Why do people feel the need to gossp?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-23-2004
Why do people feel the need to gossp?
4
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 3:04pm
Okay, I know that normally I'm a very positive person, but right now I'm really frustrated.

While I was in NYC, the new principal held a barbecue at his house for the staff to get to know them. I obviously didn't attend, since I was out of town. I guess the hot topic of the barbecue was my m/c in the school van on July 1. Now, I don't know if they were gossiping in sympathy (poor Angie) or just to gossip, but I'm really mad. I don't know who started talking about it, but if one more person comes up to talk to me about it I think I will scream. The worst is one of my closest coworkers (close as in she is my teaching partner, not close as in we hang out) who came over to ask me if it was true, that I had really lost the baby in a van. Oh, please, let me just kill you now, you stupid moron.

So, now apparently everyone knows and feels this insane desire to talk to me about it or to try to comfort me ("hey, isnt' it great you got pregnant again?...you know, third time is the charm!"). I can't imagine what it is going to be like when we are actually all back as staff in two weeks (now I'm just going in on my extended contract and keep running into people). As I wasn't planning on telling people for a long while about the pregnancy and wouldn't have told any of them had I miscarried in the privacy of my own home, this is annoying. I'm sorry that I had to miscarry in a school van in front of other people, but do they need to talk about it and share it with people I'd NEVER TELL IN A MILLION YEARS????

Okay, I'm a little calmer now...maybe.


Angie

Angie

Angels 2/1/04 and 7/1/04

Our Angels, You are never far from our hearts and always in our prayers.

“It is not the fast who win the race, it is those who are firm in faith and can keep going when the race seems long and the finish line far away.”

Angels 2/1/04, 7/1/04, 8/31/04,1/1/06 DD 5/9/05 Surprise Due 5/19/07

Our Angels, You are never far from our hearts and always in

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-10-2003
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 3:59pm

Oh Angie, that's awful!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-29-2004
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 6:04pm
Angie,

I'm so sorry - you've really had a hard time lately. As if it's not hard enough to deal with the pain of m/c, you've now become public property. All I can say is STAY STRONG!!! You can rise above this and hold your head up high. And before long, a new topic of gossip will come along for the feeble-minded who have nothing bigger in their own lives than to dwell on other people's misfortunes. Good luck, and blow all your steam here, not at work!

Grace

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-11-2004
Mon, 07-19-2004 - 10:14pm
Another teacher here. I can relate to the fact that faculty can be sooo gossipy!!!

I try to be positive but I just have to say, people can be real a$$-holes!!! One of my staff members came into my classroom my first day back after my m/c and D&C and WHILE I WAS TEACHING he tried to give me hug and say some stupid words of wisdom in front of my students. All I could do is back away and say "not now." I found that people were either totaly innapproprate OR ignored my loss completely like nothing happened. I don't know which was worse.

Next time someone asks you about it maybe you can just say "why do you ask?" That always stops idiots dead in their tracks. Or simply say "that's a rude and insensitive question you complete moron..." LOL. Or maybe not.

Good luck returning to school. And hold your head high. I'm sure most people genuinely care but don't know how to react. Hopefully you have a co-worker/friend who's been there. I don't think I would've made it without my co-teacher/friend. She m/c a week before me. We cried together every other day all year. It really helped.

But again, I'm sorry for your loss and that those people could be so rude.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-02-2004
Tue, 07-20-2004 - 9:55am

Angie,


I'm so sorry that people feel the need to gossip-- and being a teacher myself I can say that I think teachers are among the WORST gossipers!