New Here with m/c question

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2007
New Here with m/c question
10
Sat, 03-12-2011 - 11:44pm

Hello ladies,

Well, here I am.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2006
Sun, 03-13-2011 - 7:25am
Dana, I'm very sorry for your loss. I understand your frustration of trying for a sibling for your child. I've been there with having trouble TTC your first. And I definitely know the frustration of having the "ideal spacing" of your children thrown out the window. We're now sitting here with one child and even if we were pg today (which isn't the case), our DD and a sibling would be nearly 9 years apart. We were hoping for more like 5-6 years apart. And we've finally stopped trying, even though we're not preventing (which is why I'm still posting here - I don't feel like I can leave this great group of ladies when I'm not entirely out of the game, even though I'm sorta warming the bench).

As for your other question - your body went through a semi-trauma. It's still somewhat healing. So, for you to feel strange cramps in your pelvic area, that could be normal. I don't know whether your body is cycling yet. It's entirely possible as well. There are some ladies who get pregnant without ever having their first AF after miscarriage. Some women go on to carry those pregnancies to term with a health baby. Others miscarry again. I can't tell you what's right for you and what your body will do. I think that you were early enough that your body should be healthy enough to conceive and potentially carry to term if you were to get pregnant before your first AF. But, as for the strange cramps, I'm just thinking that it could simply be that you had trauma to that area with a miscarriage and that your body is still healing. As long as you aren't bleeding still from your m/c, you should be ok. I'm just guessing it's sensitive "down there". If the cramping continues, though, I would give your doctor a call. And if you start to bleed heavily after intercourse, then I would definitely call the doctor.

I think the general idea of waiting until your first AF to TTC is so that your body has a chance to heal, your body can show you that it's back to "working order" and that if you do get pg again, it's somewhat easier for a doctor to pinpoint how far along you are.

Good luck and I hope your stay here is short!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2009
Sun, 03-13-2011 - 8:45am
Hi there Dana. I can def understand how you feel and would have sad a lot of the things T just said. Although we didn't have ANY trouble conceiving our first, our second is just not happening for us. 5 years, thousands upon thousands of dollars in fertility treatment and two m/c later, we are also kind of warming the bench but they throw me in for a couple plays now and again :) I am going to stop treatment after this next cycle and although we will still be trying, we would be using any extraordinary measures. Just sex around O time and hoping for the best. Good luck and I hope your stay here is short.
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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-24-2011
Sun, 03-13-2011 - 9:44am
I'm in the same boat as you, I miscarried 2/19 at nearly 7 weeks. I bled for 9 days total. We were also told to wait one cycle, but didn't think it necessary, so we just haven't been preventing. Though I haven't noticed any crampy feelings like you're describing. I ovulated last Monday, so either AF will be here in about a week, or I'll test.
Me: Amy Married to Dh since 2002 Mommy to Donovan, Quinten, Lainey, angel baby 02/11
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-27-2007
Sun, 03-13-2011 - 11:30am
Hi Dana. I'm sorry to hear about your loss :( Even the early ones are a lost little one and I understand how you feel. I would say that if you're to TTC again, then there's no real medical reason to wait even one cycle. I think doctors say that so that they can accurately date your next pregnancy, but you can do that with an early u/s anyway. Good luck!!
~Katie
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2010
Sun, 03-13-2011 - 12:33pm
Hi anD welcome. I'm so sorry for your loss. I hope your TTC journey for your second will not be too long.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2007
Sun, 03-13-2011 - 6:27pm

Thanks for your replies, everyone!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2008
Sun, 03-13-2011 - 11:44pm
Hi Dana! I haven't actually posted on this board yet, just been lurking, but I had a miscarriage on 1/5 at 6 weeks spontaneously, with a week of bleeding and not too heavy cramping, and decided just to chart and try again right away. I ovulated 1/21 and we got preggo right away. I then sadly miscarried on 3/4 at nearly 8 weeks after we had seen the heartbeat. I thought for sure the second time would be successful as I have a 2 1/2 year old as well and really wanted the spacing to be just like how you wanted it! I can't say that what we did was wrong or that I wouldn't try right away again, I really don't think getting preggo right away was what caused my miscarriage. I am praying that you get your BFP and that all goes well!

As far as the cramping, I did cramp a tiny bit when I ovulated after the miscarriage, which is uncommon for me, so it's entirely possible that is what's happening! KUP and good luck!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2008
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 4:03pm

I am so sorry for your loss.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-02-2010
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 5:05pm

So very sorry for your loss... I was devistated in a way I would have never thought possiable so we understand how you feel. I had an ectopic and at 5 1/2 weeks they found it and I had to have surgery to remove our angle who was growing perfect just in the wrong place... It took me I think a month to have a AF again after surgery (which was in November) and even to this day I am not sure I am ovulating properly... The whole thing just sucks...

The feelings you are having are probably normal. You know like after you had your DD things just felt "weird" down there. I had a c section with our DS and I still felt odd. It is all the stinking hormomes.. Crazy what they can do even at 6 weeks but they are going strong even then.

Hang in there mama! We are here to talk!!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2010
Mon, 03-14-2011 - 6:35pm

Hi Dana,
I just wanted to say that I'm sorry for your loss. It's devastating no matter how soon into the pregnancy it happens. You've come to a wonderful place for support. I hope your stay here is short!

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