Hello and introduction
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|Fri, 12-28-2012 - 12:57pm|
My name is Beth. My husband and I have been married for 15 years. He is 40 and I am 39 ~ I will be 40 in June 2013. I have always, always, always wanted children. I decided this past summer that it was time. If I did not get pregnant now, then I very well might miss my window of opportunity. I wish I knew why we were starting this late in life. I have not been on any type of birth control for about 11 years now, but I have had significant thyroid issues. I also had a laparascopy for stage 1 endometriosis about 14 years ago. I also have periodic problems with ovarian cysts.
Regardless the issues I have had in my life, I decided to seek help from a fertility clinic in hopes of getting pregnant. I have been taking Femara for about 5 months now and God willing, I hope to be able to afford an IUI next month. I just got back from my appointment with my fertility doctor. I had blood work done as well as an after ovulation ultrasound to look at follicles. My husband and I have been doing planning/timing using blood work results from my doctor, ovulation kits, a planning calendar, timed intimacy. According to my last ovulation kit done this past Wednesday, I successfully ovulated, my husband and I had a wonderful day. I pray it takes.
In June, I saw my OBGYN and told her my future plans. Initial blood work (Day 3 of my cycle) was normal, but Day 21 showed a somewhat low progesteron (11) but there was little concern because my number was on the low end of the scale my OBGYN uses. I was told to repeat Day 21 blood work in July and came back with my progesterone at 7 with NO signs of ovulation. That is when I started taking Femara and was refered to my fertility doctor. There was a three month wait and I saw him for the first time in October.
For the past 5 or 6 years of my life, I have jokingly told people I was age 29+ and left it at that. I am blessed with genes that allow me to look younger than my age. My nurse told me that today. However, as much as I am light hearted about the age thing, the weight of being almost 40 is heavy on me and trying to get pregnant has truly been an emotional roller coaster. There are days I leave the fertility clinic with high hopes and excitement for what could happen in my future, and there are times like today where I feel anxious and wonder if I am absolutely crazy for pursuing pregnancy at my age. My high school friends are now raising teen agers. Some of the people I have graduated with have already watched their child graduate from high school. Here I am trying for my first.
I want this more than anything in the world. It surprises me the anxiousness and second guessing and the emotions I am feeling with all of this. This is absolutely crazy and that is how I feel right now. lol. How do I get past this??
My doctor is wonderful. He is the best at what he does and I am BLESSED with a support group of women who have pregnancy experiences using this doctor. Only one person in my support group is my age, and God love her, she was able to get pregnant with her first or second IUI, but lost her baby due to issues that developed making the baby incompatable with life. This is my greatest fear. This person is one of my dearest friends since high school and seeing her go through this is hard.
Honestly, I have been hopeful and relaxed for the most part, but every now and again, that anxiety just creeps up on me and I have to take deep breaths and realize what I am doing is something MANY women in their 40s are doing.