Question for moms/aunts about clothing size

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Registered: 05-11-2010
Question for moms/aunts about clothing size
6
Thu, 07-07-2011 - 10:52am

Really, a question for moms or aunts or any of you who have an idea here . . . .

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Registered: 07-28-2009
Thu, 07-07-2011 - 12:43pm
omg I read this and all I could think of is my DD. She was and still is, just like that. When she was born she was nearly 8 lbs and then she just stopped gaining weight (at least not much) The ped. was freaked out and ran her through a giant battery of tests that shows she is perfectly healthy. She is just tiny :) She is 7 yrs old and could STILL wear 2T pants if they weren’t too short. They’d fit her in the waist easily. To hold him back in school because of his size is ludacris. What about huge kids? Should they move up because they’re so big? The pressure to conform and “blend in” really works my nerves.
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Registered: 11-13-2008
Thu, 07-07-2011 - 2:39pm
Do you happen to know what his percentile was for his height? Some kids are just naturally small, but most 5 yos are wearing larger than a 2T at that age. I would probably be worried also, would they listen to your mom at all about her concerns? If he does start kindy this year, he would have to go in for a checkup beforehand so maybe the doctor will be more proactive about his weight.

There are some kids that are smaller than their peers at school, and they don't seem to be picked on at all. Actually, from what I can see they are all very popular and have lots of friends.

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Registered: 06-27-2006
Thu, 07-07-2011 - 2:41pm
A child's size shouldn't matter about starting school. It should be based on whether he's READY to go to school, emotionally, socially, and educationally (whether he's mature enough to sit through classroom time and focus on what a teacher is teaching). If he's this small this year, I'm going to take a wild stab in the dark and say that he's not all of a sudden going to gain a ton of weight and grow half a foot in height by this time next year. If he's ready to go to school, they should send him. If he's not, then I believe that with a November birthday, he should be allowed to be held another year, if he's not academically ready to start school. But, again, it should have nothing to do with his size.

BUT, something else that MIGHT help is that he could start eating school lunches and perhaps that will help him with his weight gaining? When he DOES visit you, try to get him to eat more varieties of things. I also know that a friend of mine just had her son evaluated by an Occupational Therapist for sensory issues regarding eating (textures of foods have kept her son from eating healthy foods and his weight and size have suffered, too).

In any event, if the school issue is simply fear that she will be scrutinized, holding him back a year won't rectify things - it'll only delay things by a year. Once he's a certain age, it will be mandatory that he attend school. Plus, if she's concerned about being scrutinized, she should also be worried about a doctor's office scrutinizing things. They are required to report any sort of abuse or neglect, too. So, if she's taking her child to the doctor, I imagine that the fear of scrutiny isn't necessarily the issue.

Just my thoughts on things. As for my DD, she was tiny when she was younger (yes, she had a pair of shorts that were size 12 months that she wore up until she was about 3 years old. I couldn't turn her carseat around to forward facing until she was 15 months old because it took her that long to reach 20#'s. When she was 4 and I should have been able to put her into a booster, based on age, I had to wait until she was 4.5 years old because kids have to be 4 AND 40#'s to go into a booster. She didn't reach 40 pounds until 4.5 years old. Then, she started on a huge growth spurt and she is a pretty thick kid now. The doctor is now worried about her gaining TOO much weight. BUT, then again, it was around the time that we put her on a gluten free diet (right around 4 years and 9 months old), she started actually GAINING weight. She has digestive issues that haven't been confirmed by medical testing, but more just by trial and error testing. So, my guess is that she was not getting the nutrients she needed and therefore was not gaining the weight she should have, until we put her on the gluten-free diet. Now she's getting ALL the nutrients she needs, but the doctor's is concerned. I think I'll take the proper nutrition and tweaking meal portions and such over poor nutrition and sluggish weight gain.

Sorry I went off on a tangent about nutrition and how my DD is affected, but I just wanted to share that aspect, too.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2010
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 10:01am

He is in the 3rd percentile for height, too, or at least he was the last time he was seen by his doctor.

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Registered: 05-11-2010
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 10:23am

I think he's definitely ready educationally, but socially and emotionally may be a little stretch.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2006
Sat, 07-09-2011 - 11:03am
To be honest, I know many families where one child is big and the other is rail-thin. They are offered the same foods to eat. Sometimes it has to do with textures of foods that one child doesn't have a problem with and another child does. If that child was eating fast food all the time, you'd expect him to be pretty big. So, I wonder if there's more going on than that? I know it's not your place to say anything and you aren't the one taking the child to the doctor's, but maybe the doctor will notice that the brother has a healthy height and weight and this child is much thinner. You can only hope that they will try to figure things out via blood tests (thyroid, absorption issues, etc). But, if the child is in the 3rd percentile for both height and weight, they might not say anything because the height and weight ratio are the same. Now, if he falls completely off the grid with either of those, they might start to question why he's losing height and weight percentages. But, I think they also recognize that there are those children who do fall on those outer parts of that pretty bell curve. Otherwise they wouldn't have that "bell curve" structure. They would have kids all growing at the same rate for their ages. It would certainly make clothes shopping a whole lot easier. But, alas, that's not how it works. LOL!

I do understand your concern, but at this point, you just have to do what you can to offer healthy food options at your house and then know that you've done what you legally can do. It's sad that your sister is telling her older son to just work off the food he eats, but you also don't want to speak up and contradict her and potentially create a rift where you won't get to see those kids at all because your sister feels like you are trying to parent for her. Just use positive language around the kids and try to avoid conversations that might focus on food, fat, and weight. If one of the kids says something about their weight, you can simply give him a hug and say, "I love you just the way you are!" and then just leave it at that. My DD is sensitive to her weight, but not as much as she might be if she were in public school surrounded by kids who are focused on that (she was worried about things back in Kindergarten when she was in public school). Not to say that public schools are all bad - I just saw things going down a bad road even back then in our school district. And then again, she's also a super-duper sensitive kid. So, we do positive reinforcement of healthy food choices when we DO talk about food and constantly reassure her that we love her always, no matter what (no matter what she says, does, looks like, acts like, etc). I would just reassure your nephews that you love them both no matter what. :)
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