Coming from TTC after Miscarriage Board
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| Wed, 05-23-2007 - 2:23pm |
I have been on the TTC after miscarriage board, however, just found this message board which relates to me as well as I am 40 and TTC.
I miscarried about 2 weeks ago, first one. I really didn't expect that I would. I thought I would get pregnant and have a baby, never entertaining the thought of miscarriage. Didn't think it would happen to me. Found out I was pregnant right before my 40th birthday, and then miscarried at 12 weeks (found out through an ultrasound). It was devastating to have gone almost three months thinking I was pregant, and then to find out I wasn't (blighted ovum?). I was really worried about my "window of opportunity" due to being 40 years old. I heard much negativity about my age! Although my mother had me at age 44 (naturally).
My DH and I are like so many of you, with a full life enjoying travel, sports, camping etc etc. I never thought I wanted children, and then I met my DH close to 40 years of age. When I found out I was pregnant, I wasn't happy, I thought my full life was over...I couldn't have that glass of wine, go horseback riding...so on and so forth. Then after a while, I really wanted to have the baby, and realized that I could still do lots of stuff! Of course as I mentioned earlier I miscarried. My DH and I were both so sad. For a while, I kept thinking that it was me, and must have been my age. Everyone on the message board has been so supportive. I realized that I am not alone, and there are lots of women over 40 having babies. My mother was one of them when she had me at 44 years of age. I had the best childhood, she did so much with me.
I truly believe 40 is a great age to have a child. TTC again.
Carolina
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Carolina,
There are many wonderful women on this board (as well as the Pregnant After 40 board, where there are sections for those of us 40 and over who're trying to conceive). I am so sorry for your tragic loss. Your story sounds a lot like mine... got married at 41, pregnant shortly thereafter and misarried. My third miscarriage was this past winter when I was 17 weeks along...We thought we were well past the safe period and told everyone...and then had to tell them a few days later that I had lost our baby boy. :-( I turned 45 last month and can feel the clock ticking loudly...
I will tell you that I have plenty of friends who had babies at your age (their firsts). And a dear friend had two miscarriage (all around 13 weeks) and then got pregnant at 43 and delivered a healthy gorgeous baby when she was almost 44.
You sound like a wonderful woman who had happily come to terms with being pregnant, even though it would've meant changing your lifestyle.
I wish you the best of luck in TTC again...Please be sure to get plenty of rest. Your body's been put through the wringer and deserves it!
xxoo
Lois
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Yes, it is wonderful to have this support. I can't imagine the pain you felt after thinking you had gotten to the safe period, and then telling everyone (We didn't tell anyone, so no one knew). I really do wish for you that conceive your #1....sending much luck your way!!!
Carolina
Welcome, Carolina.
I'm so sorry to hear about your miscarriage.
Carolina
Thats encouraging....I never really looked at it that way.
Carolina