2nd follicle check - LONG, sorry

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2009
2nd follicle check - LONG, sorry
14
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:18am

I had my second follicle check this morning and I had six follicles 13, 11, 10 on the right and 13, 10, 10 on the left. I won't know my E2 level until they call me this afternoon.


I was happy with my follicle count and size as they fall right in line with what I normally have at this time in my cycle. I also compared them to what a couple of my IUI friends get and they also get about the same but the nurse didn't seem please with the progress but she was being kind of rude and short with me so I didn't ask her to elaborate. I sent an email to them this morning that will explain what happened in detail. She is not my usual nurse. My normal nurse is out of town for two weeks.


I am upset. I sent an email to my RE's office (see below) after my visit this morning. I am scared because, believe it or not, I am not usually the sqeaky wheel but DH was mad that I was upset and made me say something as I never do for fear I will make things awkward. I always just cram it all inside or let it out to you guys. I never let the person who upset know they upset me.


This is for women who are made to feel crappy by their dr's offices all over the world! LOL


Email to RE:


Melissa,


It's important to me that I preface this with the fact that I don't normally complain. I don't like to make waves so I normally stay quiet unless something is really bothering me but this is.


I know Lynn is out of town for the next couple weeks and so I had a new nurse today. I'm sorry - I don't remember her name but I'm sure you can look I up.


I had an appt this morning and after I was done with blood work and ultrasound I waited to be called back by a nurse. I thought I heard my name but wasn't sure. I went up there and asked the nurse whose name she'd called and she said something that started with a C so I assumed it wasn't me and turned around. Honestly, looking back on it, it should have occurred to me that she might have been saying my last name but she was talking so quietly it was hard to make out what she was saying. In fact, she was calling so quietly husband didn't here her call me at all, not the first or second time.


So when she called me again, I went up there and asked her to verify the first and last name of the patient she was calling and she confirmed it was me that she was looking for. I said I was sorry and she said "Well, I called you 3 times." I'm sorry - I just think that was inappropriate. I don't care how many times you called me, I said I was sorry I didn't hear you and I think a simple "No problem" or "That's okay" would have sufficed.


So she takes me back with her and after we sit down she hands me the Bravelle and says "Here, this is all the Bravelle I can give you." I also mentioned to her that I turned in my sharps box this morning because it was super full and asked her if they were able to get me another one and she said that she doesn't have any to give me and that I might be able to get one from the pharmacy downstairs.


I thanked her and she went on to tell me that my cycle is moving very slow and that she doesn't know if the dr will want to see me tomorrow or not and that she'd call me. I really would have liked for her to explain what she meant by that because today is cycle day 8 (you may want to check my chart as I think they have me ahead by a day and have me listed as cycle day 9) and I had almost the exact number and size follicles during my last Gonal-F cycle with you guys as I have this month so when she said my cycle was going slow it didn't really compute with me.


I have been doing this long enough where I kind of know where we should be regarding follicle count and size during any given point in a cycle. Cycle day 8 on average we see maybe 2 or 3 follicles between 11 and 13mm and what we saw today falls right in line with that. I was going to ask her to elaborate because I don't think this cycle has been going any slower than the last but she was being so short with me that I thought it best not to push her. It seems to me like when a follicle count and measurement is done and the nurse takes you back to talk about it, that she would say "Okay you have this many follicles and they are xyz size. That means xyz." It seems reasonable to me that all this would be explained to me as this is my body and I think I have a right to know. All she said was my cycle is moving slowly and that she'd call me. She did not go over any of the numbers or what they mean. I think I should have received more information than that, is all.


It wasn't so much anything she said specifically that bothered me, but the way she was speaking to me was just cold and short in general. It made me feel very uncomfortable. Almost like I was a bother and she was maybe annoyed with me?


I don't know if you remember my telling you this (I know you have a lot of patients!) but this is exactly the reason I left GRS. The nurse I dealt with was also very short with me. I wasn't allowed to ask questions or give any input regarding my treatment and I constantly felt like I was a bother to her anytime I so much as opened my mouth. I tried to deal with it but ultimately had to leave GRS and come to RBA. I have never felt that way with Lynn or anyone else there for that matter - until this morning.


