Find a Conversation
|Sun, 11-16-2008 - 3:15pm|
Evil jealousy is creeping into my life. It seems as if everyone in my family either just had a baby or is pregnant, and yet here I am, desperately trying to have my second little one.
Do you all get jealous? My cousin just had her second child in two years, my sister-in-law is pregnant and now I just learned another cousin is pregnant. That means the holidays will be filled with babies and pregnant talk. I don't know how I am going to handle that.
I have one child, D6, whom I love to death. And I know I am blessed to have her -- truly, truly blessed with a lovely, beautiful, smart, polite little girl. But I ache for another baby! And I find myself getting snippy about this stuff going on around me, even though I should just be happy for them. I feel as if I am being punished in some ways, for being upset like this or something. I'm trying to be accepting, optimistic, positive, hopeful, but every month when AF arrives it's like a knife through my heart and I don't know how much more I can take or when to accept that it might not happen for my family.
My H isn't as affected by this as I am. He would be fine with an "only," and sometimes I think it would be OK and easy and all that, but I'm feeling that clock ticking so rapidly. And so I get jealous sometimes... Do you??