New with Questions

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-19-2006
New with Questions
2
Tue, 09-07-2010 - 10:23pm

Hi! My name is Heidi and last week I had a d&c after learning that I had a blighted ovum. We had several u/s and though I was hopeful we would see something there, there was nothing, just an empty sack. I am physically recovering pretty easily, but mentally Im sometimes a mess...I hold it together during the day, but at night when I'm trying to sleep and have time to think I get terribly sad...in a way I still can hardly believe this happened to me. I have had 2 mostly uneventful pregnancies (my boys are 4 and 2) and thought this time would be the same. Anyway, my doctor recommended waiting 2 cycles...do I really need to wait that long? I have a followup with the doctor next week and part of me wants to just start trying to get pregnant right after that (I think she said they are going to test my hormones and make sure everything is back to normal?). Another part of me is afraid to get pregnant again because I don't know if I could deal with another pregnancy failure so soon. But I feel like I want to hurry up and get pregnant again so I know I can have another successful pregnancy...I'm not sure if that makes sense.

How do you know when you're ready to try again?


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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2010
Tue, 09-07-2010 - 11:20pm

Welcome to the board and I am so sorry you had to come here. I dont know a ton on BO's but I know some. If you read around teh boards there are several posts saying "my doc told me to wait this long..." and "my doc said to try right away!" and so I personally think its all bologna. If you are ready to try, go for it! If you want to wait a little bit to mourn, then its best to wait. How do you know your ready? I think your heart will tell you. And to me it sounds like you are ready to go. Now I would probably recommend waiting for AF to come and THEN start trying, just so it doesnt complicate dating the pg and such if you get you BFP right away. (Which many women do) But once your betas go down to 0 and your body kicks back into gear, I say go for it. :)

Feel free to roam around and read... And post as often as you want with any questions. We are all here to support and help each other :) Again though, I am very very sorry you had to come to these boards in the first place :( I know there are some women on here who had BO and so hopefully they will respond and maybe give some more info as far as recovery goes...

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-05-2006
Tue, 09-07-2010 - 11:45pm

I am so sorry for your loss and it is totally understandable to be sad and confused. My RE wants me to wait 3 cycles before trying again but I didn't have a D&C. I have the Metho shot to dissolve an ectopic which is pretty toxic. I am glad you are physically healing but the emotional will take longer. I know it is hard waiting and I still have aways to go.

Take care.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2007
Wed, 09-08-2010 - 8:01am

Im so sorry for your loss.

I also had an uneventful pregnancy & conceived her in 3m with my 2yr old DD. We have been trying for #2 for 16 cycles & had 2 m/cs.

I know I want another so thats why Im willing to keep trying & hope for healthy pregnancy. My Dr says she is hopeful especially since I have proof I can do it. My OB told me to wait 2 cycle as well. I asked her why & she said we could try earlier if we wanted. I actually ended up not even really waiting 1 full cycle but that was by mistake. We did not conceive though as it takes me on avg 6m to get pregnant.

Anyway, Im not sure when enough is enough. Somedays are good & some are bad. If I have another m/c I will probably keep trying. I think at some point I will lay off of charting & the insanity of TTC as that makes it harder for me for keep my sanity.










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*mindy*
iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2009
Wed, 09-08-2010 - 1:41pm
Heidi, Welcome here. Thank you for introducing yourself nad for sharing your story. I am glad that youve found this board because it is a very supportive, encouraging place.
I know just what you mean about night being the worst time of the day for you. It is definitely harder for me to rest, relax and calm down when the whole house is quiet, and it's just me and my thoughts. A lot of days I am known for keeping myself extra-busy so that I dont have time to sit down and dwell on my thoughts and emotions.
As for when to try again, doctors recommend between 1-3 cycles. For some women they are ready to jump back into it and TTC right away, for others (Myself included) they need to use the next few months to cope and ready themselves emotionally. Everyone seems to have a slightly different time-frame that is "right" for them. Recent studies have shown that it does no harm if you want to TTC right away. But personally I have always waited between 1-3 months because I had a hard time dealing with all the intimacy and closeness immediately after my miscarriages.
If you have any other questions about what to expect ro how t odeal, please ask them. Remember, we are all here to help each other through the challenges of miscarriage, loss, and TTC.


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