Hello Everyone

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Hello Everyone
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 8:51am
Hello Everyone,

I've been posting on the Prgnant over 40 board on and off since my miscarriage but I really belong here so here is my story:

I am 42 (43 in a couple of months)...I was married 18 years, had two sons, 20 and 8, divorced a few months, then met the love of my life. We married last April..he is 36 and has two daughters, 7 and 4. Prior to our marriage, we were very careful avoiding pregnancy..since I knew I was fertile and had no problems....on our honeymoon....the third time in my life I had unprotected sex, (the other two resulted in my sons), I got pregnant......well at almost 7 weeks, I miscarried, it was a blighted ovum and my ob/gyn thought I would conceive pretty easily again. I opted out of a D & C and waited, took drugs and finally miscarried in July. My period returned late Aug/early Sept and I waited till almost November to try again.....here we are in March and nothing. I panicked and went to doc late Dec and had my fsh done.....they said it looked very very good and FSH is 3. They told me to give it more time...so afte 3-4 months of trying I went to an RE last month...Scary! He told me only chance was to act aggressively now and do IVF with own eggs! I thought I could just try some drugs or something......?! And then he told me even with IVF my chances were only 10%! He did an ultrasound and found my lining very good and said I had cysts that were follicles? (still learning) and I had about 12 of them. So then I went back to my ob/gyn and (he has known me for 15 years or so) and he told me that IVF probably wouldn't help me since my risk of miscarriage would still be the same and he didn't think I needed it to get pregnant...he said I should give it another 4-6 months and then maybe try drugs.....he said I'm in great health/shape, FSH is good, follicles are good, lining, etc. and he does not doubt I am ovulating regularly (which I know I am....I ache at that time) I'll be 43 soon and I didn't want to lose any time...but I decided (I posted this on the pregnant over 40 board; whether to be aggressive or keep trying naturally) to try natural a few more months....I did go and have all my blood work done anyway....and I will have my husbands semen checked for now just in case. So many of the women on the pregnant over 40 board suggested the ClearPlan monitor...so I just used it this past cycle and I was amazed to find that I ovulated 2-3 days prior to when I thought I did! I just started charting this past cycle also to give me a clearer view...

Sooooooo, that's my story...whew....sorry so long winded....I enjoy reading many of the posts here and I wish us all success!

Barb (42)

DH (36)

DS (20)

DS (8)

And two stepdaughters, 7 and 4 that I treat as my own and who want me as their real mommy!

P.S. I plan on trying Vitex/any blends in particular? And what website may have?

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2003
In reply to: barb2612
Wed, 03-17-2004 - 4:57pm
Hi Barb,

Welcome to the board!! We are glad you found us!!

You have a very interesting story! It is true that IVF won't help you to NOT M/C. So if you choose to do IVF don't do it for that reason. It is true that your chance of conceiving in any given cycle is less and less over 40 and the chances of M/C do get higher. The good news is YOUR FSH is that of a MUCH YOUNGER woman!!

It can go up rapidly but you are pretty low. They like it to be under 10 and will do IVF up to 12. My FSH was 6 in Nov and is now 7.9.

Normally I would say you should get agressive treatment at this age but again your FSH is low. The rule of thumb for 35 and over is try naturally for 6 months and then seek treatment. I think you have made a wise choice with the clear plan as you now know your timing was off. I would not wait 4-6 more months though because there is a lot of testing and you will lose time there. I would say keep using the clear plan and in the meantime get some more testing done this way if you decide to go IVF you will have the tests out of the way.

In ref to the cysts: I think he meant that you have cysts on your follicles. Usually that happens after ovulation but you should only have 1 or maybe 2. 12 is a lot. I would have that looked into.

I do not know about Vitex but maybe Cathie will know!

Any questions don't hesitate!

******Baby Dust coming your way!!!******

Lilypie Baby Days