Just came from RE .... (sorry .. Long)

Avatar for bettykel2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Just came from RE .... (sorry .. Long)
23
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 11:01am
Hi ladies,

I'm the person with the post about the high FSH Level (18). Had the follow up visit with the RE an hour ago. Came out in tears. He basically told me that there was no hope. The level 18 indicates that ovarian reserve is no good. All my other tests were fine. I'm only 42 (will be 43 in May), I'm having a hard time believing that I am a "hopeless cause". He came right out and said there is nothing the center would do for me and feels nobody else will either. I asked about an IVF and he said there wasn't even a 1% chance with my own eggs and for the center to perfom it on me would morally incorrect. The way he talks you would think I was pushing 50! But of course he did tell me that using a donor egg, I would have a 50% to 60% chance of conceiving. There is nothing wrong with donor eggs, but it's not for my husband and I. We have discussed it. My DH and I have had 2 miscarrages. One 6 years ago and the other was just in May 2002. Both times were a surprise ... We've waited because I had aging parents to take care of and I am an only child. Mom passed away in 1998 and Dad in 2001. DH and I have been seeing each other for 7 years and we just got married in October, 2002.

I have a call into my OBGYN (he is the one that referred me to the clinic). The RE is going to send the results to my OBGYN. I also have requested a copy of all the bloodwork results and the result of the ultrasound test. I hope my OBGYN can suggest anothe RE.

I just can't believe that nobody can help me. I do understand with age that ovarian reserve decreases, but to have nothing ...

Thanks for listening. All of you ladies are so great. I wish you all the best and plenty of babydust.

I'm just going to keep hoping and as my DH says.. we will keep trying.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 11:25am

I'm sorry about the news your re gave you.

Cathie

Avatar for bettykel2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 11:35am
Thank you Cathie ... We are going to get a second opinion ...I'm hoping when my obgyn calls me he has some "hope". We'll see.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-16-2003
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 12:16pm
Hi,

I'm new to this TTC...but, from what I have read and understand, FSH levels can vary dramatically.....some women with much higher FSH than you have taken their health into their own hands and educated themselves with regards to nutrition, herbs, accupuncture, you name it and have become pregnant! I just started reading the book "Inconceivable" about a woman with high FSH levels (42 at the beginning, I think) who changed her life habits and had her baby at 44 years of age. I highly recommend reading it. It will give you hope..and great advice...tips for herbs, health, etc. There are many other women out there with high FSH levels and have conceived. You have to remain positive. I would first seek out another RE right away..and there is lots of information on the internet about successful pregnancies (even at our age) with high FSH levels. I am the same age as you, 42 almost 43, my FSH is low (at 3) and when I recently saw an RE, he said only 10% chance with IVF! Geez...I believe these RE are never very optimistic and are cautious with older women. My OB/GYN is much much more optimistic in a natural pregnancy. (Just FYI.) Don't give up. Start reading and get to another specialist. Again from what I have read you can bring those FSH levels down.

Hope this helps....I have found alot of optimism on these boards and they have sure helped my outlook.

Barb

Avatar for bettykel2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 12:27pm
Thanks Barb. Your encouragement is great. I will look into getting that book. I am going to remain positive. I too have read alot of posts and articles relating to women our age and high FSH levels and still getting pregnant. But, I told this to the RE today and got nothing but negative in return. I have started an exercise program because I do need to lose some weight. I am the same as you, my obgyn seems more confident with women our age getting pregnant. I'll see what he says to me tonight when I tell him what my FSH level was. I'm going to ask him to refer me to somebody else. In talking with his secretary today, she said he may want to have my blood drawn next cycle to see what he gets for a reading. I also told the RE that I have read about FSH levels dropping and he said once a level is indicated high, then a low level means nothing ... Ovarian reserve is what it is.

Can you imagine how I felt leaving this guy's office.

Thanks again and good luck to you...

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-30-2003
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 4:23pm
Sending you a big (((HUG))). I have had a similar experience with a negative RE. Getting a second opinion is definitely the way to go. I have read of many women with higher FSH levels than you mention getting pregnant...

Stay positive!! Take care...

Margie

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-26-2003
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 7:17pm
Hi Betty,

I am so sorry that you are having such a hard time. Don't give up! I am still trying to recover some data for you and feel that you do have a chance as I had read about the success of those other women w/ high FSH who took Metformin.

