Trying again after loss at 8 weeks

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2011
Trying again after loss at 8 weeks
6
Mon, 04-25-2011 - 2:50pm

Hi, I am new to this board. I had a D&C done this past Wednesday on my ninth week of pregnancy for a missed miscarriage (baby stopped developing around 7 weeks).

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-1999
Fri, 04-29-2011 - 8:45pm
Hi Laurabeth,

I am so sorry for your loss hon (((HUGS))). I'm sorry that you had to come find us, but there really are a bunch of very supportive women on this board who have been there/done that. If you have any questions at all in the process of TTCAM there is surely one of here who can answer questions for you...

As for feeling like negative feelings had anything to do with the m/c- that is a completely normal feeling, but it is so wrong. Your thoughts had nothing to do with your m/c .

I agree with Dustie- it is a good sign that you got pg so quickly, so perhaps your stay here will be short and sweet.

Good luck, welcome to the board, and I hope you get your BFP soon.

 


 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-13-2010
Thu, 04-28-2011 - 11:24am
welcome to the board, I'm so sorry for your loss. I've been married almost 13 years too. I sure do wish we had a kid or 4 to show for it.

As far as when to try, ask 3 different doctors and you'll get 3 different answers. If your doc says go for it after 2 weeks, then I'd be comfortable going for it. Many will say to wait for the first period, but if your doc says do it, then do it!

I totally get you on the feeling of your negative emotions causing your loss. My last loss was in the 35th week, after two 10 week losses. For months I did not believe I would have a baby. For months I just knew my baby would die. At 32 weeks, I finally let my mom give me a baby shower. At 33 or 34 weeks I finally thought 'I just might have a baby at the end' And at 35 weeks, he died. I totally felt like my 33 weeks of negativeness caused me to lose my baby. But that's not it. And that's not it for you either. Unfortunately, these things just happen. They suck, and they're not fair, but they just happen. Nothing you did or thought caused your m/c.

I hope you'll find the support here that you are looking for, this board has been a great support for me.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2010
Wed, 04-27-2011 - 10:27pm
Sorry for your loss. I am 35 and also ttc our first so I can understand the ticking of the clock. We m/c over a year ago and have also had cp while ttc. It's a frustrating and emotionally trying thing.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2010
Tue, 04-26-2011 - 7:15pm
I'm so sorry for your loss. This is a great board with wonderful women. I hope you get a bfp soon. HUGS in the meantime!
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2006
Mon, 04-25-2011 - 5:01pm
First of all, I would make sure that you are done bleeding before you begin TTC again. If your doctor has given you her blessing to TTC again without waiting a cycle, that's fine, but please, please please wait until you have finished any bleeding. My doctor told me the same and I was still bleeding 3 weeks post D&C and they found that my cervix was still WIDE open and that I still had products of conception inside my uterus. The doctor then became very worried about infection. Anyway, nothing in your vagina until all bleeding has ceased (and I would even wait a week or so post bleeding just to be sure that you don't get any residual bleeding, plus to just give yourself a little more time for pelvic rest for healing).

Your cycles do sound short, but I think the most important thing is to find out when you ovulate. If your Luteal Phase (time between O and AF) is less than 10 days long, then you might have a luteal phase defect and should probably get your progesterone levels tested. It doesn't matter how long your follicular phase is (yours might just be short, and that's just fine).

Seeing how you have been without BC for so long and no pregnancy, you might want to get an infertility work-up done. If your current doctor won't take you seriously, find another doctor who will. Tell them that you have been without BC for 13 years (you don't have to tell them how long you've been actively TTC) without a pregnancy and you would like to see what is going on with your cycles.

But, I have to say that your negative emotions did NOT cause your miscarriage. I think that if worry caused miscarriages, then none of us who have been TTC after Miscarriage would ever end up going on to have a healthy full-term pregnancy. We all will worry when we become pg. (((HUGS))) This is NOT your fault!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2008
Mon, 04-25-2011 - 3:24pm

Welcome to the board, laurabethh.