work soon. I can't imagine what you're going through. We are all here for you and hope to see you back ttc again soon!

Katie, DH, DD- Emma (11/27/11), #2 due 10/4/13 : )

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-02-2007
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 10:07am

B - I am so sorry to hear about your DH's job, that is awful and you guys must be so upset.

Kelly, mom to 4 year old Lexi, wife to Rob TTC Number 2 since April 2010, with a loss in June 2010 at 4.5 weeks, and a loss in April 2011 at 8 weeks (possibly ectopic). Saw the RE in May 2011, we were moving forward with testing and an IUI when we
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2004
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 10:17am

Oh no, I'm so sorry.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2009
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 2:12pm

Oh, honey :( I know this is lame but I am so sorry...I lack anything super helpful or intelligent to say that will make you feel better about this. ((hugs))

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-1998
Fri, 11-19-2010 - 2:37pm

Oh my gosh....I'm so sorry about your husband's unemployment and your having to look for a job yourself. Putting off TTC must be a

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2008
Sat, 11-20-2010 - 4:52am
Hey Wendy,

Thank you, we'll get through it, DH is also able to work in another field so we're looking into that as an option.

Hope to be back again soon!

B
B, loving wife to L. Proud Mum to William Luke (22 months) and expecting Samuel James in November. >

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-17-2008
Sat, 11-20-2010 - 4:55am
Hi Nicole,

I'm also hoping this is a window of opportunity and a message for us to see what else is about for us. The only reasons we would sell the house is if neither of us get work and we run out of savings. We could at least pay out our car, and then save whatever we make to reinvest in a home as soon as we're on our feet.

I know what you mean, it's not ideal for DS to go full time, but it's less ideal for him to not have a roof over his head. :)

B
B, loving wife to L. Proud Mum to William Luke (22 months) and expecting Samuel James in November. >

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