To try or not?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2004
To try or not?
12
Sun, 01-02-2011 - 11:21am

So I have a dilemma and need some advice.
I'm Erika.

<9.27.08 Siggy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2007
Wed, 01-05-2011 - 11:07pm

YAY Erika! Welcome here, officially :)

I am a big fan of the let's-try-it-and-see-what-happens approach. It is much more laid-back and a lot less stressful than the lets-hurry-up-and-get-pregnant-like-YESTERDAY obsessive-compulsive approach!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2004
Wed, 01-05-2011 - 10:25pm
So...today is the day to decide. I either start my pill pack or I don't.

And I've decided....I'm not going to start it. I'm just going to see what happens. I wanted to drop 15lbs before TTC, but since DH is as on board as he'll probably be, and he's deploying soon. I'm just going to focus on that and see what happens without being on birth control. Thanks everyone for your thoughts - I guess I'm joining this board officially - YAY!
<9.27.08 Siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2004
Wed, 01-05-2011 - 10:22pm

Hi Torie -

I do remember you.

<9.27.08 Siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2010
Wed, 01-05-2011 - 9:52am
Hi Erika, welcome back to ttcam. I'm sorry for your losses. I remember you from PAL when I was there last year, don't know if you remember me though cuz I didn't post a lot - only my fears which came true at 35w1d when I lost my baby. (I used to be praying4baby2010)

My opinion on ttc again is go for it - especially if you seem to get pg easily, you said the first few months were hard on you two anyway, and if he'll be gone and you'll have help, then that seems pretty ideal.

If you're wanting another child, I don't think that "want" is just going to go away, so I say go for it!

Good luck!




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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-16-2007
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 3:53pm

Erika, your DH sounds a lot like mine. And I know a lot of dads who love their kids once they are born and actually can see/hold/touch them, instead of it just being an abstract "thing" inside of his wife's tummy. So I think that Rob would be the same way too, once the baby was here. ALso, I have struggled with PPD after childbirth and I know how hard that can be on a marriage and a family, but you have to keep in mind that every pregnancy is different, and you guys are in a more stable place than you were back then, when Bekah was tiny.

I think I would go for it if I were you. Not trying to tell you what to do or anything :)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2009
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 9:57am

Erika, if it were me I would TTC anyway. Especially if you think that your DH would embrace the child once it was born. My DH was the same way about my losses and I think a lot of us can say that. If he was sad at all, he was sad because I was sad. He hates to see me that way but he doesn't think about the baby we lost at all. He would have to at LEAST see a heartbeat to even consider it a baby at all. Until then, he really just thinks of it as a chemical mishap.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2004
Mon, 01-03-2011 - 1:49am
Thanks Dina! I've missed iV a ton....with us not knowing what we're going to do as far as TTC it's been hard to come back. Please be sure not to mention this on FB just yet. Seeing as we're still deciding I don't want to start mentioning it until we get a +.

Thanks for your reply - I know how much cheerleaders are valued on these boards. :)
<9.27.08 Siggy
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-14-2009
Sun, 01-02-2011 - 10:25pm

ERIKA!!! I've missed you so much girl! It's so good to see you considering TTC. I don't have any advice as to whether or not you should try again. I know your DH is pretty ambivalent about the whole pg thing and how addictive TTC can be. I remember how the last m/c devestated you to the point of walking away from iV and such. it was so heartbreaking to watch what you were going through. Now I only lurk around here, mostly to be a cheerleader to my TTCAM sistahs.

Anyways... I'll always be a cheerleader for you and the rest of the girls on the board. I know you'll do whats best for you, your DH, and Bekah.

Lots of love and hugs.



Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-24-2004
Sun, 01-02-2011 - 8:01pm

Hi Erika and welcome back to TTCAM!!! (although, of course none of us really want to be here)

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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-23-2004
Sun, 01-02-2011 - 7:33pm

Thanks Nicole and Tee.

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