We are 100% out of pocket and every time we set foot in your office is hundreds of dollars. Plus the fact that anyone who is seeking treatment for infertility is probably already super stressed and at the end of their ropes so it's really important that on top of all the anxiety we walk around with already, that after leaving your office we feel better than when we got there and not worse. Today, I did feel worse. I felt worse because I was made to feel like number one, my cycle is not doing so hot with no further explanation or even an attempt at some compassion about that and number two, that I was a huge thorn in her side for even asking for a sharps box or the drugs that Lynn promised me a month ago. This is making me wonder if after my IUI is done, if I am going to be able to get the Progesterone that Lynn said she'd give me without being made to feel like a bother for asking. I really hope not.


Please understand that I am not telling you all this to get anyone in trouble. That would serve no purpose at all. I am telling you this so that it does not happen to me again because like I said earlier I am already walking around with frayed nerves due to the stress of going through this for almost 5 years and I know that is not your fault but I really need to feel like I am going to get kindness and compassion when I am coming in there almost every day and spending thousands upon thousands of dollars to do it. I need to be able to know that when I have questions even if the answers aren't what I'm looking for that I am free to ask without judgment and those answers will be delivered with some tact and consideration of my feelings.


I am always kind and grateful with all your staff. I show up on time, never miss an appt and you always get paid not only in full but well in advance. I am just asking to be treated the same way in return.


You guys have been WONDERFUL up until this point and I am just trying to tell myself maybe she had a bad morning as that happens to all of us at one point or another. You have saved me so much money along the way and made every effort to try and help me where you could. I think that is why maybe I was so shocked at how I left there feeling today.


When my blood work comes back today and I get a phone call regarding my protocol for the next couple nights, I also need someone to go over what my cycle is looking like right now as after what I was told this morning, I'm worried. If it is indeed going to slower than expected, I need someone to tell me why and what, if anything, we can do about that.


Thank you,


Michelle Crance

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2008
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:30am

Oh Michelle, I'm sorry you felt that way after your appointment. I think your DH had it right and I think that the email was a good thing. It's much better than keeping it bottled up.


(((HUGS))) chica, and

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2010
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:47am

Hi Michelle


I am sorry that your experience at the doctors office has left you feeling so down. You are correct in your assumption that the nurse should treat you with respect and if you ask a thousand questions then she should have the time and responsibility to answer them all to your satisfaction. Also it is not her job to tell you whether your cycle is moving slower I believe that is the doctors not hers.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2007
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:52am

Michelle,


I am so sorry that the nurse was so rude.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2010
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:57am

Michelle, I thought your letter was very well written.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-12-2007
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 11:59am
I'm sorry about your appointment Michelle.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2008
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 12:15pm
So sorry that you had an unpleasant experience at the dr this morning. Your email was very well written and tactful, and I hope you get a kind response back coupled with a well-deserved apology!

 


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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-22-2007
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 12:48pm
I'm sorry the office was treating you that way Michelle. There's nothing like feeling like a bother by expecting someone to do their job. I think your email was very appropriate and not at all harsh, but got the point across. I hope that you never have to have another appointment like that again.

Steph sig may 2009

Steph sig may 2009

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-08-2009
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 4:27pm

Holy b*tchface nurse lady - dang girl - I would have lost my composure and ripped her a new one in the office. I think your e-mail was great - staff at RE's offices need to have a higher level of compassion and sensativity than most and if they can't give that 100% everyday, then they need to find a new profession! I hope that your dr. responds to you and has a talk with that nurse - bad day or not, that was out of line how she treated you and she needs to apologize in my eyes. We do go through a lot and count on our dr's and their offices to help us down this path of TTC as it leaves us battered and bruised. Good for you for standing up and taking the high road in your e-mail!


Let us know what happens next! :)


Ann

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-18-2010
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 4:58pm
Just have to say very well done. I like you would normally sat at home and stewed about it. I applaud you and your DH for getting you to write this. That nurse was out of line. I don't care if your having a bad day or not she needs to professional and compassionate. I hope things go well this afternoon. Good numbers and a big apology.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2009
Tue, 06-29-2010 - 7:18pm

Michelle


I agree with all the ladies. That is great you sent the email! I hope they call and apolgize until they are blue in the face! You are paying them for their services and they should treat you with respect! Great job on the email it was right to the point!

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