Feeling Hopeless

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-29-2009
Feeling Hopeless
Wed, 09-02-2009 - 10:54pm
This has been my third menstrual cycle since m/c and still no BFP. Also my menstruals have been 23-25 days apart rather than 28. My leutal phase seems to be about 13 days which I believe is good so I'm wondering if there is a problem before ovulation such as estrogen or something. I am beginning to feel hopeless about getting pregnant again. I worry that the m/c may have caused further problems with conception. I still feel so sad about losing our baby and time only makes me reflect on how very pregnant I would be now. How can I improve my fertility?
Lilypie angel baby Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-31-2004
Thu, 09-03-2009 - 2:53am
I am so sorry you are feeling so down about it right now, but don't give up. Three months can seem like a long time, I know. We are now on our third month of actively TTC since our loss as well, but really this is the first month where I really feel it is even a possibility with timing and everything. Only time will tell what will happen for you, but do give it more time. I think you said your first month of trying was kind of a write off, and you were even surprised to get pregnant in the first place. It sounds to me like things are going okay, but it just hasn't been the right time yet. Frustrating, I know. Have you talked to a dr about TTCing? They could maybe do some tests so that you would have a better idea of what is going on. There are a few other things that some of the ladies have talked about, check out some of the threads under FAQs and maybe you can find something there that will help you. In the meantime, remember that you are not alone, and TTCing after 40 often takes a little longer than in the early years. Longer, but not impossible. ((((Hugs))))


Loving Mom to three


Loving Mom to three rambunctious 

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-07-2006
Thu, 09-03-2009 - 10:51am

If you are concerned about hormones playing a part in your cycle being a little off, you could ask you doc to do a hormone panel. However, being three months past MC is not long. The good news is, you CAN get PG. Hold on to that. Hugs.


iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2009
Thu, 09-03-2009 - 12:07pm
Hi Betsy,
I could have written your email myself. I am also in my 3rd cycle since m/c and hopelessly missing our baby. I keep thinking of what I would have been doing instead of what I am doing. And I feel so tense wondering what's taking so long to get pg again. Then I wonder what is "so long". I was thinking that way last time I got pg too, and then we did conceive, a bit unexpectedly. So I tell myself to relax and just enjoy my time together with DH and kids. Hard, but I am trying.
I also have been focusing on doing what I want. Being very selfish at times, especially when I'm by myself. I go out and try on 50 pairs of shoes or watch a couple of favorite movies. Trying to help me be at ease even though I am not at peace. The key is to fill more of my time distracted by other things which don't consume me as much as ttc.
I agree with Lena about the hormones. Although I don't necessarily think you should be worried at this point, but you know your body best. And if you feel something's wrong, don't hesitate to voice your concerns with the doc and ask for clarification of your situation so you can be at ease knowing you're covering all your bases.
Hang in there. We're right there with you. Wishing you all the best.
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-17-2007
Thu, 09-03-2009 - 9:35pm
We also lost our baby June of this year, and even though it has only been 3 cycles I feel exactly the same way. As a matter of fact my cycles have been shorter too?? I was thinking maybe I am "o"ing too early, idk but I just wanted to give you ((((hugs)))), we are all here facing different struggles but longing for the same thing:)..I hope you can get some answers and see a BFP soon!




iVillage Member
Registered: 05-28-2008
Fri, 09-04-2009 - 5:29pm

hey gals, i'm about 6 months post m/c and my cycles are JUST getting back to normal. it's taken it's sweet time!!! my cycles were longer, then shorter and now finally i feel like they may be regulating!!! I asked my dr. about it and she said it can truly take 6 months for your body to get back to normal. i know it's hard to think about 6 cycles post m/c, but I am thankful to be getting back some normalcy!!! good luck to you all!!