done clomid, perganal, herbs...now what?

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2004
done clomid, perganal, herbs...now what?
4
Mon, 08-30-2004 - 1:47am
hi. 40 and ttc the last few years, never had a baby but had an abortion at 19. since 38 have tried naturally, added chinese herbs, 3 cycles of clomid, and one cycle of perganal. relationship has also been challenged by our situation. dh has had ED. sex had become very clinical. things are great between us now and we're trying to be consciously be positive and pray while ttc. also looking into adoption after doc said my fsh level is high which means my eggs are probably old or of poor quality. he said getting an egg donor is probably a good option for us. we're burnt out after "working" so hard the last few years. we've got another cycle of perganal and hcg in our fridge but we're taking a break from fertility treatments and regrouping now. i'm tired of those shots in the butt!

after trying the last few years i thought i accepted the fact that adoption is probably the best option for us but since we started researching and talking to agencies it's really breaking my heart.

tired of mom saying i shouldn't have put my career before getting pregnant (i was just waiting for the right guy and i wasn't ready to marry until a few years ago). not talking to many friends because it's hard for me hear advice or see pity on their faces. getting hard to see friends with their kids or especially newborns. it makes me feel so pathetic. i should be thrilled for them. i fake it but inside i'm hurting.

anyway, feeling pretty sensitive and discouraged. i'd appreciate your support and suggestions,

meels

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Mon, 08-30-2004 - 10:59am

We've all felt like you do one time or another.

Cathie

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2004
Mon, 08-30-2004 - 1:09pm
thanks. this is a great place to feel like i'm not alone but sometimes i read about the successes and wonder what i'm doing wrong. i know i need to be more positive. i've ordered "infertility cure" and "inconceivable". i've already done the acupuncture, herbs and still do yoga/pilates/etc. but, maybe there's still something more to consider.

a question about egg donors and "embies". can you explain how this works or refer me somewhere that explains the process? are these all part of IVF? are embies started in a petri dish whereas eggs from a donor are inseminated using the turkey baster method? my husband's sperm is fine so he could definitely be part of our baby but if we use someone else's eggs is there any of ME that will get transferred to a baby just by osmosis? just curious about what gets transferred genetically/hereditarily from the "host" mommy.

thank you,

meels

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2003
Mon, 08-30-2004 - 1:43pm

eggs are what is gotten from the follicles, not every follicle contains an egg.

Cathie

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-17-2004
Mon, 08-30-2004 - 2:33pm
thanks so much cathie. we were kind've against ivf because of the cost but now that we're looking into the adoption that route doesn't really sound easier or cheaper. we need to talk to our doc more (what does RE mean...it seems like a lot of you refer to that as your fertility doctor?) about egg donors, embryo donations, ivf, etc.

i ended up on this board after venting about my life elsewhere. one of the responses was "why are you trying to get pregnant at YOUR age? do you realize the risks involved in having a baby when you're THAT old?" i didn't appreciate those comments, although i suppose they are valid questions, so i ended up here.

i'm glad you're all here,

meels