Trying again after loss at 8 weeks

Sorry for your loss. I am 35 and also ttc our first so I can understand the ticking of the clock. We m/c over a year ago and have also had cp while ttc. It's a frustrating and emotionally trying thing.

First of all, I would make sure that you are done bleeding before you begin TTC again. If your doctor has given you her blessing to TTC again without waiting a cycle, that's fine, but please, please please wait until you have finished any bleeding. My doctor told me the same and I was still bleeding 3 weeks post D&C and they found that my cervix was still WIDE open and that I still had products of conception inside my uterus. The doctor then became very worried about infection. Anyway, nothing in your vagina until all bleeding has ceased (and I would even wait a week or so post bleeding just to be sure that you don't get any residual bleeding, plus to just give yourself a little more time for pelvic rest for healing).

Your cycles do sound short, but I think the most important thing is to find out when you ovulate. If your Luteal Phase (time between O and AF) is less than 10 days long, then you might have a luteal phase defect and should probably get your progesterone levels tested. It doesn't matter how long your follicular phase is (yours might just be short, and that's just fine).

Seeing how you have been without BC for so long and no pregnancy, you might want to get an infertility work-up done. If your current doctor won't take you seriously, find another doctor who will. Tell them that you have been without BC for 13 years (you don't have to tell them how long you've been actively TTC) without a pregnancy and you would like to see what is going on with your cycles.

But, I have to say that your negative emotions did NOT cause your miscarriage. I think that if worry caused miscarriages, then none of us who have been TTC after Miscarriage would ever end up going on to have a healthy full-term pregnancy. We all will worry when we become pg. (((HUGS))) This is NOT your fault!