End of the Line???

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-17-2009
End of the Line???
Mon, 05-31-2010 - 2:15pm


DH & I have a Bio DD (5), we have been trying on & off since she arrived. Finally, I made an appt with an RE 1 year ago, to see why we weren't successful. I checked out ok, with the exception of my age (now 41!), but my DH has MFI, we had no idea! We wasted precious years trying, when apparently our odds were slim to none. So the RE suggested IVF w/ICSI, we really didn't want to go down this path, but really wanted the chance to parent another child.

Well....we recently finished our 1st cycle with NO success, we didn't make it to ET. I did not respond well to the meds and only got 2 mature follies, the rest were all small, 1 was stuggling to make it to maturity. So at ER, they only got 1 eggie! We were so disappointed to say the least! I got the call the following morning that my 1 egg did not fertilize. We are dumb founded. My family seems pretty fertile. My FSH was 10 or 12 depend on when they tested. I am in good health.

On my follow up appt with RE, she said due to my age (41, turning 42) I may not have many eggs left & they may be of poor quality. That is the reason I did not respond well to the meds.....

Due to DH MFI & my age, she now recommends we use DE for our next cycle. She said that insurance prob wouldn't cover another IVF with my eggs because of low response. She did say that we could try a few IUI which I found strange, since at the beginning of this journey, she said no IUI, straight to IVF

I am drained......and not sure what to do. I am confused about DE and really going down that path......AND of course, I am having a BIG problem giving up on my own eggs and have another BIO child. Not sure I am ready to throw the towel in yet.

BUT....time is of the essense and don't want to waste my time, etc with my eggs if it just isn't going to work. I know couples who have done IVF 7 x with no success and I feel like I just don't have that kind of time.

Has anyone had a poor response to the meds and did better with changing the protocol?? I asked RE about changing the meds and she replied that they had me on the most aggressive protocol and changing a med won't make a difference.

Any thoughts??? Thanks so much!!!

1st IVF (should have been cancelled due to low response but they didn't to proceeed with 2 mature follies, ER = 1 egg

Lupron 5IU/Gonal F 300 IU/Reponex 150 IU

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-19-2008
Thu, 06-03-2010 - 10:10pm

Hi Renee, and welcome to the board.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2004
Mon, 05-31-2010 - 5:17pm

Hi Reneema,

I am so sorry this has been so stressful for you. I have not gone that route at all and have no experience to offer you.

I would recommend getting some more tests done, starting the donor egg process since it can take awhile, but possibly trying one more round of the IVF as well. Like Martha said, you really don't want to waste any more time, but I can also see where you would want to have another bio-child. We have four children, three are bio and our second oldest is adopted. Even though he did not come from my body and shares no genes with any of us, he is still very much our son and we love him lots. If you are willing to do IVF, then there is little difference in doing IVF with DE. The other possibility is embryo adoption, not sure how the costs compare.

Whatever you decide I hope things go well for you. Keep us posted okay?


Loving Mom to three


Loving Mom to three rambunctious 

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-27-2009
Mon, 05-31-2010 - 4:10pm

hi, Reneema,
The same thing just happened to me. One and only IVF. Aggressive protocol (microdose lupron- which you might try if possible, 300 of menopur and bravelle) and no follicles at all. Had an FSH of 3.3, but an AMH level of .1. I see the writing on the wall. Even if they get more eggs, odds are that they will not work. Then, you'll be 3,6,9,12 months further along. I recommend that you really discuss this with your DH. But, also go over to the donor egg board. There are lots of ladies over there that thought they would never have a child at their age who are over the moon because they're pregnant with a donor egg. As someone put it, it is only one cell. And, it is still your child, and your husband's genes too. Read Krista's posts. I hope to have that kind of happiness in the near future -- not sadness after 1.5 years more of banging my head against the wall doing IVF that won't work.

The other thing is that the whole donor egg process is not fast... I've been hearing 3-6 months. I've waited 2 weeks just for the application-- the APPLICATION! then waiting for the appointment, then waiting for the meds, then waiting for the BCPs.... etc... I just turned 43 and am now concerned that , if I do a round that doesn't work, it will be more like 2 years before I actually have a child...

I hope this helps. It is really hard to give up on your own eggs, I know. I feel fortunate that I had absolutely no follicles whatsoever... made the decision crystal clear for me. But, these doctors do know what they're doing and they're trying to give you the path that has the greatest chance of success. Sure, there is a possibility for a one in a couple hundred chance that you could do another IVF round and get that one golden egg. But, I looked at those charts and I saw that steep curve downward as I got to my age and I realized that chances were really slim.

Go over to the other board and check it out.... I hope this helps.

all the best,