Another tough weekend

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2011
Another tough weekend
4
Mon, 06-13-2011 - 9:27am

Whenever I get my period, it's always a tough few days for me. I always get so down knowing another month has gone by where I wasn't able to get pregnant. I often feel like such a failure and like I am letting my husband down. I know how badly he wants children, and I just wish I could give this gift to him. Sometimes I wonder how long we should try before giving up. I know I haven't been trying nearly as long as some people on this board, but at times it is so emotionally draining. And it only makes matters worse seeing all my friends and family who are pregnant or who just had babies. I hope one day our prayers will be answered, and if they aren't, I hope we can still be happy.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-22-2011
Thu, 06-23-2011 - 12:15am
Hey I feel ya,
I remarried a wonderful man this past April. Already, I had 3 daughters from a past marriage; he had 2 daughters and 1 son from previous relationships. We did not try to conceive but did conceive. However, we lost a baby via natural miscarriage...2 weeks before our wedding. I took bc pills for a month and then no contracepts.I already had a normal AF May 29th. So expected another 29th this months. Hopefully, it won't come because we are ttc.
I am growing verrrryyy impatient and anxious because I want to go on a diet because of all the weight I had gained with the pregnancy. But, Im afraid to to take any pills bc may hurt my chances for ttc. Don't know what to do?

Baby dust to you :)

~Johnetta
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2010
Mon, 06-13-2011 - 11:08am

Sorry that you're having a hard time.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2011
Mon, 06-13-2011 - 10:36am

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2006
Mon, 06-13-2011 - 9:52am
I can relate to the questions of how long do you keep trying before you give up. It IS emotionally draining, but when you have a dream, it's very hard to give up that dream, even if getting to that dream is not easy. How long have you been TTC? Have you gone for any infertility testing? If you haven't been TTC for at least a year and have not gone for any testing, then I would say that it is nowhere near time to be giving up. Keep trying, get in to your doctor (once you get to a year of TTC - or if you are over about 30-35, see if they will take you after 6 months of TTC), see what they can do for you initially through testing. Often that involves bloodwork, perhaps a follicle study via ultrasound, perhaps some testing on DH (semen analysis), they might do an HSG (where they check for any structural abnormalities in your uterus and ovaries). After that, they may try you on some fertility meds (most doctors start out with Clomid or Femara). See if they will also check your progesterone levels. If they are low, then they may put you on progesterone supplements, too.

I wouldn't give up until you've exhausted all possibilities that you can afford or that insurance will cover.

If you're not up for going through that to have your own biological child, there are also the adoption options. But, I'm guessing that's not on your radar yet. After nearly 3.5 years of TTC, my DH and I have very briefly discussed adoption and/or foster care. We're definitely not there yet in being totally accepting of that. We would REALLY like to have another biological child. But, we're also coming to the realization that that might not happen for us. So, we are really starting to talk and struggle through and anguish over what is going to be the right choice for us. (((HUGS))) TTC is not easy for many of us!
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