I was on the phone all day w/ apple & earthlink again today and still have 1 small glitch in my email but I am getting up and running. There is probably 300 or so emails that I have to look through to find those for you so hang in there with me. I had them saved but lost them when my computer crashed.

I truly believe if you register with Dr. Alan Beer that you have a good chance. His web address is losgatos@repro-med.net You can also get more info on this

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/immunologysupport

I will be in touch.

There is hope!!

Lisa
Lilypie Baby Days
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-18-2004
Tue, 03-23-2004 - 8:27pm
GET ANOTHER OPINION!!! This RE can't tell from ONE FSH level what YOUR chances of concieving are. I know LOTS of women who have had a high FSH level and gone on to get pregnant... myself included! Sounds like this clinic is just concerned with their own statistics and don't want to take on someone who does not have an excellent chance of getting pregnant! Sorry to rant but I have seen this happen SO MANY TIMEs and women leave offices in tears and then go on to get pregnant either on their own or under the care of an RE who gives them a chance. If I were in your shoes I would dust myself off and get another referral. You may want to get another CD3 FSH/E2 test done through your OB/GYN and see what your levels are next cycle. Essentially I have found that Fertility clinics are divided into two camps... a) the ones who, base on one high FSH level say you have no chance of getting pregnant and b) the ones who feel that you have better chances when your FSH levels are low on a given cycle even if you have had high levels on other cycles.

Ok... so you can tell I strongly disagree with this doctor's opinion. You are only 42 and you have only had one medium high FSH result.... don't give up! You really need more information and a chance to give it a try.

Best of luck ~ Pat (mom at 46)
Avatar for bettykel2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 03-24-2004 - 7:22am
Hi Lisa,

Thank you so much. Don't worry about finding other e-mails, concentrate on getting up and running again. I will go to the link and take a look.

Also, my ob/gyn called me last night at 8:30. He told me right away, we need a second opinion. He hadn't received anything regarding my results from the RE yet, but he told where to call to get a second opinion. It's not a clinic it's through a hospital. So, this morning I have to get on the phone and start making some calls. My ob/gyn is going to let me know when he receives the info from the RE. He seemed disgusted with this guy.

Thank you so much .. I will keep you posted.

Avatar for bettykel2002
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 03-24-2004 - 7:25am
Hi Pat,

Thank you for your encouragement. As I just posted to Lisa, my Ob/gyn called me last night and when I explained what the RE said he immediately said we need a second opinion. My ob/gyn is going to let me know when he gets the results from the RE. As I said before, I can't believe that I don't have at least one good egg left that is worth a try. I've even read about women our age who have irregular AF's and still an RE will help them. Well, not this guy. I will keep you posted.

Again thanks ...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Wed, 03-24-2004 - 4:24pm
Hi bettykel-

Just read through this whole thread and I am so happy you landed in a place with such intelligent and CORRECT women to support you and provide excellent suggestions!

I have just one thing to say: If a doctor ever talked to me the way your RE (and sadly, so many others I have read about on IF sites) talked to you, I truly think I would just say - right in the middle of the appt. - "I really can't waste any more time with you - we're obviously not on the same page - SEE YA." (I'm sure I'd be thinking about saying something a little cruder than that!) Yes, doctors are knowledgeable and well-schooled and good ones can be true heroes and lifesavers, but they are not GODS (as my Mom a retired RN so often reminded me) and they are not always right and they don't always know what's best for each individual and they NEVER have a right to insult and demean their patients, under any circumstances.

Chalk this one up to a bad apple in the bunch, and get right back on that horse and find another RE! I am quite new to IF treatment and have only met with my RE twice - but when my first (and so far only time tested) FSH level came back at 11.4, she indicated her "concern," hoped it would turn out to be my high-end result, and when I said to her that I didn't know if I should leave her office hopeful or depressed, she very tactfully said "well, let's just say it's something we need to watch." Now, she certainly didn't fabricate or sugarcoat or pretend with me just to make me feel better (that's not going to do any good, either) but she certainly did convey her concerns in a very respectful and caring way.

Let's face it, IF and TTC are damned emotional enough without our doctors beating us up and insulting us and making us feel worse, or uninformed, or misguided, or delusional for wanting to give TTC our best shot despite any and all statistics or cases to the contrary.

Hope I didn't get too preachy and soap-boxy for you - I just feel so strongly about this with ALL doctors (even dentists!) not just REs!

Best of luck, keep fighting, listen to your heart and your gut!

Regards,

Leah

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