Cycle Venting time!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2010
Cycle Venting time!!!
22
Mon, 08-20-2012 - 11:56am

Good morning ladies!

Frustrated, time to vent! I am totally feeling like an outsider here. Not because of you wonderful ladies but because my lady junk is apparently so messed up that I fit nowhere within this board. I am now on CD23, and have not stopped bleeding the entire time. Some days are just spots, most days are light (not even heavy or medium) but there has not been one day when I haven't seen a bit of pink on the tissue. Our insurance issues are still not resolved, we're trying but nothing is successful as of yet, hopefully that will change soon and I can get some answers. All of my symptoms point mostly towards a hormonal imbalance, most likely associated with peri-menopause. Man, talk about coming in quickly...  It's very frustrating first it takes me 48-50 days to have a period (back in the old days before April of this year they were 27-32 days long) then when they come they are either epic or they just won't go the F away (sorry for the psuedo bad language :smileymad:). So in any event, I we are still not preventing but TBH it's kind of hard to try around all of this weird stop and start (that's how I bleed, start the day sometimes and nothing and by day's end a light flow). Anyway, it probably doesn't matter because it's pretty likely that this is NOT a fertile cycle, yeah, one never knows so I keep a tiny glimmer of hope but ugh.

So anyway that's my stupid update. I just wish to someday again be able to join my lovely ladies in the 2WW again. So afraid it won't happen :smileyhappy: If it doesn't that would be so unfair. At this point, I'd just be happy to O, though the goal is baby, O and no blood until it's time ---- normal for crying out loud would be fan-freaking-tastic. Yeah, I'm a little pissed off about the whole thing, but there is nothing I can do about it but hope that this is part of God's plan. I'm hoping all this weird cycle stuff is God's mysterious way of helping me get closer to holding the baby of my dreams in my arms and holding it as my own for as long as he/she wants to be held.  Sigh...

Hugs and dust ladies!

~Michele

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Avatar for cowboys_grl
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-28-2010
Tue, 08-21-2012 - 10:41am

oh Michele, that sounds so frustrating!!  Maybe you could find a doctor & discuss about your situation with insurance & jusr pay out of pocket & upfront for the appt....I'm sure if you explained the situation, they would be fine with you paying out of pocket,

I'm kinda, right along with you about not knowing where you are in your cycle....since my last D&C, my body is all messed up, it's been a few months & no regular cycle for me, either! So, don't feel you are alone. hugs!  :heart:

Kiki (hit my magic age of 45 and no longer TTC),but mom to a beautiful teen DD & 2 angels in heaven & married to my best friend

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2010
Tue, 08-21-2012 - 3:49pm

Michele, I have been stalking and wanted to ask how you are but I have been so busy trying to occupy my time with work and any else to not think of TTC. I have missed chatting with you so much though. I was so heart broken for you to see this cycle with all the unexplained bleeds and spots. It has to be frustrating for you. Maybe you can get that insurance figured out and get to a doc ASAP  Hopefully you can get this resolved and get back to TTC soon.  Hang in there...

Vickie

My Ovulation Chart <img      

  

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-05-2007
Wed, 08-22-2012 - 3:10pm

Hi Michele - I can't begin to imagine how frustrated you are feeling! Jeez Louise!

I agree with the suggestions of the other ladies regarding medical intervention just to make sure there isn't something "structural" going on. Another suggestion I would make is maybe looking at alternative methods, like accupunture. I started seeing an accupuncturist @2 months ago and I have already seen a leveling out of my cycle. I had decreased and brownish flow (sorry for tmi) and within the same month the flow was heavier, redder and not as long. There is also a natural fertility site that has some good information about "righting" your cycle (http://natural-fertility-info.com/natural-fertility-expert). I hope some of these things help. Hang in there.

Nessa

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-12-2012
Wed, 08-22-2012 - 10:54pm

Michele,

Ugh, I'm really with you on the lame pattern of cycles. Have you tried acupuncture or herbs like Vitex? I just started and feel like acupuncture and Vitex gave me a really good cycle last time (obvious CM changes, AF left a day early, and my luteal phase was a little longer). It's might be worth a try...Even if it is peri-menopause, I think you can still get pregnant.

Rachelle

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2010
Thu, 08-23-2012 - 10:20am

Thanks so much for all of your support and input guys. 

Since DH is a doctor, I've made him quite aware of what is going on, he seems mildly concerned but TBH, everything you read, while it does say bleeding this long should be checked out just to be certain that nothing more serious is going on, leads me towards a hormonal imbalance. I have no other symptoms except blood loss. The blood loss has NOT been heavy. In fact, I probably shed more lining last month, as heavy as last month was (but relatively normal in length). EVERYTHING points towards an imbalance/peri. Also, the insurance issue could be resolved as early as August 31st if we are willing to pay out the wazoo for the insurance - new cost 3k deductible 535 per month premium... effin crazy if you ask me!!! Considering our health is great (we applied before this bleeding thing started), what a scam! I'm more pissed at the friggin insurance industry. I would feel really silly spending a ton of money on a well-woman and all of that only to find out it was merely a hormonal imbalance - considering we could be covered by insurance in a matter of days (and there would be no out of pocket). If we decide to pay out the wazoo, we will do so by August 31st. If not, then the plan is to discuss paying out of pocket to have me checked out. In fact, I think the discussion will be something like: "our choices are: we sign up for this outlandishly priced insurance by the 31st or, we don't get this insurance and we pay out of pocket for an exam, sooner rather than later." For, DH, it is just a matter of which choice. I think the conversation, is, at this point, entirely unneccessary, because I know he has arrived at the same conclusions. So, I imagine, there will be resolution by August 31st as to the coverage, and hopefully a conclusion/resolution about my lady health by mid-September. I would prefer to just get a well-woman and the blood panel to rule out the more serious options. I'm certain that is the next step. Also, the blood draw would give me information about my hormone levels which is really what I need anyway, to determine a TTC path forward. 

