I am new...but need you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2011
I am new...but need you!
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 10:04am

Hello...my sister recommended all of you for me. I have really needed some people who can REALLY relate to my situation and sadness. I have had two miscarriages since July 2010 and 1 chemical pregnancy (no living children). My husband and I long for a baby and are really struggling with these losses and just feel hopeless. We are continuing to try and have an appointment with a new doctor next month. I am hoping she will run tests and be sensitive to our situation unlike my previous doc who seems to think 2 m/c are no big deal and will not do testing until it happens 3 times! :( I don't want to go through it again. Anyway...I look forward to hearing from all of you and learning from you.


iVillage Member
Registered: 01-13-2004
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 11:20am
Hi Andrea
Welcome to the board. This is a wonderful place for support. I have found much support here. Hope your stay will be short with us and that the appointment with the new doctor goes well.


iVillage Member
Registered: 10-14-2008
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 12:12pm

you are definately in the right spot! the women on this board are so wonderful...sharing experience,strength and hope ...and offering loving comfort when needed!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2008
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 4:02pm

Welcome to the board, Andrea.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2006
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 4:06pm
I'm glad you found us, but I'm so very sorry for your losses. :(

Now, I do have a question for you - does your doctor seem to not think of your chemical pg as a miscarriage? If that's the case, I would talk with that new doctor about your THREE losses. A chemical pg is still a pg. Something had to implant and create HCG, so it is technically a loss. Which means that you have had your 3 losses and they should be testing you. It might have been super early, but it was still a loss, nonetheless.

When the new doc asks you how many pregnancies you have had, you can confidently say 3 and when they ask how many living children you have, you can say 0. And then sit down with the doctor and discuss what to do and where to go from there.

Good luck with your appointment next month. Definitely keep us posted on how things go! Jump in where you want to, and we look forward to learning from you, just as much as you learn from us! :) We're all in this boat together!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2010
Mon, 03-21-2011 - 7:30pm

Hi, welcome to our little corner. I'm so sorry for your losses. You've found a wonderful group of very supportive women who will definitely be able to relate to your experiences because we've been through it as well. I can totally feel you on the longing and frustration, my husband and I have been trying since our first loss in 1999. 11.5 years later and 4 angel's and we remain childless. It's an extremely frustrating situation. I can tell you that seeing and/or hearing about pregnancies makes me so very jealous. I will turn around in the aisle at the grocery store to avoid the pregnant women, who always seem to be magneted to me.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2011
Tue, 03-22-2011 - 7:57am

Thank you ladies so much. It is just such a blessing to be able to share my experience with people who have been/are in my shoes! Thank you for taking to time to welcome me.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2010
Tue, 03-22-2011 - 8:57am
Hi and welcome. I'm so sorry for your losses. My doc didn't wanna test after two either but I probably annoyed the heck outta him till he finally did. Maybe a new doc will help you. HUGS
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2011
Tue, 03-22-2011 - 3:10pm
Like Torie said, you are paying them! Tell them what you want. My OB didn't want to count chemical pregnancies as "real" since I tested "too early". But, I just kept asking her questions and asked her what the next step was. I basically let her know that I wasn't going to take "lets see what happens next time" as an answer.

I am so sorry for your losses. (((hugs))) I hope you get some answers soon.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-03-1998
Wed, 03-23-2011 - 1:17pm
{{{{{HUGS}}}}} to you. I'm so sorry for your losses. I've had 3 losses myself in the past 14 months.

I'm glad you are going to a new doctor for testing.

You've definitely come to the right place here....I love these ladies!
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-09-2008
Thu, 03-24-2011 - 6:56pm

Welcome to the board from one new member to another. I recently joined after a miscarriage 2 weeks ago, and although it's been a struggle, the support of family and friends and the comfort and understanding that I get from this board has really helped me tremendously. I completely understand your misgivings about having to wait for a 3rd potential miscarriage before beginning tests to figure out what's wrong, and I would also probably at least seek a second opinion. Doctors are so different, so I'm sure there's someone out there whose more sympathetic and understanding of your needs. I wish you a short and healthy TTC journey.