I have been in a state of, somewhat self-imposed, flux now for over a year (since relocation). I was employed for 4 months but that didn't work out, now I've been unemployed for about 5 months. We always talked about being a SAHM for the child's 1st 5 years (or at least PT SAHM). With the hope that this might happen, my job search has been spotty at best. But more recently I have really been networking and going for the career I always wanted. I'm sick of putting off my life to TTC. Also, part of me hopes, that getting the career of my dreams will result in immediate impregnation... as would be my luck. But hey, if that happens, I think our plan to be a SAHM may be compromised. I may end of working PT but at least now I can get my foot in the door locally so that, perhaps, I can entertain part-time work. It isn't uncommon these days that mothers work from home for portions of thier employ. I think it could work out. 

Mostly my post was over my frustration at how my life seems to have completely halted in so many ways. Nothing has really resolved, despite our best efforts. When we moved here over a year ago the plan: sell our old house - NOT SOLD; get a job or get pregnant - NOT PREGNANT/NO JOB; get insurance - NO INSURANCE. Spinning our wheels... it gets old. At least we are generally happy and I'm pretty hearty, it's hard to keep a good woman down!!! Despite my frustrations, I am really very happy. My DH is wonderful, I couldn't ask for a better man, really. I am oh, so blessed. Some people wait a lifetime to find the kind of relationship we have. He is absolutely my best friend and I love him more than life itself, even after 25 years together. :heart:. So don't worry about me too much ladies, but I'm happy to comisserate. :smileywink:

~ Michele

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2010
Thu, 08-23-2012 - 10:25am

I miss you too, Vickie. You sound down, girl. :smileysad: Hugs to you. I obviously understand your pain... :smileysad:

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2011
Sat, 08-25-2012 - 8:24pm

Michele,

I have been doing some reading since my own experience with a funky perimenopausal cycle last month.  I have been reading a book about Chinese Medicine and fertility by Randine Lewis.  She is a medical dr that has has also been trained in Chinese Medicine. She specializes in infertility.  Anyhow the Chinese believe that we should be able to conceive from the start of menstruation until menopause.  As we get older, our system can become imbalanced, and that is what causes our cycles to become irregular.  Very interesting book.  From all of what I have read, and the workshops and fertility circles I have attended, Vitamin B6 and Royal jelly are consistantly mentioned...regardless of what approach they use.  Vitamin B6 in particular has been shown to regulate and normalize cycles.  I have been told to give it a 90 day trial before seeing the full effect, but I just wanted to share that with you.  I did add Royal jelly and B6 to my daily vitamins about 2 weeks ago. I will let you know how it goes, but I actually had less pain with AF this month than I have had in awhile. 

Vent anytime you feel you need to.  I have to tell you I was very nervous this month about what would happen since AF did not show up until CD45 or so last month. I feel your pain.  I did get AF on Wed, but that means I only had a 25 day cycle.  Not a long enough luteal phase in the TTC world. I am making some adjustments to my diet and supplements this time, so we'll see how it goes. Dh did not put out this month, so I knew I was not going to be in the 2WW in any case.  The whole thing just bites! 

Annemarie

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-12-2010
Sun, 08-26-2012 - 8:17pm
Sorry about DH, Annemarie. :smileysad: thanks also for the herbal suggestions. Both say don't take if pg or could be. So obviously we shouldn't take during the 2ww, assuming there is one.... I'm a bit worried abt the royal jelly, I'm not sure if I'm allergic to bees or not but my mom goes into anaphylactic shock from stings. I guess I could try it when DH is home though seems scary to me. I can eat honey okay I wonder if that means I could do it? Also, I've been eating clean all month. I kinda like it! Have lost 9 lbs too! No diet coke, an addiction for me, aspartame has apparently been tied to infertility I believe I've read. Also, no processed food, or at least limited to tiny bits of bread and some cheese. Feel in eating healthier anyway. Onward and upward. :smileyhappy:
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-19-2011
Mon, 08-27-2012 - 6:40am

Thanks Michele.  DH is one of my biggest obstacles. Sigh.  He has a lot of stress from his job and ex-wife & kids, so it works better for me to keep him out of the TTC loop most of the time.  The added pressure does not help matters.

They do NOT recommend Royal Jelly it if you are allergic to bee stings, so I would not take it if you think you are. One of the major things that everyone recommends is cleaning up your diet.  I love Diet Coke too, but it has to go.  There are quite a few people that cleaned up their diet and their cycle changed for the better.  I really hope you see some changes!

My goal for this month is to clean up the sugar in my diet and add more vegetables.  I need to lose about 5 lbs as well.

Keep up posted Michele, our luck has got to change at some point!

Annemarie

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-26-2012
Mon, 08-27-2012 - 6:10pm

michele & annemarie:

you both sound like you're headed in the right direction! i quit the diet coke thing about a year ago, and now i only have it as a treat.

my husband was having some health problems and his dr said to him, "i understand your frustration, but concentrate on the things you CAN control." DH didn't take that to heart, but i did. starting in june i started working out 4x/week because i couldn't sit around anymore just waiting to get pregnant. i needed my life to keep going -- i think one of you said that you were also putting your life on hold for this TTC thing -- and let me tell you it's been great. i haven't lost a ton of weight, but i do feel better, and know my body is starting to look better too, which means i feel better.

anyway, i'm thinking of you both and love that you keep updating this board!

~m

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